A true valentine
by Cid Dante
Summary: Cid heads to Nibelhiem because he feels something is missing but finds one of his former allies in need of his help....cidvin pairing later
1. Default Chapter

Ok, I don't own the rights to final fantasy 7, the brilliant Squaresoft do…though maybe they shouldn't of put their name to the final fantasy movie……let's not speak of that. Well, anyway, here's a warning, Cid is cid in this and as I don't believe in the damn censor law when it comes the damn man, he swears. A lot I think…also, it will have a Cid/Vincent pairing thing to it…once I get around to it. I'll let the two guys sweat it out for a while longer….and I should be saying this at the bottom bit right? A flying elves called Legolas….don't own him either….dammit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is a long story, the first bit anyway, it's kinda testing the water amd plus, it kinda saves me from having to explain why the wait is so long, it's a bumper pack chapter. Also, I'm knew to this whole, fan fiction thing so so me if one or two parts are a little weird. As long as it follows and makes sense! And I do apologize for making these bits too long, I just like to rabble on and on and on… So as the great Cid Highwind is known for saying in the game, "Sit your ass down and drink your goddamn tea!" 

What would you give?

The old Shin-Ra mansion seemed to be far too big and far too old to even standing. The secrets it held shouldn't be known to anyone but they had been found and it caused terror to the world. 

Vincent Valentine stood at the door, his metal claw hand lightly pressed on the heavy wooden door and sighed. He had just witnessed the destruction of the most powerful city on the planet in just under a matter of minutes. The huge form of Meteor crashing down, killing all those unfortunate enough to be caught in the death.

Everyone on board the airship _Highwind_ had stood in silence, taking in the scene, the usually talkative captain stood slack jawed and in awe. It certainly was something to behold. It was a once in a lifetime chance. To see the death of a once powerful city brought to it's knees by nature. It was ironic, the city had tried for so long to kill the planet and now, it had been the planet that destroyed the city.

Bright colors shone out from Midgar as Meteor fell, reds, of all sorts of hues bleed into the city, Holy was having the opposite effect and was dragging the huge rock closer to Midgar but then, Vincent felt something, something serene but he had pushed the feeling aside. 

Vincent had watched the captain move slowly to the controls, every move not as graceful or as fluid as it usually was. The captain said nothing as he silently brought the mighty airship, or what was left of her closer towards Midgar. The huge form of Meteor had almost devastated the once great city, the large plate structure had been completely ripped off, allowing the people underneath it to finally see the long hidden heavens. The serene feeling he had felt was still lingering, like a dream or a scent of a heavenly perfume that refused to dissipate into the winds.

Life as everyone knew it was going to change, for the better or worse. No one knew what would happen next, Vincent merely wished to avoid any type of involvement in the future, he was quite happy to remain hidden in the basement of the dark mansion he had resided in for the past 30 years. Life would continue on as it had without him, no one would miss him.

No one had missed him during his thirty year slumber, he had no family. No friends yet why did his heart feel like he was leaving something important behind? Whatever life he had with AVALANCHE and it's members was over. He decided that it would be best if he saw none of them again and had expressed his wishes of solitude to almost everyone. He couldn't bring himself to deny Cid rights to visit him.

He had been dropped off in Nibelhiem by the captain and had gotten an awkward farewell from the small AVALANCHE group. Everyone had thought he was freaky and he really couldn't be interested in telling them otherwise. The dark man thought he saw a look of hurt on the captain's face as he left the ship. The two hadn't been close but they considered each other to be friends of a type. The fact that the captain hadn't turned his nose up at him when the pair had to share a bed had to be a good sign. The others avoided sharing a bed with him but the pilot would end up cuddling into him as the others slept, although the pilot didn't know that.

Captain Cid Highwind had been the last member of the group to join, he had always been the outsider along with Vincent. The rest seemed to hang out with each other but avoided interacting with Cid and Vincent. The pilot had a habit of telling those around him what he thought, when he thought it. His attitude always grated on Barret Wallace's nerve and on more than one occasion the pair had to be separated from one another. Vincent would watch, fascinated by the younger men. Neither would apologize to each other yet, Barret had followed Cid's leadership when they had went to Corel. The younger blonde had assumed the role of leader when he had been dozing and had swore that if any other decisions like that were made again when he slept, then the group would be tied down and would have various sharp, hot metal objects inserted into as many different places the captain could think of in their places.

Cid more than made up for feeling left out by being as loud and as annoying as he possibly could but still AVALANCHE had it's own little group. They had saw Cid only as a means of travel to get to point A to B with safety, although the way the pilot flew, Vincent wondered if the flight instructors had heard the blonde pilot swear at something had had just handed him a flight paper and pointed to a plane.

The pair were never going to be completely accepted into the eco-warrior group because they were both Shin-ra. Cid a high ranking pilot and Vincent, former Turk. 

He allowed a small smile to escape onto his pale face as he walked into the mansion but it quickly fell as the memories sent into his head flashed before his red eyes. 

The images showed pain, hurt, all those he killed as a Turk and a simple voice came through his head.

__

Welcome home.

****

Rocket Town

Cid Highwind dragged his feet across the dusty ground to his home. The street was empty, the towns people must be in their homes. Trying to comprehend the events that had just conspired. It had only been a few hours since he'd pulled AVALANCHE's asses out of the North Crater as it exploded with Mako and gushed with the Lifestream. He hadn't fully grasped the fact that he was now classed as a hero for a different reason other than his flying skills. 

He didn't feel any different than he had a few hours ago save a few new bruises and scars that won't heal but a few hours ago he was doing something he hoped that no one else would have to do. Saving the planet from a alien and her crazed half human son with a bunch of people who he didn't know.

The captain could barely believe it himself, he had just saved the planet. He had came here a few nights back, all set to die. What hope on the planet did they have? What little they did was killed when Aeris had died and the team had lost their way, all the while being guided by the unwitting pawn of Sephiroth. The pilot had felt ready to hang up his goggles a few nights back and kiss his pilot ass goodbye but something had brought him home. He wanted to stay with Vincent and check out the bars in Junon but Vincent had pushed the captain to Rocket Town, saying: _if you die and haven't told the ones you love how you feel, then they may hate you. You will forever torment yourself in the next life and the next, you will seek her forgiveness in every life you live and in every form you will take._

He had told Shera Noah how much he loved her and how sorry he was for not being the guy she wanted or needed. He had said a lot of things to her that night, he found that if he didn't, she might not know as to how he felt about her, about a lot of things.

Now he had to face her again and tell her that he had been high on drugs or drunk or something. He really didn't want her to come running into his arms and sobbing. Weak people did nothing for him, he liked fire and passion but he'd be the first to admit that Shera was a real fire cracker when her mile wide fuse was lit.

He had had enough of that in Junon with all the grateful people hugging him and kissing him. Part of him was almost convinced that one of the male thankers had groped his rear end either that or it was Vincent. The tall dark man had stood closely and seemed just as embarrassed as the captain. Maybe the rear pincher had got him too?

Cid heard excited yells and he spotted the towns people rushing to him, looks of amazement and relief had became common place for them. The first of the towns people rammed him to the ground and started hugging him. The pilot blushed furiously and felt them kiss his blonde head. Various shouts of praise were being shouted. 'Way to go captain' or 'thank the gods' or 'Ya did it'. 

He was a little hurt that no one was asking him how he felt, not that he would of told them. He hadn't told the others of AVALANCHE how he felt or was going to anytime soon. As far as he was concerned, he didn't want to see their faces ever again. A month and a half of travelling close quartes with a group of strangers either broke a friendship or made it. For the pilot it had most definalty broke it. He couldn't stick being around them, save for the quiet dark former Turk who had watched his back in battle.

The pilot squirmed underneath the growing dog pile that was growing on top of him. He wanted nothing more than to crawl into his nice warm bed, to drink a decent cup of tea and to have a proper meal. he didn't care what order it happened in, as long as it happened.

He finally crawled out from underneath the chaos and sighed, why couldn't he just of stayed in the town and not went with Cloud and the rest of the guys? His life would have been much simpler and easier to deal with, granted he could be dead but it was better than being depressed again.

A single raindrop fell on his head, he hadn't even noticed the sky. So unlike him, the stars were slowly making their wonderful appearance. The captain wiped the drop away and looked to the mountains of Nibel. He thought of Vincent Valentine, alone in the creepy old Shin-Ra mansion.

__

Wonder what he's up to. Is he ok? The fuck did he go back to the damn mansion for? I thought he wanted to start over…he talked…ok, he suggested that there was someone he could start over with but who was he talking about? The damn vampire…, Cid narrowed his eyes, once he'd settled he'd go to Nibelhiem and visit the dark man. The former Turk was the only one he truly felt secure with in the team. The only one who seemed to have a healthy dose of real life in his head, instead of the crazy dream land the others had fantasised. 

"Captain!" a female voice shouted out to him, he instantly recognized the light voice. It was Shera, the wonderful Shera.

"Hey," was all he mustered. He didn't want to talk much, he just wanted silence. A chance to get his head in order, to sort out his feelings. When he was taking AVALANCHE home, no one had said a word, the bridge filled with a nice silence with only the humming of the airship's engines breaking the peaceful silence. It gave him time to figure out what just happened and what he'd now do after it.

He'd just saved the planet and people were wanting to know how he felt, he didn't know how he felt. What made them think he did?

Shera sat down beside him, her eyes trying to lock onto her captain's blue eyes. He avoided her gaze, his eyes locked onto the mountains. 

"Are you alright captain?" she placed a hand on his shoulder, this wasn't the same man who had left a few days back. This one looked like a shell of him.

"Yeah," Cid nodded, "Just a little tired."

__

Are you alright captain? Shera's words rang in his head, she hadn't asked him how he was, she asked him if he was alright. There was a difference, the way she said it made him want comfort even more than ever and he wasn't fussed who knew but found he couldn't show it. He'd been used to barely surviving or living in cramped spaces for the past month or so. Comfort was a luxury the team couldn't afford. The only man who he allowed to show any weakness to was gone, living on the other side of the mountains. The choice of showing Vincent wasn't really given but sometimes sharing a bed with him was weird. The team had never really had lots of money so they didn't stay in inns very often but when they did, it was usually cramped and two to a bed. Everyone avoided sharing with Vincent but Cid simply shrugged and bunked down with him. The guy was human after all, the others were making him feel like a damn leper and that boiled his blood to no end. Vincent was part of the team. He would always be part of the team, no matter what demon took his form in battle.

__

Understandable. He has just saved us all, Shera smiled sympathetically, he did seem tired. A hot meal and a decent night sleep should make him feel better, she sniffed the air and found the captain also needed a good bath too.

She pulled him closer to her, ignoring how he smelt. Oil, smoke, sweat and the various other monster smells all intermingled together.

****

Nibelheim

He tore the bedroom up in a fit of blind rage, punching and kicking the walls. His voice screaming in pain and anger. He had 30 years of pent up anger and pain to vent and he didn't care if it took another 30 to vent it out. He had to get rid of it. He felt as though it was killing him, slowing poisoning his mind. 

The rooms were filled with dark memories he didn't want to recall. The room he was in filled with the emotions of Lucrecia and Hojo, the bed. The bed were Hojo and Vincent's beloved had shared their love, while the Turk sat in the next room. Vincent's heart had been broken over and over as he heard Lucrecia call out Hojo's name in passion. He wished nothing more than to rip Hojo's throat out at that moment in his life.

He knew the only way to the destroy the pain was either to destroy the house or to destroy him, no way was he going to die. Not after surviving the horrors of Hojo. He would not fall to the madness that was consuming him.

Inside he could fell Chaos from within, the demon was desperate to break free. Desperate to cause it's own form of havoc. It wanted to kill, maim or at the very least, give some one a very nasty fright or a paper cut. However, the demon seemed to be fuelled with something other than it's anger. It now seemed to be reluctant in it's destruction. It seemed to crave peace and would fight to the death in order to get it. Had the power of Holy changed the demons spirit? Changed it from one of death to one of life? Impossible, it was a demon from the very bowels of hell.

He closed his red ruby eyes and allowed the demon to break free, it's wings tearing through his shoulder blades and spreading. His long dark hair receded back into his scalp which was turning the dark greyish purple which was the colour of skin for Chaos. His hands turned into the clawed fingers of the demon.

__

Where are my enemies? I see none before me…

Chaos waited for Vincent's answer, the master was silent. The demon took slow deep breath, hovering above the floor as it's wings flapped slowly. None of the other demons spoke up. They feared the winged one but The Master must of scared them with his sudden temper tantrum and sudden madness.

Chaos was the most intelligent of the demons, well, it knew the basics. The demon had the use of The Master's words so it could hold a conversation but didn't know what the words meant.

It knew it was living as part of a sentient life form and that it was in one body. The Master's body, was weak but when it changed into one of the demons it took on the strength of the demon. Chaos found it was alone, The Master not wanting to talk to him meant only one thing.

The Master has finally got mad or he was close to death. The Master didn't feel ill or wounded in any physical way however, the demon sensed that the human was suffering mentally from something. But what, it couldn't figure out.

Should he call one of The Master's friends? The spikey blonde one with the funny eyes and huge over sized, what the master called a butter knife, sword or the nice brunette woman with the ample chest? Perhaps the thief? The lion thing? The big loud black man or the huge white mog thing? No…he didn't really like them. They always avoided The Master and showed fear when Chaos appeared. The foul pilot that the master was rather fond of? He recalled how the pilot had offered him or The Master anyhow a place of sanctuary in his home.

Yes, the pilot would be the most ideal one of choice. Sides, Chaos also seemed to like the blonde. The blonde pilot seemed to take everything in his stride and refused to let anything get him down for long, a quality The Master admired silently.

He could contact them but found that The Master made some form of weak resistance, he didn't want the others involved. He didn't want Cid Highwind to see him as a broken man.

The demon found one drawback to it's hastily made plan. It didn't know what a call was or what was required to make the action. Oh well. 

Rampage and destruction of the mansion it was then, if only to help the master heal.

****

Hours later

Vincent fell to his knees, exhausted and tired from his bout of madness. The suddenness of the attack was frightening to him, he should never of lost his control like that. Calling Chaos had drained him more than he liked admitting, he knew he had to rest and eat. Chaos had been unwilling to show itself and had wanted nothing more than to return to it's small place in Vincent's mind but he had kept it out. He didn't want Chaos to return quite so soon.

He crawled over to the bed and lay down on the torn mattress, his red eyes filling with tears and his heart filled with an age old pain. A painful sob escaped his lips. His right flesh hand was bleeding from a cut he had received when he crawled. It stung like crazy and he looked intently at it, a small piece of wood was imbedded in his palm and he made no effort to remove it.

He wanted nothing more than to be held in someone's arms, he wanted nothing more than to be loved.

His life had been filled with so much pain and hurt, all he wanted was someone to call him theirs and them his. His stomach growled and gave hunger pains that made him curl up even further. There was no food in the mansion and only Chaos had the stomach to kill the local monsters and devour it.

The ex-Turk pulled some torn covers over him, trying to retain some heat in him, he shivered and held in a sob. What the hell had came over him? Had he really just destroyed the mansion? He couldn't clearly recall what exactly happened but he knew that he had lost control. His mind grasped feebly for some answers but found he didn't want them. He pushed away any thoughts that tried to invade his mind.

He heard Chaos tut gently inside his head, it managed a soft sigh.

__

Master what is wrong? Why did you lose control? Why did you intend on harming the innocent? I do not understand as to why you have done this. We do not understand.

Vincent laughed out loud, the very thought was comical. Why had he wanted to harm the innocent? There was no innocents on the planet. Everyone was guilty of some crime against humanity. Hojo was responsible for his pain, for his beloved pains, for the pains of Sephiroth. Hojo was the one who brought madness to the world and had sought to control what he wanted. Besides, he was a Turk after all. It's what he did. He made the innocent suffer by taking all that they loved away from them and by killing those that stood in the way of the Shin-Ra.

Hojo was a very twisted man who, in Vincent's eyes, deserved to die. What made it sweeter was that Vincent had been the one to deliver the final shot that ended the despicable life of the scientist. The ex-Turk had thought his revenge was complete, that he could regain some of his life back but only found an emptiness that seemed to span the length of his soul.

It seemed Hojo had really killed him but then one man had placed a hand on his shoulder and offered him a grin. A cigarette hanging from his lips and goggles perched on his head.

__

"The fucker's finally gone. Now we can rest a bit easy," the captain had said, he didn't fully understand that for Vincent it could never be over. During the thirty years of sleep, he had developed a damn nasty streak to him and he wanted nothing more than to rip Hojo's heart out and show it to the scientist as he once did to him. The only reason he hadn't done it was because he was with two people who were used to seeing him a picture of sanity yet there was a nagging doubt in Vincent's mind that Cid thought otherwise.

"No…we have to kill Sephiroth," was all Vincent muttered.

The captain had turned to Cloud Strife, the leader of the group for an idea as to where next and found Cloud staring at the cannon. It seemed even Cloud was at a lose for the next stage of action.

The pilot shrugged and took a thoughtful puff of his smoke, "Well, I dunno bout ya'll but I'm headin back to the ship. Ain't nothing more we can do here."

Vincent found his voice again, "Back to the ship? We have just seen the fall of a…great scientist."

The words had tasted like lead and poison on his tongue as he said them but Cid had again, brushed off the comment.

"Seen the fall of a fucking crackpot. Now, as ya said, we have to kill Sephiroth. We gotta save the fucking world from that man's mistake," Cid looked him directly in the eye.

"Sephiroth was never a mistake," Vincent felt his blood boil at the comment. How dare the pilot comment one what he had no right on. He had no real knowledge of what Sephiroth was or how he came to be. Sephiroth needed to be stopped yes, but killing him? No, that was too extreme.

"Didn't say that but, I ain't going to stand around and mourn for some crazy fuck who I helped kill. You, of all people, shouldn't be talking like ya lost your best friend. Hojo held you hostage for thirty years and now your finally free of him, don't waste your freedom by mourning him," Cid shrugged, he looked over to where the sister ray's cannon ended. Cloud was staring into the distance, a look of determination etched on his young features.

"Spike's got a plan I think," Cid said.

"I'm not mourning him," Vincent sounded like he was pleading with Cid, trying to convince the pilot he wasn't sad over Hojo's demise.

Cid stared a long moment at Hojo's body, "It's not me who ya should be trying to convince. Look, if ya want, I'll stay here with ya until you've said what ya have to. Don't let it boil inside ya. It sure as hell ain't healthy." 

Vincent focused on the thought of Cid, the pilot had always seemed to be so cheerful and optimistic. Even when the team had returned from space and had been at a loss as to what they should do, he had given them a speech that moved even him. The planet was a sick little kid and they should try and help it. They had rescued it but now what did the heroes have to fight for? What did he fight for? Tifa and Cloud had each other and would start a new life together but the ex-Turk didn't hold out much hope for them. Tifa would always be living in Aeris' shadow. Yuffie would return home with all the materia she'd gathered from her long journey. Barret would finally be a father to his little girl, Cait Sith, or Reeve would be planning on how to create a better world now that he was in charge. Red XIII or Nanaki would return back to Cosmo Canyon to protect it.

He wondered what new project the pilot would turn his ever abundant energy to? The man had seemed to be withdrawn and depressed when they had left each other, his blue eyes were filled with uncertainty and some hurt. Was the pilot sad because they were splitting up or because he was leaving them? Perhaps it was because he no longer had a reason to fight either?

He had offered Vincent a place to stay whenever he needed and help when he required it. He had even offered him the usage of the Highwind, the pilot's own pride and joy. Vincent had noted that the younger man hadn't offered or extended the offer to the other members, he simply said 'see ya later', perhaps he should take him up on the offer? He should not be left to his own devices but he couldn't be trusted with live people either. He should remain in the mansion, he should go back to sleep in his coffin.

Yes, that would be better for all concerned. 

Wouldn't it?

****

Rocket town a few days later

Cid sat outside in the yard, his blue eyes looking at the mountains again. He'd done nothing but stare at them, his mind would wander over to the reactor and how Sephiroth had gone nuts five years back. He'd heard the rumours flying around at the time and suddenly the thought struck him.

That's why he'd been pulled from the space program for the best part of a month, he had never been ordered to the town but he had been ordered to fly the 'cargo' of whatever it was to Junon. The stuff had been delivered to the sleepy town and he'd been told not to question what was in them. Had they been the residents of the town or was one of the crates Jenova? Had he played a part in the death of the innocent?

The thought made his blood run cold, he could of refused the mission but he was the only nearest highest ranking pilot in the area with top level security passes and plus, he loved to fly.

He slid further down in his chair and almost cried out, life was not going to be easy for any of them now. The planet's way of life had been altered, Shin-Ra had been defeated and now it didn't suck up the life force of the planet but when Aeris Gainsborough had died on the alter, something of the pilot had gone too. He had grown up the very instant she fell and had seen the sneer of the man who had killed her. Gone was his lazy days of just sitting on the Bronco or dreaming of space flight. Hello to a lifetime of nightmares and a new way of life.

He frowned, why was he thinking about this now? What he wouldn't give just to be his usual selfish self. Could life really be this fucking sucky?

Deep inside he knew, he had never had to face up to anything in his life and he had been told a few home truths when he joined AVALANCHE. They didn't care that he was a damn good pilot or about his dreams of space flight. They cared for the safety of the planet but it had taken him to actually leave the planet to understand how precious the seemingly insignificant sphere was.

"Captain? How long have you been sitting outside for?" Shera sat beside him on the bench. She handed him a cup of tea and watched him carefully. It seemed like he was losing a lot of weight, it scared Shera something awful.

Cid shrugged, he remembered it was still very early but he was still living in AVALANCHE time. Going to bed when it was dark and awaking a few hours later to keep ahead of the evil Shin-Ra, some nights the pilot hadn't dozed off and stayed awake with the forever awake Vincent. They wouldn't speak but they would just sit and contemplate their role in AVALANCHE and would move when one started to doze off.

The morning was turning out to be quiet nice but the Nibel mountain range still had the mist. The sun was halfway up the sky and was being covered by some rain clouds. He wouldn't of thought anything of it but for a while back, he was used to seeing the huge form of Meteor hanging in it. A fiery red bloodstain in his blue sky.

Shera felt her heart fill with concern. Cid had barely spoke to her the past few days. He'd wake up really early and then return back to bed really late. His meals would sit untouched and his tea would sit for hours barely touched. She had laid in her room and listened as the pilot would sometimes wake with a scream of horror. It was always the same name he would cry out, Aeris. The very lovely young woman who had came to the town with Cloud. Cid had told her a lot about the small group when he had came home for one night. Whenever she ran into his room, he'd brush her off with a swear or mutter that he didn't need a damn wet nurse but that didn't stop him from letting her stay though, until he dozed off again.

The airship he was so fond of had sat for the past few days without her captain venturing near her. To Shera, when Cid looked at the ship, he would shudder and retreat back into the house. The battered form of the once great airship cast a long shadow on the house, making the yard feel cold and uninviting to all those who'd stopped by. She needed the love of her creator and all she was getting was the cold shoulder. Shera had thought about doing her up herself but didn't want to start on the airship without Cid's say so. The airship was his child after all.

What had happened to her captain?

"Captain?"

Cid sighed, he slumped forward and crossed his arms. A dark look crossing his face, the woman beside him recognized the look. It was the same one he had when he had returned from the failed rocket launch and he had sat outside for hours, staring at the tilting machine. He'd been so near the edge of darkness that it was scary. Was he now falling even deeper into the hole of hate he'd tried to climb out of?

Now he was forever staring at the creepy mountains of Nibel. As if watching and waiting for some long forgotten evil to arise, with the same intent stare. Was he trying to figure things out or was he just daring them to make the wrong move? 

"Captain…?" Shera repeated, she tried to catch his attention by waving a hand in front of him, it worked. A deep part of her wanted him to mutter an obscenity at her but she buried that feeling. No longer would she be made to fell like she was a second class citizen but if he wouldn't even register her presence… 

"Huh? Oh, sorry. You said something?" Cid sounded like she'd woke him up, he returned his gaze to Nibel and stood up, "Look, I'm going out for a bit. Don't stay up."

"Where are you going?" Shera remained seated but she wanted to go with him. To keep an eye on him.

"Somewhere that isn't here…" the words weren't filled with hate, they had sadness tinged throughout. 

"Cap…Cid, what is wrong with you?"

Shera watched as he walked away from her, his shoulders slating at the ground and his head lowered. 

Cid turned round briefly, "Nothing…I just need a little breathing space that's all."

This was not her captain. Who was this impostor? It was definitely not her friend or the mayor of Rocket Town but, he was the one who had returned. 

Cid stopped when he reached the Tiny Bronco, did he really wanna fly her across the mountains? She didn't cut a scary figure but she could handle the winds better and the Highwind was a no go anyway. Her engines needed to be replaced and various parts of her hull repaired where'd she'd been ripped at by the jagged rock at the North Crater. Escaping from the centre of the planet had been more of a challenge than actually going down and killing Sephiroth. It had tested his piloting skills to the limit and he was surprised as to how well the ship had handled during the madness. Though it hadn't stopped Yuffie from chucking her cargo all over his ship. 

He smiled faintly as he recalled the first thing he'd done when he landed the Highwind and walked off her. He had stood for a few moments, shaking in shock.

It took all his strength to even walk unaided. Vincent had remained close by his side though, gently placing a hand on the pilot's lower back when Cid would veer a little too much to one side.

He felt like he'd stopped the train at Corel from crashing into the small town. His heart had pounded like a jack hammer for the rest of the day. He had stood and looked like a class idiot but not before he chucked his load over the flight deck of Junon, much to everyone's surprise. The pilot had missed Yuffie by a few feet and found that he had never really spoken to her about her travel sickness or about anything. Vincent had stood beside and steadied him as he continued to throw up, the pilot had never been sick in his entire life after a flight but Vincent had merely explained to everyone that the pilot had drank a lot of coffee and was coming down from the caffeine induced high and being banged about in a flying death contraption like a pinball was enough to make even the strongest men lose their lunch.

He missed the whole adrenaline pumping roller coaster ride of the past month. He even missed the rest of AVALANCHE, it was weird not waking up to see at least one of their faces. Well, maybe not all of their faces but he'd miss them anyway. He wanted to hear Yuffie retching as he banked the Highwind or the wet cat smell of Red XII when they had crashed into the ocean and further baths the team thought he needed during one of the lighter filled moods of the team. The curse words he and Barrett flung at each other when the pair got into one of their fights or the way Tifa could cook. He wondered if he put on a few pounds because of the meals, nothing fancy or anything but they were better than nothing and he was always eating them. He didn't want to hang with Cloud, he just couldn't find anything that he actually liked about the small ex-Soldier. He was just to damn arrogant.

Reeve or the huge white mog Cait Sith, there was a guy who had missed his calling as a gypsy or as a really bad fortune teller but one of his predictions had came true. For Cloud any how, the fortune had read, 'what you seek shall be yours but you will lose something dear.' Cid had avoided the mog about the fortunes, the pilot had figured he'd get, 'reach for the stars.'

The team had lost a very dear friend, Aries when the bastard Sephiroth ran her threw like a knife through butter. Cid had stood paralysed with Vincent as the silver haired monster fell to the alter. Cloud looked like he was battling with the same feelings as well.

Cid pushed the feelings and thoughts out of his head, what was done was done. He had been upset when Cloud gave Aeris her watery gave, he hadn't cried through. He avoided looking at the young woman's serene face and he would swear to his dying breath that she was smiling. Like she knew what was going to occur.

She'd talked to him before she left, her whole attitude one of peace and love. She spoke about next time or later a lot. She said she wanted to take a ride in the huge airship and she wanted to see the Cosmo Canyon at sunrise. He simply smiled and said he'd see what he could do.

The pilot jumped into the small plane and started her up, the engines purred but then spluttered. The thought struck him, the Bronco's engines had been shot as he had escaped with Cloud and the others. He'd take the car then.

__

Take the car to fucking where? You even know where ya heading? Cid heard the perfectly reasonable voice of his brain kick in.

__

Yep, I think Nibelhiem. Gonna crash Vincent, he's great for dealing with depressing thoughts. I mean, we are mates after all.

****

Nibelheiem

He heard a car draw upside the mansion and leapt up. His long hair hung wildly and his eyes darted madly about the mansion's master bedroom. Vincent Valentine had well and truly flipped.

He crawled along the floor like a wild animal, just wanting to leap on the next living thing that stepped through the door. He stopped as he watched his metal hand glinted in the dark light, his deranged brain made him laugh. It echoed in the empty house.

The stairs seemed to be never ending and stretched all the way down. Could someone really be bothered to come and visit him? The really freaky Vincent Valentine? Nah, why would they?

He heard the door open and he leapt up. 

Ah! Lunch is served!

He listened patiently as the person entered the mansion, the steps were light and slow. It seemed as though the visitor seemed pretty cautious of the mansion.

Cid walked slowly in, he hated how his footsteps echoed in the large lobby. It would alert any freaky thing in the place that he was in. He really didn't know as to why he came. Something had pushed him and he was the first to admit that he didn't have a clue as to what. He did things for a reason but what that reason was, he couldn't fathom.

Something had dragged his ass there and he had simply followed the instinct. He pondered the feeling as he walked into the place, the very house freaked him out. Why would any sane man live in a house like this? It was enough to drive you insane.

Or in the case of Sephiroth, drive you up the wall, round the bend and then all around the damn solar system.

"Vincent? Ya in?" he smiled at the really awful attempt at humour. 

Of course the dark man would be in, he wouldn't exactly be having a suntan now would he?

He froze as the floor boards creaked above his head, something or someone was in. Whether it was Vincent was another question. The pilot moved to the stairs and tugged on his jacket, he really hated the mansion. 

This was his first time in the run down place. He only knew second hand as to what horrors it held. 

His footsteps became muffled as he walked on the heavy old carpeting of the stairs, the place must've been impressive when it was first built. All the brass buttons looking real nice and the silver all polished and the carpets still vibrant with their deep colours. Now it looked run down and obsolete.

Just like it's owners, who were now dead.

Why had he left the safety of his home town and walk right into devil's country? The entire town reeked of Mako and death of the loss of loved ones. The entire town was in mourning and it looked like it wasn't going to end soon. Nibelhiem was the village of the damn. Forever stuck in it's painful past. The future wouldn't be welcomed in the town.

His heart raced as he took every slow step, the creaking he'd heard was getting louder and nearer, something knew he was here and was coming straight for him.

He held his breath and willed his heart to stop thundering in his ears. He'd been through scarier stuff than this in the past few days but somehow, this was even scarier than facing Sephiroth. He at least knew what to expect with the alien half breed. In this mansion, who knew what interesting little side experiments Hojo had the gaggle of scientists that worked for him had created.

Vincent kept his thin body close to the ground, hoping his meal hadn't heard him come crawling.

None of his thoughts made any sense to him, it no longer mattered. He was what Hojo wanted him to be. A monster. Devoid of feelings, devoid of love and all it took was to leave and re-enter the mansion.

No one could love him.

Not even the devil himself.

He sniffed the air and a faint memory sprang in his head, smoke…from a cigarette?

An image of a blonde pilot snapped into focus but he quickly pushed it down. No! that was the old Vincent. He no longer existed. Hadn't done for a long time.

He heard the meal speak, "Vincent, ya in?"

Again it chuckled low, _Oh no! no one is home my friend. Absolutely no one is home. Trust me._

It crept closer and came a few feet away from the meal. it looked like he hadn't spotted the monster coming to his side. Wouldn't get a chance to either, if it had a choice.

A powerful yet tender voice filled the inside of his mind, it made him freeze in terror.

__

STOP! This is not you master. You are sick, you shall rest and recoup your strength. You need to mourn and allow your pain to show through the mask and the madness. I will not allow you to destroy yourself, you are not the only being trapped in this form.

NO! I AM NOT SICK! THIS IS ME! Vincent screamed back at the voice, his form trembling in rage, _I AM A MONSTER!_

The voice of Chaos seemed almost loving, a change from the death loving being Vincent thought it as, _you are no monster. You are one of the innocents who were wronged._

Doubt filled his mind, was he? Was he one of the innocents? Was he innocent? No, he deserved this punishment Hojo had created for him.

He pushed Chaos back down with great effort and howled loudly as the great demon fought for a way back up. It seemed the winged demon wasn't finished talking to the master. The meal span round to face him, a look of panic, disgust and confusion spread over his features. The cigarette that hung from it's mouth fell from it's lips as it took a few steps away from him.

"Holy shit Vincent! The hell is fucking with ya?!" Cid's voice cracked with worry and surprise.

His friend was certainly a sight to see. The normally neat and prim man was certainly not his usual self. The man's long dark hair was wild and his red eyes looked mad. His friend lay close to the floor like an animal ready to pounce on it's prey. The pilot could the feeling of dread creep into his stomach, was his friend going to attack him?!

He didn't have much time to ponder the thought as he was pushed violently back down the stairs. He rolled as much as much as he could, trying to put into practise all those close combat training classes the Shin-Ra deemed necessary for all SOLDIER members and he tried to keep his friend from both trying to kill themselves. He grunted in pain as his body bounced off the stairs, his mind started to go dizzy as the world went by really fast. All the while his friend was trying to rip the skin from his hide, something in the man had snapped. Had Chaos gotten control? No…if Chaos had then he would know it.

He felt his head crack against the cold floor of the lobby and cried out in pain. The pilot turned his head to see Vincent sprawled across the floor beside, out for the count. 

__

Fuck was that all about? Cid thought as he closed his eyes.

****

Hours later

The world slowly blurred into focus. His head pounded and his entire body hurt like he'd just went a few rounds with the entire elite of Soldier and did at least three retakes of it.

What had he done? He had attacked one of his friends and had probably killed him in a bout of madness. He'd managed to kill all those he cared about, Lucrecia, Sephiroth…alright, not so much cared about Sephiroth.

Cid lay a few feet away from him, laying on his back and out for the count. His goggles where askew and his smokes were scattered across the floor, he made a feeble move but then stopped.

"Cid…? Are…are you ok?" Vincent rolled over to face him properly, afraid of the response.

The pilot muttered something, it seemed he was awake but not for talking. The ex-Turk couldn't blame him, if he was the pilot, he wouldn't.

"When was the last time ya played leap fucking frog? Ya don't play it on stairs you fucking idiot," Cid covered his eyes with one of his arms and moaned. The pilot must of felt strong enough to try cracking a joke.

"I'm sorry…I…" Vincent felt a sob in the back of his throat, he wanted nothing more than to cry in his friend's arms but knew the action would not go down to well. Cid would stiffen when you even mentioned hugging and he had just tried to kill the pilot by trying to tear his skin off.

Cid rolled onto his stomach and gazed at his friend, what the hell had happened in just under a week? Could someone really lose it that fast? Well, he'd just take the ex-Turk home with him and get a good Shera cooked meal in him. 

"Let's not talk," Cid rested his head on his forearms, "I'm seein' stars."

Vincent simply lay still, trying to regain some of his sanity and to control his sobs. He flexed his metal claw hand, it still worked. His right hand throbbed in a dull pain and blood trickled out from the wound on it.

"I feel…as though I have to…say," Vincent whispered softly but he was interrupted by the pilot.

"No ya don't…just don't do it again," Cid kept his head on his arms. He slowly lifted it, "Come on…Let's head back to Rocket Town."

__

Rocket Town…I can't. If I go then how on earth can I deal with my demons? Vincent made a move to decline but something made him stop.

Chaos rolled it's eyes mentally, _How can you deal with your demons? What about us? You're the one who has the issues right now!_

The blonde pilot sat up, he looked around and spotted his goggles and smokes. He leaned over and grabbed the nearest one, which was the goggles and pulled them on. The house had gotten darker since he'd been there, checking his watch he discovered it was a good few hours since he'd arrived. Shera was probably worried sick.

He stood up slowly, allowing the lobby to stop spinning round like a carousel before he made a move to reach for his smokes.

"Get your ass up boy and uh…brush your hair," Cid ordered the dark man laying at his feet, he offered a gloved hand and was pleased when Vincent took it.

"I'm old enough to…be your…father," Vincent reminded the younger blonde. He found that his spirits were a little lighter since the blonde had arrived but not enough to make him forget that he'd tried to kill the pilot.

Cid muttered something under his breath, hoping the older man wouldn't hear but Vincent did.

"Yeah…he tried to kill me to."

****

Rocket Town

Shera tidied the kitchen up quickly and quietly. The house work had taken her a few minutes to do when usually it would take a few hours to get the place round squarely. The fact Cid wasn't touching any of the mechanical devices in the house contributed a lot to the fact and the house wasn't cluttered by engine parts.

She was worried about the mayor of Rocket Town, ever since he came home he wasn't himself. It was if someone had transplanted the vibrant personality of the captain with a sombre and dull one. It made her wonder about what had occurred down in the planet's centre. What horrors had he seen? 

She sat down in the kitchen and placed a hand to her stomach, pregnancy was not going to go down well with the captain right now. She'd been hiding it for the past month but knew it would be long until she wasn't able to hid it. The young woman had her doubts as to whether or not the pilot knew. Rocket Town was a small place and everyone knew everyone's business, no matter how quiet you were. The more quiet you where the more gossip that was spread or created just for you.

Much to everyone's disbelief, the two had gotten into a relationship a few months back. They still fought but it meant that it wasn't as bad as it once was. The relationship however started under a bad cloud. The pair had gotten drunk and slept with each other. Shera had thought it was a turning point but after the incident Cid had became even more distant and angry to her. Everyone in the town had said that the infamous pilot battered the engineer and that he was the control freak. He wasn't. The pilot had never laid a hand on the woman and had once said that he would rather cut his hands off than use them to strike a woman. 

Once, a few days after the failed launch, Shera had gotten herself rather tipsy at the local inn and had came home. She had attracted the attention of one of the lecherous villagers and he had attempted to be her companion for the night. She had suffered a few bruises and scrapes as she fought him off and had ran home, tears streaming and clearly upset. Cid had been up late again, working on the _Tiny Bronco _and had heard her come crashing in. He was ready for hurling a barrage of insults at her for coming in late but he had saw the mess she was in and after cleaning her up had went out to have a few words with the townsperson who had down that to her and had ended up in the local jail for the best part of two weeks. He had said nothing to her as he had came home apart from asking if she was okay. The pilot hadn't always been a monster to her but he was hurt from having his dreams so near to being complete and yet only to have them die a fiery death.

She also knew that Cid couldn't deny that it was his, she had only slept with him and she had a feeling that she was one of the few women the captain had slept with. Even though Cid had bragged about his sexual exploits, he was always running from woman and had never been in a relationship any longer than a week or the longest had been a whole month. Shera could count how many times Cid had slept with woman on one hand and about the same for how many relationships he's had.

"What happened to us captain? We used to be so happy," Shera sighed, did she really want the answer to that question? Probably not but It didn't stop her from asking it quietly.

She brought her dark brown eyes to the clock that hung above the door, the woman had always thought that it was a crazy place to put a clock but Cid had been adamant about where it was placed. She had asked him why and he shrugged, saying 'why the hell not?'

The phone rang, making her jump. It was late in Rocket Town, just passing 11 at night but it could be one of the captain's friends. Calling to see if he got home safe or perhaps to arrange a reunion.

She walked over to it, hoping that it wouldn't stop by the time she got there, it didn't.

"Hello?"

__

"Shera, it's me. Cid," the caller identified himself, relief ran through her shapely form as she listened to his voice.

"Captain, where are you? Are you alright?" Shera had to stop herself from becoming over protective and motherly.

__

"Yeah…need a favour though," the captain asked, _"Think you could do it for me?"_

Shera smiled, "Of course captain. You don't have to ask. What is it?"

__

"Need ya to come pick me and Vinny up," the captain's voice had a smile on it, obviously he was feeling better.

Her mind went blank for a second as she tried to recall who 'Vinny' was. Cid hadn't spoken much about his fellow heroes sinse he got home and she had only met them a few times before hand and didn't really catch all of their names.

__

"I'll explain it to ya when we get home, also, could ya grab some first aid kit outta the house cause…me and Vinny was attacked by something," Cid seemed to be reluctant in saying what had attacked them but the fact that they were both alive meant it wasn't anything serious.

"Of course," Shera nodded. She knew he couldn't see the action but it was habit, "Where do I collect you two, captain?"

__

"Nibelheim, you'll see my car. I'll deal with that later…and shera?" Cid paused, waiting for Shera's answer.

"Yes?"

__

"One other favour…call me Cid. It's my first name and it's only right that you call me that as you're my friend and all," Cid laughed, _"Thanks darling."_

Shera had to smile as she hung up the phone, she was relieved that her captain was finally better but there was a nagging thought in her head. It could be the calm before the storm. 

****

Nibelhiem

The rain pounded heavily onto the street, turning the ground into mud or making it slippy. The mountains, if one looked, looked evil and uninviting to everyone. No sane villager would be out in the weather, no sane traveller would be either. However, many of the residents of Rocket Town, would proclaim that Cid Highwind, was not sane.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" Cid Highwind swore for the hundredth time as he tried to walk across the street to the inn. Shera had called him minutes before saying that she couldn't make it, the weather had gotten terrible and a dense mist had fallen over Rocket Town and the area surrounding the town. It wasn't that unusual, the mountain's made that happen, so Cid had decided to go and attempt to drive home, only to find the car had been water logged by the falling rain. He had spent a few minutes kicking the vehicle, spouting out all the curse words he knew in a vain attempt a getting the car to work.

Vincent, hopefully was resting in the inn. The guy looked terrible to the pilot, not his usual self but Cid wasn't sure what that was for the man. Cid had decided to take him home with him only because he didn't want the ex-Turk doing something stupid. He didn't want one of his few friends trying suicide.

If the best pilot on the planet had to be honest, he hated this town. He hated everything about it. The mansion deserved to be destroyed, as soon as the _Highwind _or the _Bronco_ was up and running, he'd drop a bomb on the house. Hell, he'd torch the place himself or something but Vincent had done a good start up job of tearing the place down himself.

He fell to his backside as he lost his footing. He landed with a thud in the cold, wet slimy mud and swore loudly. His voice echoing in the silent town. A few dogs barked when they heard him swear.

"SHIT!" he slammed his fist into the mud, making it splash everywhere and cover him further in the slimy substance.

He contemplated just laying in the mud but he was in his favourite flight jacket and besides, his smokes were getting wet. Slipping as he attempted to get up, the pilot kept swearing to the gods of rain, making idle threats that the minute he was up in the skies, he'd find and kick the crap out of him. 

__

Yeah…like the weathers a real guy, his mind scolded him.

He walked to the inn, dripping wet and covered with mud. Cid rolled his eyes as he got funny looks from everyone as he walked into the inn. The receptionist gave him a disgusted look.

"Can I help you?"

"No, I've got a fucking room here already," Cid swore at the woman, his mood darkening with each step he took up the stairs. His boots left a trail of mud behind him but he really wasn't that fussed as to the noises of annoyance the woman was making behind him. The way he saw it was that he was keeping the cleaners in a job.

He searched through his many pockets to look for the key to the room, he'd locked it to keep Vincent safe or was he doing it to keep the stupid villagers safe? No, it was to keep Vincent safe, he didn't want the man to be awoken by housekeeping. He needed all the rest he could get.

After what seemed like a lifetime, he gave up searching for the key, it must of fell out when he'd slipped into the mud puddle. Swearing seemed like a good idea for a few minutes.

"The fuck can't I keep a simple fucking key in a safe place? I mean, ask me to look for huge fucking materia or the key to the temple of the ancients and I'll give them to you in a matter of fucking minutes but ask me to look for a key! Fucking asshole!" Cid ranted, he wasn't that fussed as to who heard but an old gentleman peered out of his room to the captain.

"Excuse me son, but could you please be quiet. Some of us are not as young as we used to be," the gentleman said.

Cid stuck the middle finger at him, "Screw you old man."

The old man went back into his room, muttering something about the youth of today not having enough respect for the elders of the world.

He waited a few moments before finally and reluctantly knocking on the door. He wasn't wanting to wake the younger…or older man. He needed his rest but Cid needed to get a fresh change of clothes and home as soon as possible but at the very least, clean himself up.

He waited a few moments before knocking again, the ex-Turk must be sleeping. That was a good thing, wasn't it?

He placed his hands on his hips and rubbed his eyes, his head was beginning to pound. He'd never been to fond of rain as it made flying treacherous.

"Vincent…wake up for a few minutes will ya? Open the fuckin' door," he muttered softly.

Seconds passed and the door opened slowly, Vincent appeared in the doorway. The ex-Turk looked far too pale and weak to stand.

Vincent said nothing as he stepped back, he raised an eyebrow when he saw his friend's mud covered form. Various insults went through his head but figured that the pilot would probably have a good few retorts.

Cid slipped into the room, "Don't say a damn word. I slipped and fell."

Vincent said nothing but a faint smile played on his lips, he felt his shoulder grow cold as his shirt slipped off it. He felt to weary to move and return it back to it's rightful place. Cid rolled his blue eyes and slowly walked over to him, a small friendly smile gracing his features.

"Fuck we gonna do with ya Vincent?" Cid pulled the shirt back to his shoulder, "The car's kinda waterlogged so we're stuck in here."

Vincent sighed, "Thank you my friend."

Thunder roared outside and the rain fell on the roof, filling the silence that had fallen over the room. Cid turned away from the ex-Turk, he pulled out a cigarette from the pack on his head and sparked it up.

"For what?"

Vincent sat on the bed, it was still warm from where he was sleeping and he was so very tempted just to curl up back into it, "For what? For being…for coming to my rescue."

Cid said nothing as he walked to the large window, _Coming to the rescue? Nah, he's still a bit bumped and his head is probably still spinning._

Vincent felt awkward as he watched his friend stand silently at the window, had he said something to offend him?

He decided to change the subject, "Why did you come to Nibelhiem? The towns people aren't driving you crazy are they? How is Shera?"

Cid tensed at the name Shera, he'd been a complete jerk to her since he got back, ignoring her and he had to try hard not to fall back into the hurtful name calling.

"Shera's pregnant," he finally said the words.

A sharp intake of breath was all Vincent managed to make, "Preg…she's going to have a child?"

"Usually meant by the term pregnancy. She thinks I don't know but when a chick runs to the bathroom every morning," Cid sounded like he was going through his own thoughts, trying to clear and give them an airing, "It usually means a sprog's on the way. Either that or I cooked something."

Vincent smiled at the memory. Cid had cooked or rather attempted to cook breakfast for the team when Tifa had left to care for Cloud in Mideel and had failed fantastically. The meal had stuck to the pot and no one, not even the cook knew what the blazes it was supposed to look or even be.

"Anyway, Rocket Town is a damn small town, the old fish wives just love talking about things that will stir up trouble," Cid had brought the older man out of his thoughts, "They delighted in telling me."

"Who's the father?"

"Looking at him," Cid remained at the window and peeled off his muddy flight jacket.

"Congratulations," Vincent offered, his thought as to what Cid would do with his energy now. Fatherhood and more than likely, marriage.

Cid didn't seem to be to happy with the idea of Shera being pregnant, "Yeah…thanks."

__

He doesn't seem to want the pregnancy does he? Chaos spoke up, at the moment, Vincent was amazed at how perceptive the demon was at guessing human feelings.

"You don't seem to be overjoyed at the idea of fatherhood," Vincent looked around the inn room, it hadn't changed since he last came here over thirty years ago.

Cid sat heavily down on the other bed and pulled of his boots, swearing at how muddy they were. He was trying to break the weird feeling that had fallen over the two. He shrugged mentally, why was he freaking out like this? He'd been through life and death with this guy and here he was, acting like a nervous date.

"It's been over thirty years since I last came here…still the same wall paper and the same hideous spreadsheets for the beds," Vincent felt a wave of dizziness wash over him, it was the same one that had took him before the madness. His body burned with a new fever that he hadn't felt before.

Cid leaned forward and placed a hand on Vincent's knee, "Ya alright there partner?"

Vincent nodded slowly, hoping whatever madness had claimed him back at the mansion would not claim him again, it could spell the end for his friend Cid and the people of Rocket Town.

The pilot frowned, clearly not convinced about his best friend's admittance of wellness, "Yeah well, if your fine and fucking dandy then strap a tutu on my ass and call me fucking Priscilla."

Vincent smiled as he recalled the image of the sweet young child who had a crush Cloud. He had to laugh at the image of Cid in the said tutu and likening himself to the girl. The pink skin tight leotard and the fluffy ruffle skirt around his waist. The clinching thought was having the ever present cigarette in his mouth and the flight goggles strapped to his head. 

"What's so fucking funny?" as much as he hated people laughing at him, he found he was relieved at the smile. It meant Vincent was slowly returning to his normal self.

"Nothing Priscilla," Vincent fell back on the bed, rolling his eyes as the bed was still as hard as he reminded.

Cid rolled his eyes and stood up, "Gotta strap a tutu on ma ass before ya call me that, Vicki."

"Give me a few moments and I will attempt to endeavour on that task," Vincent closed his eyes as he heard his friend hit the shower. He was sure that like the remark in the mansion, it wasn't meant to be heard but it filled his heart with some form of warmth.

"Well, it wouldn't be that fucking hard."

****

Later that night

Cid sat at the window and peered into the darkness and at the mansion, the building looked pure evil and in no way did it make him feel any more comfortable. He took a swig of the hour old beer he had and looked over to where Vincent was sleeping on the bed.

The pilot had mulled over the problems of the dark man since he'd fallen asleep. Something in the man's mind had snapped and it was clear that Vincent was struggling to regain some control.

__

So, what happened back in the damn mansion? Maybe I should go check it out, Cid flexed his foot, he toyed with his lighter and shrugged.

"Well, I 'pose I could always go and check it out," he muttered.

Cid gingerly stood up, he knew Vincent was a light sleeper but hopefully the bottle of booze he'd poured down his throat had knocked the ex-Turk out. His boots were sitting at the door, covered in mud. A thought crossed his mind, he really should get a new pair of boots. Those ones were older than the _Highwind_. They were so comfy though.

He headed to the door and but a sharp cry from Vincent made him turn round. The ex-Turk was sitting up on the bed, wide eyed and looking totally petrified. Cid leapt over to him, he tripped over his own feet and he fell flat on his face. He blamed himself for having a few too many beers.

Vincent clawed at the bed covers, the same look of panic was etched on his pale delicate face. His dark red eyes filled with pain and fear. It looked like his nightmares were returning in full force.

Cid sat up and crawled over to the bed, the pilot felt unsure at how he should react or even try to comfort the man. He edged as near as he could, he didn't want a repeat of the mansion incident again.

"Vincent…? Hey, hey, ya okay?" Cid whispered, he slowly extended his arm and placed his gloveless hand on Vincent's shoulder.

Vincent reacted to the touch as though he'd been struck by a bolt of lighting and he scrambled away from his touch. Cid sighed, he swore on his life that when he died, he'd hunt the bastard Hojo and kill him again.

"Hey, hey, it's me. Cid Highwind," the pilot spoke gently and calmly. He remained sitting at the end of the double bed Vincent had claimed.

The ex-Turk looked at the pilot with true suspicion and pulled up the covers further, "Cid……friend? My friend…?"

"Yup, best one," Cid offered with a broad grin.

"……I…don't have any," Vincent breathed.

"Bull, you know you do. Vince, what the hell Is going on in that head of yours?" Cid edged a little closer to the ex-Turk, hoping and praying he wouldn't scoot further up on the bed.

The older man had tears welling in his eyes, a few spilled over and ran down his pale cheeks. He shook his head and let out a choked cry, "I…I……" 

Cid shook his head, he'd never been to great with people crying. It wasn't part of his tough guy image that everyone was so used to seeing on him. Shera had never seen him cry, neither had his own parents.

__

Do I really try to hug him? I mean, he might rip my fucking hand off…, the pilot pulled Vincent to him and held him tightly to his chest.

A few moments passed and Cid let out a relieved sigh when Vincent didn't kill him on the spot. The pilot felt a tentative arm go round his waist and felt the former assassin for the Shin-ra relax ever so slightly.

"Shhh," Cid whispered gently, very softly he started to stroke his friend's dark hair in an attempt to sooth him. He was surprised at just how well the action was doing. Vincent's sobs were quiet but Cid could feel them shake the frail body of his friend. 

***************

A loud constant thunder pounded in his ears. His entire right hand side was nice and warm. He vaguely recalled being scared and afraid.

Where was the thunder coming from? His mind slowly got around to thinking that it wasn't thunder, that it was something else. Something much more closer. Much more intimate.

"Wha…where is the thunder coming from?" he whispered, he kept his eyes closed and focused on the sounds. They sounded so familiar to him, so reassuring.

He felt a gentle hand stroke his long hair, the fingers delicately brushing down his neck. Vincent sighed, he remained motionless, afraid that if he moved, the motion would stop.

He spoke again, a little more strongly, "Where is the thunder coming from?"

A sleepy drawl of a voice sounded muffled and quiet, Vincent's hearing on his left side had never fully recovered after Hojo's torture. He strained to hear the words.

"Nah, it's…um…" the speaker paused and yawned, "A little…after 3 in the morning. The storm passed over a few hours back when ya were sleeping."

So he was in Cid's arms, a small smile crept over his face. The one place he wanted to be and all he had to do was go mad. He sighed with contentment and tried to cuddle more into his friend's arms. The action, he knew would be pushed aside in his friend's mind as one of trying to get warmth and not of the way it really was meant.

Vincent was almost dozing when he felt the pilot shake him gently. The action wasn't meant to fully wake him, just enough to arouse him into doing something for a short moment.

"Hey…" Cid whispered, "Think ya could shift your ass for a sec? I gotta go pee."

Vincent reluctantly sat up, his head spinning round. He attempted to stay sitting upright for as long as he could but the desire to lay back down was more stronger than ever. He obeyed the command his body was giving and found the spot were Cid had been lying and curled up into it. The warmth was enough to send him almost straight to sleep but Chaos spoke, sending a new wave of pain to his already hurting head.

__

It pleases us to see you are feeling stronger master. Perhaps you should return with your friend to his home? There he would look after you, he would not I feel, abandon you, Chaos's voice sounded so loud. It echoed in Vincent's mind.

__

Will you never shut up?! Please…I don't want you…nor do I ask for your council?! No! It's your fault I'm the way I am! Do not speak to me…when I need your aid or council, I will ask…, Vincent screamed back at Chaos, his head felt like someone had placed it in a hot vice and was very slowly squeezing.

He felt something cool being placed on his forehead and a concerned growl emitting from somewhere above him.

"Shit…burning up some fucking fever pal," Cid cursed, "How are ya feeling?"

It hurt to even speak, "Fine and…fucking dandy."

The simple statement made him smile and hurt him even more.

"We gotta get ya to a doc Vincent. There is something seriously wrong with ya…" Cid sounded concerned, "I ain't going to let ma best friend die on me."

"I'll be…fine…" Vincent rubbed his head into the pillow in a vain effort to ease the pain in his head.

Cid watched his friend, concern and anger at not being able to help him ripping his soul apart. The pilot rubbed his eyes tiredly, he shouldn't of woke him. He cursed his bladder but knew the action was futile, Vincent probably would of woken up to this in the morning.

Something in his sleep filled mind the pilot suddenly had a rational thought, who knew what shit Hojo had filled Vincent's body with. The former Turk had been placed in a stasis like form and had been pumped full of whatever Hojo had to hand. Which meant Jenova.

Jenova had protected Cloud from catching colds and had probably saved his life when he'd fallen into the Lifestream, twice. Jenova offered some amazing healing properties but it worked as part of a living organism, even when separated, it was in constant contact with the main body and that was just the cells. Perhaps by killing the main form of Jenova, they had killed the cells that resided in all other SOLDIER members and in Vincent?

The poisons that Hojo had pumped him full of was slowly coming into effect and Vincent was going to be in a hard couple of days as the shit left his frail body.

"Hey, shit, I think your either poisoned or your going into with-fucking-drawl here partner," Cid spoke after his internal debating.

"What makes you thin……think it's…" Vincent trailed off, it hurt to much to speak, every scar on his body felt like Chaos or one of the other demons with were trying to break free but he knew, in some deep part of him, they weren't.

"Well…I…ahh…shit, I was never fucking good at biology at school. I'm a fucking rocket scientist for christ sakes," Cid cursed, "If you cut the head offa something the body dies right?"

Vincent barely nodded, he had no clue as to where his friend was going with the statement but allowed him to continue.

"Could Hojo of put some Jenova cells in you? Ya know maybe to balance out the whole shit he put in you? He'd want you to live right?" Cid's voice started to fade into oblivion but a small part of Vincent understood the words.

Hojo had put Jenova in him, if he hadn't then Vincent would of died almost instantly. It had been to counteract the poisons in his body and to keep him strong enough to last through the experiments planned for him. The cells within him had either kept the poisons at bay or Vincent was going through withdrawal as a result of the cells dying or perhaps because they were being reabsorbed into his already messed up immune system.

All he wanted right now was for the numbness that Hojo once had him in, the blissful period were no pain was felt or where time had no govern. 

Vincent felt Cid's hand on his forehead, it remained there for a moment longer than it should of, if he was trying to gauge the temperature of his friend but not if it was meant as a sign of comfort as well.

He summoned up the last of his waning strength to ask a simple request of his friend, "Could you hold me?"

Cid smiled and offered a laugh, but he didn't say no. He climbed into the bed and muttered something about how this would look to anyone walking in. Cid lay beside Vincent and pulled him nearer. The bed sheets were in the middle of the bed and Cid stretched down to reach them, he wrapped Vincent up in them.

"Get some sleep and don't worry," the pilot whispered into his friend's ear, "I'll be right here when ya wake up."

__

He doesn't know how much this means to me, the words he says…they're not needed but welcomed anyway. Why is he doing the simple small actions of a lover and not a friend? Does he even know he's doing this? Vincent felt Cid's warmth radiate through the sheets. It was odd in a way, during his time with AVALANCHE Cid had been the one who had ended up in Vincent's arms. The action was never requested or spoke of but it had occurred. Perhaps the pilot did know of what he did? Cid had always treated him differently from the others but not in a bad way. Friendship to the pair had came as naturally as ducks to water.

Cid shifted slightly and started to sing something in Wutian, very softly and in key, which surprised the ex-Turk. Whenever the radio had been on in the _Highwind_ the captain would sing very badly and ham it up to no end. 

Vincent wondered were the pilot had learned Wutian from, the pilot was fluent and didn't have the annoying hold up when trying to pronounce some words. It seemed to suit the pilot although Cid had once commented to Barret that he really did only know only two types of English. Good English and the bad kind.

Vincent didn't focus on the song or the words, he simply was happy to have his friend holding him. No words were needed to communicate how safe he felt in his friend's arms, he fell asleep listening to his friend's singing and the constant sound of the heartbeat of his friend.

*************

Cid didn't get much sleep that night, his mind wandering onto every topic that sprang to his head. Even the damn silly ones, like how did they get the icing into some chocolate bars that were shaped like eggs?

The main two topics that kept hitting him straight between the eyes were Shera and the man in his arms at the moment, Vincent.

He loved Shera and was going to have a child with her but he found he had missed the ex-Turk like crazy. Did he love Vincent?

No way, that wasn't done, he was a guy and guys only go with girls. So why did holding Vincent in his arms feel so damn right? Like it was meant to be? He had never been so completely at ease with someone as much as this man right here.

"Shit," he whispered, "Trust me to get fucked up when I don't even try."

The comment hadn't woken up his sleeping friend, Cid raised his hand to his friend's forehead, hoping the fever that had burned had passed but his hope had been in vain. His hand was a few centimetres away from it and he could feel just how hot he was. It must be unbearable.

The pilot rested his head on the headboard and closed his eyes, the next few days were going to be damn hard for Vincent if it was withdrawal. It was going to be hard whatever was happening to his friend. He'd need someone he could trust and Cid had offered his services but the pilot hadn't been so sure of his own feelings before he had arrived. His mind was trying to figure out as to why he had arrived in the town. He was going to do the right thing by Shera but now this had came up. Vincent seemed to depend on him, more than what he had in AVALANCHE.

In AVALANCHE he had simply relied on him in battle to watch his back and he his. Cid had relied on him sharing a bed at night, the pilot had been mortified to wake up in Vincent's arms the first time he did it but Vincent had said nothing apart from 'good morning'. The pilot had blushed and muttered a charming choice words. 

So, what was he going to do?

In his head, he knew what he had to do. He had to stay with Vincent. The man had been there for him. Cid would live up to the name of Highwind by helping out a friend.

The sun tried to peek through the heavy curtains in the room and Cid found himself trying to snuggle further down the bed and nearer to his friend. Vincent's head was resting on his chest and the long black locks had fallen out of it's hastily made pony tail. The younger/older man had woken an hour after Cid had gently aroused him and had been ill. Violently ill. 

Cid had held his dark hair back as he threw up. He'd carried his friend back to the bed, surprised and concerned as to how light he was.

The former Turk was now settled and seemed to be very contented where he was. Now all Cid had to do was to fall asleep and rest his weary head and the pair would be good.

Sleep seemed to elude the famous hero, as it had in Rocket Town. He knew he couldn't depend on Shera soothing him when he had a bad dream, Vincent looked in no fit state to do it. The man was busy with his own nightmares.

His sky blue eyes stung in pain the longer he kept them open and his head felt like it weighed like the _Highwind._

Vincent shifted and it made the pilot look down at him.

"Morning sleepy," Cid cleared his throat, he knew he looked exhausted but he didn't care. Vincent wasn't any better looking at the moment.

"…morning…?" his friend's quiet voice barely made it to his ears. The word had vibrated on his stomach and it sent a warm gentle breath on a small spot of his tanned form.

__

Thank fuck he hasn't got dragon breath, Cid joked mentally, _or Chaos breath…that thing could bore a hole in the _Highwind's _hull if it had the urge._

"Yup, it's still early though," Cid reached to where he'd placed his wristwatch and blinked away the stinginess that had become almost annoying.

"Shit…what normal people are up at this fucking hour?"

Warm short breaths on his chest as his friend spoke, "…time is it?"

Cid rubbed his eyes and stared at the watch for a long moment, trying to figure out what time it was. His vision kept blurring so he couldn't discern whether it was 8 or 6 or hell it could even of been 5. All he knew was that it was early.

"Does it matter?" Cid replied at long last.

Vincent shook his head, "……I wish I could be like you…"

The comment made Cid snort with laughter, "Nah ya don't. I'm pretty fucked up too friend."

Vincent slowly sat up, his long hair brushed against Cid's skin. His dark red eyes searching his friend's sleepy features. 

His pale cheekbones reddened, "That was some…thing you shouldn't…of heard."

The pilot stretched out his hand and gently stroked Vincent's cheek, "Just forget it."

Vincent froze at the touch but closed his eyes. His heart leapt a thousand times more quicker than what the fever was making it. He felt his balance sway and knew better than to argue with the laws of gravity.

A small part of him marvelled at the fact that the blonde pilot wasn't pushing him away, telling him to burn in hell and was in a way, opening up to him. Had the pilot changed so much from when Vincent had first met him?

"Cid?" he whispered

"What?" the pilot replied in the same timid whisper, he removed his hand from the older man's cheek, as if he had asked.

"We're not exactly normal are we?" Vincent lay back down beside Cid, hoping Cid would replace his arm around his shoulders and rested his head on his chest. The pilot complied by placing an arm around his shoulders and the former Turk got an extra gift of the pilot pulling him a little closer to him. 

A smile played on the captain's lips, "Well, who'd be normal anyhow? It's over rated I think. I mean, life would be boring if we all had cushy jobs like Reeve. The only excitement we'd get would be if someone fell over and stubbed his toe on a letter."

"…on a letter?" Vincent frowned, was his friend saying that to get a laugh or was he still half a sleep?

The smile got a little bigger, "Yup, and tied to the letter was a highlighter. You know, those things are lethal if ya don't watch yourself."

Vincent felt his lips tug at a smile, he knew what his friend was getting at. He was trying to make him feel better by trying to prove how silly and abnormal he was. The ex-Turk decided to join in, knowing full well that Cid would carry the joke on for as long as he wanted and this would be a private joke between them.

The older man decided that he would put his opinion of lethal stationary equipment out, "It's the paper clips that worries me…they can trip you if your not careful…they work together."

Cid whispered in mock fear, "No! how do they do it?"

"They link up…" he whispered back.

Again, in the same whisper Cid spoke back, "That's what I thought…they must be stopped……quick, to the stationary cupboard! We will defeat the evil lord of paper clips and save the fair…save the fair…water cooler from marrying the dastardly…"

Vincent laughed out loud, "The dastardly photocopier!"

At that point Cid started to chuckle. One of the few genuine laughs he'd had since he had joined AVALANCHE and had saved the world. The team never really had a chance to sit and chill out. Never had a chance to exchange jokes or laugh at small things. Cid had always had a sarcastic sense of humour and the way the team thought, he was just mean. 

The pilot knew though that Vincent had just a sarcastic tone to him as well. On occasions, when Cid had commented about something with his sarcastic outlook, Cid had seen a smile grace the tall man's features and his eyes light with a distant laugh. 

Vincent lay still as he listened to his friends heart beat, it was slow and reassuring. He felt bad for yelling at the demon Chaos earlier, he was feeling better but he still felt groggy and he knew his fever still burned. Chaos was actually concerned for him, like a way a parent would be for a child. It would only speak when it felt it had to. Cid gently started to drum his finger tips on Vincent's side, the motions sent a tingling sensation on his side. 

"They talk to me, ya know?" Vincent said after a while.

Cid must have been dozing, his response was slow and sleepy, "What?"

The ex-Turk felt he had to tell someone and Cid seemed like he wasn't going anywhere soon so he'd tell him.

"Chaos and the other demons. They can talk to me," he offered.

Vincent merely got a soft snore from his pilot as a way of a response. He sighed softly but he didn't mind his friend sleeping. Cid was many things in life but very rarely did he shirk from his duty to those he cared for. He would show it in the most odd ways but everyone knew the pilot had a heart of gold.

The former Turk was actually glad that while Cloud had awoken him physically from his nightmarish slumber. The pilot, Cid, had hauled his mind and soul back into the land of the living. 

Later that day

Vincent stepped into the shower, feeling better almost instantly as he felt the hot water hit his skin. A chance to get rid of the grim and dirt that he had accumulated over the past few days. It was a small wonder that the pilot sharing the bed with him, hadn't poured a bucket of water all over him. Even he had to admit that he wasn't his fragrant smelling self and he must stink to high heavens. 

He steadied himself by placing his metal hand on the tiled shower wall, he gazed intently at it. It was a technical marvel but it was part of him. He hated it, it didn't feel like his hand any more.

Hojo had made sure that if he ever awoke, the scientist had wanted him never to feel anything again but what he wanted. To feel like a monster.

He'd caught his fellow team mates staring at the appendage and he knew the questions in their minds. Just how exactly did he get the appendage and why was he so quiet. Cid had simply pulled a face at the limb and had blasted Yuffie for staring at him.

__

"The hell are ya staring at?! It's a goddamn arm for fuck sake," the irate pilot exploded.

Vincent blushed underneath all the cowling he had wrapped around his face, why was the pilot taking so much interest in him? He had done nothing to deserve the attention that was being given to him. He didn't deserve friends.

"The man isn't some goddamn freakshow," Cid waved his hand in Vincent's general direction.

"You are going for sarcasm right?" the teen ninja shot back, "How can he not be a freakshow? He slept in a coffin for Da-chao sakes!"

The former Turk felt his cheeks burn in embarrassment and resentment but again the pilot came to his aid.

"Yuffie, I slept in a goddamn garage for the best part of two years," the pilot stalked up to the teen, he towered above her small frame, "I'm anti-social and generally cranky if I don't have my morning cup of tea. Sides, we're currently chasing a silver haired freak who claims to be heir to the damn planet. Vincent is normal compared to that guy, anyhow, you're the damn freak kid. What in god's name is a sixteen year old doing hanging around a group of adults?"

The ninja fell quiet and stared at the Highwind's _deck. She didn't have an answer to that question and probably never would have._

Why is he always defending me? Vincent thought, he ran his flesh hand through the mess that was his hair, trying to untangle the knots that had formed.

He hadn't came up with an answer then and found he still couldn't. the pilot didn't have to defend him, he hadn't needed to do half the things he had. 

__

************************

Ok? How was it? Good bad? Ok? Or a don't bother to write more? Please R&R, I'd love for some feedback on this. Also, I can promise you….I won't be doing a Aeris comeback tale. She's dead, she's gone and she's feeding the fishes. Sephiroth however…….well, he just rocks and plus, who else is gonna bug the hell out of the AVALANCHE group?

I would also like some ideas as to how to wrap up the whole Shera pregnant thing. Trust me, I've thought about killing her off but then, I kinda like her. Princess Artimess, (I'm sorry, cuz I know I've spelt her name wrong!) has done some great fics about her and Cid. I honestly don't know who the man should be with……please, please, please help me think of a way! …..the things they say about the paper clips and the office supplies….are true!!!!!!! Trust me…….the damn water machine keeps giving me electric shocks when I go for a drink at my work……….

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	2. confessions

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Squaresoft owns ff7. I dinnae.

Also, I would like to thank my first fan! THANK YOU! Loads of love is being sent to u! the fan is called Li. Thank you very much!

Every review person will be named and shamed, nah, they won't be shamed but they will get named. Lol….anyhow, on with A True valentine, part two.

A very big thanks to the lovely emerald embers, (go read her fics! There really good too! Better than mine!) she explained how they got the cream icing in the eggs! thanks to tir as well. Love you guys!

Chapter 2

Is friendship something that I can attain? Something that I don't have to feel bad about? Vincent thought as the water ran down his back, he smiled faintly as the water was warm and very pleasant.

Every small thing he did was new to him, he had none of the luxuries that this world took for granted thirty years ago. Showers were only for the rich then and now, every one who wanted one could have.

Vincent closed his eyes and raised his head to the water. His long dark hair soaked to his skull and hung to just below his scarred shoulder blades. Those wounds would never heal fully. Not as long as he had Chaos residing within him, every time he summoned the beast, it's wings would tear through the shoulder's flesh and return just as painfully. It amazed him as to how the others avoided losing there lunch when they saw him transform. 

__

It can't be a pretty sight, he thought.

Cid was still sleeping in the next room, the pilot had came to him for help but had ended up helping him. He felt bad at showing the pilot how weak he really was but he was surprised at how readily Cid was for admitting that he was just as flawed. what had surprised him more was that the blonde had held him in his arms with no hesitation or fear. What was the pilot thinking when he embraced him like that?

Vincent lost himself in his shower, finding small pleasures like the shampoo smell to focus on. Personal hygiene products had definitely gotten better last time he used them. Some of the smells were fantastic to him, he very rarely thanked Hojo for anything but the heightened sense of smell at this moment was simply fantastic. The strawberry scented soap made his mouth water and his nose tingle with the sweet smell. That was odd to him, he absolutely detested the small red fruits.

On board the _Highwind, _he'd once heard a bunch of the engineers joking about the captain. Saying that the pilot was a neat freak when it came to the airship but when it came to himself, he always looked so scruffy. Like he always rolled out of bed a few minutes before. Another had joked that if you bought the pilot a packet of smokes and could make a decent cuppa, you had a friend for life.

A few moments later Vincent decided that he'd had enough of showering and stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around his slender form. He felt light headed but the feeling passed within seconds. It must have been because he'd washed all the dirt out of his head and he was starving. 

He was surprised at how many bruises and scars they were on his lithe form. Some were old, from Hojo but a whole mess of them were from the more recent battle to save the planet. He wondered if any bruises were on the sleeping pilot in the double bed. It was something that he would enquire about later. The blonde had moaned about the amount of bruises he had gotten just trying to claw his way out of the icy cavern at Gais Cliff.

The sun tried to shine through the heavy curtains that was favoured by the Nibelhiem inn. Narrow sunbeams managed to squeeze through the cracks and cut across the dark carpeting of the room. The double bed the captain slept in was barely touched by the sunrays.

The former Turk's stomach growled in hunger, he placed his good hand on it and thoughtfully rubbed it.

"If ya can pat your fucking head while doing that, you're a genius," Cid's voice drawled. The pilot sat up on the bed and stretched out the kinks that had formed in his body. Wincing as a painful cramp started to make itself felt just above his left shoulder and slowly and very painfully make it's way up to his hand.

Vincent blushed, "I'm just a little hungry."

Cid rubbed the sleep out of his blue eyes and blinked a few times. His blonde hair sticking out all over the place, running a hand through it didn't help the style. It made him look like he'd been playing near a plug socket.

"Hungry…breakfast time isn't it?" Cid yawned, he leaned over the bed to reach the small table and grabbed his watch. He almost fell flat on his face as he stretched out abit to far for his form to handle. He managed a muffled curse as he landed face first in the covers.

The pilot sprang up, his eyes widened for a moment but they quickly closed before he sleepily opened them again. He hated drinking and staying up far past his bed time. The drive home to the town really wasn't that appealing.

Cute wasn't the word Vincent wanted to use right now to describe the pilot, irresistible was the ideal word. He quickly pushed the thoughts out of his mind, Cid would never entertain the notion of a relationship with him. He was his friend. Nothing more.

Cid was going to be a father to Shera's child. Cid would be much happier with the timid engineer, she would look after him. All he could do was bring the pilot was pain and misery.

Cid stood up and headed for the now vacant shower. He stopped at the window and peeked out of it, it looked like it was going to be a clear day. He should be able to get home and start work on the _Tiny Bronco _or the _Highwind_. He was filled with the sudden urge to fly, to get away from the life that had now been placed in his lap.

Get away from everything and everyone for a few short hours. 

As much as he loved Shera and Vincent, he wanted to get away from them as well. Space was now a distant dream and so was flying. Spending last night with Vincent made him realise how high maintenance friends were. 

"How ya feeling?" Cid asked as he walked by his friend, he smelt better for a start.

"Better," Vincent admitted truthfully, he still had his fever but it was slowly breaking.

__

Chaos…for once I thank you for your healing powers, he thought with a small smile.

The pilot stopped just outside the bathroom and turned round, a thought struck him. This was the first time that he'd seen the former Shin-Ra assassin without the hindrance of his hair or the ever present cowling that covered the lower half of his face.

"Shit…you call yourself a monster?" Cid looked at Vincent.

Vincent looked away for a moment, hurt flashed across his face before returning to a fairly emotionless mask. 

"…Yes," his pale jaw twitched in anger.

"Shit! Sorry, it wasn't meant as a fucking insult," the pilot rubbed his eyes and sighed, "I'm still have asleep."

The damage it seemed had already been done. The work that had been done last night was over within a second and Cid watched as Vincent turned away from him. Was it his way in life to screw him any chance of happiness? He had managed to put his old boots in it as usual.

He watched as Vincent gathered up his clothes and gave Cid a very pointed look.

__

…can we all say Shera? Shit, I didn't even mean to make it sound like I was being mean, all I meant was that he's damn good looking. Why is he so damn bitchy all of…no, wait. He's being Vincent. A sure sign of him feeling better, the pilot rolled his blue eyes mentally and closed the door. It was going to be one of those horrid, why-did-I-get-out-of-my-bed days and spending it with Vincent was really going to make it hard.

Cid rubbed his eyes and shook his head. He wanted to do lots of things at the moment, the number one being the chance to get his head in order and things to go back to the way they were. He'd give the stars to just have only the worry of trying to get the rocket back up in the air and into space.

He had came to Vincent for advice, he just wanted a chance to talk about how he felt. He didn't want to get to deep, he wanted to get totally drunk. Block out all the thoughts in his head and hopefully forget them.

Ever since Cloud Strife had entered his town, things had gone from bad to worse. The first was watching as AVALANCHE stole his _Tiny Bronco _from right under his nose, the second having his materia stolen from him by the teen ninja and then, things had went downhill. Watching as Aeris was stabbed by Sephiroth in the Forgotten city, to the destruction of Midgar.

He felt tears sting his blue eyes and he rubbed them away harshly. He wasn't going to cry, no way. It wasn't his way of dealing with pain. He wasn't like Cloud or Barret or the rest of AVALACHE.

The people of the world were looking to AVALANCHE as potential leaders, hoping the eight victorious savours would return them to a very normal way of life. Didn't the planet know that the eight who had saved them had their own motives for doing it? None of them had done it for the planet. He was sure as hell that Vincent didn't do it. Barret had quite openly admitted that he had done it for his daughter, what the others reasons he didn't care.

Why had he done it? Why did he risk his life for a small round seemingly insignificant sphere and the residents who he didn't know from Adam? He had always thought that it had been for Shera. That she was his reason for fighting but she hadn't been there for him in the dark, cold, hostile place the North Crater. AVALANCHE had been, Vincent and Cloud had took the long dangerous road with him. Cloud had been so determined to fight the winged freak, Vincent looked on the edge of a nervous breakdown the closer he got to killing the son of his beloved Lucrecia.

Cid had said very little, Vincent and Cloud had looked over to him. Hoping for some kind of encouragement from the Shin-Ra pilot. He had swore at them, telling them that if they wanted optimism, then they should of picked Tifa. He was just here to enjoy the scenery.

__

"Cid, could you take this a little more seriously? Now isn't the time to be joking around," Cloud had all but screamed at him.

Vincent had look relieved at the chance of some humour but he had merely kept his emotionless mask. His metal claw of a hand had never strayed to far from the menacing looking shotgun called the Death Penalty. 

Cid had shrugged, "So fucking what. Do you want me to be all fucking depressed?"

Cloud had gave him an exasperated sigh, "Cid. A little decorum would be nice. What we're doing is rather serious!"

Cid had given him a foul look, "Shit, if ya want me to mosey, then just tell me."

Cloud was slowly losing his temper with the pilot. He always found some little thing to comment on and to bitch about. Didn't the man know anything about how important this fight was? Didn't he even care? The former Ex-Soldier took a deep breath, trying to sooth himself, they were all edgy. Cloud wasn't to sure but had he heard Vincent chuckle at the comment of the pilot moseying?

"Cid, I don't wanna lose to Sephiroth," Cloud crossed his arms, "So for the last time. Grow up." 

Vincent had came to the older blonde's defence, breaking his own forged silence, "Our colleague here has the right idea. We may lose the battle anyway. There is no way in knowing that if we do take this seriously, we will indeed win."

Cid pulled out another of his ever present cigarettes and expertly flicked it in his mouth, "Cloud, let me be honest with ya. I couldn't give a flying fuck."

The wind had howled all around them, the ever present smell of evil filling around them. The roar of the life stream ever present below them and they could all feel the ever present presence of Sephiroth.

The two blondes it seemed to Vincent were going to duke it out. Both looked ready to rip each other to shreds, well, Cloud looked ready to beat the crap out of the pilot. They were all scared but to start fighting in the very bowels of the planet…? Even his demons knew the only way to win this particular fight was to work together. Not to fight each other.

"So why the hell are you here then? Do you think this is some kind of game?" Cloud hissed, his electric blue eyes were sparking with anger.

The older blonde seemed to lose his willingness to fight the younger blonde, he took a step back, "Shit if I know, Spike. Just seems like the right thing to do."

The right thing to do…was it the right thing to do? He had felt like it was. Saving the planet, it would certainly look impressive in the old C.V.

World hero, pilot, astronaut, mechanic and eco terrorist, well maybe not the eco terrorist but the other four would surely impress people. However, it seemed to fail to impress him. He just saw it as another role he had to play. He was just a helpless bystander in the great scheme of things, no matter what people would say.

He shrugged the thoughts out of his head, they weren't his concern anymore. He'd just live out his days in the sleepy Rocket Town. Get the old team back together again and build a new rocket. One better and way bigger than the Shin-Ra Number 26.

__

Tank number 8 blew…so it really was malfunctioning…, the words he'd said back on the rocket rang in his head. He'd been caught in the debris and had pretty much given up on ever trying to return back to the planet. Until Shera had walked calmly up and helped pull the large tank off him.

He'd never ever had been forced to eat so much humble pie in one serving before. He thought he'd choke on it as he and the others followed her down to the escape pod. He hadn't said a word to her until they were at the pod and he had the gall to ask her if the damn thing actually worked. Shera had simply nodded and said that she'd been checking it until now.

Desperately he tried to get rid of any thoughts that were trying to invade his mind, he started to run his shower and watched as the water ran down into the drain. Slowly, he peeled off his clothes, wincing as his hands hadn't quite recovered from the various bumps and bruises they'd received. His lower back screamed in pain, it seemed yesterday's game of leap frog on the stairs had finally caught up with him. It was, he thought with a grim smile, going to be a pain in the backside until they heal.

He was brought out of his silence by Vincent's ever soft voice, could that guy raise his voice or was he stuck with a permanent whisper? Fearing that if he raised it even the slightest, something bad would happen?

"Captain," the softness had a tone of anger to it, the ex-Turk was still sulking about the comment, "Do you care for some breakfast?"

"Nah," the blonde called back, "I just wanna get back home as soon as."

__

What's the rush? The town's going to be there when ya get back, a voice offered, _sides, I thought you wanted to get the hell away from those guys?_

Cid listened for a response but none came. It seemed like Vincent wasn't that fussed if he starved or not. Another sign that the man was regaining some control over his sanity.

**********************

Vincent sat on the bed and listened to the water running in the bathroom. He was angry at Cid. The comment had hurt him. 

__

You call yourself a monster? 

He did but he didn't want to be reminded of it every second of the day.

His right palm stung, he's completely forgotten about it until now but he needn't of worried, the wonderful restorative powers of his demons had the wound closing and in a few hours wouldn't even be there.

He pulled his boots on, he'd be gone in a few minutes. By the time the blonde pilot had finished showering, he'd be out of his life for good.

__

Master…why? If you ask him, it may be a simple mistake. You may of caught him off guard, Chaos offered.

__

Why should you care? Aren't you supposed to want to kill and hurt?

Chaos shrugged, _This world has seen to much pain and death already. We do not wish to add to it. Our time is near the end._

Time? Our time? Vincent stared at Cid's mud covered boots blankly, what had the beast meant by that?

__

Hojo…never meant for us to exist for that long. He wanted you to suffer, Chaos explained sadly.

__

I am dying, Vincent Valentine, the winged demon stated.

************************************

Ok, chapter two is now up!!! I really don't know about this chapter and sorry it took so long. I've been working and I really like doing this when I have plenty of time. But I should be doing a big old chapter in about a week and a half…as in, expect something fairly decent by the end of the month! Again ,thanks to all the really nice people out there! Emerald embers….you've managed to cause fights at my work because we all disagree about the freshness of a cream egg…..!

Oh yeah, shamless plug of my other fanfic! Another way to live! Go and read it! It has Vincent and the guys but it's set 7 hundred years later…..dud duh duh!

Well, anyhow, I'm off to stop the wedding of the evil photocopier and the water cooler at my work!

Chapter three will be coming soon!!! 


	3. Need

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Thanks so far to Tir, Teka1313, Moomba and Callie and emerald embers. You have no idea as to how honoured I feel knowing how much u like reading this! I feel….sniff, so warm and fuzzy.

**********************

Chapter 3

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What do you mean? Dying? Your immortal! How can you die? Vincent cried mentally. He barely managed to keep himself from crying out loud. His demon couldn't die!

__

I am only what Hojo created me. Nothing more, the will to hurt is no longer as strong as it once was. I am dying, along with the others, Chaos explained, _The process cannot be stopped._

I don't want to die…, Vincent weakly cried out, his anger subsiding fast. 

Suddenly the past week came into focus, he had helped kill Jenova and her psychotic son. Chaos had been strangely quiet since the final battle. His demon had said nothing as the former Turk walked away from the _Highwind _and his new found friends.

****************

__

"I bid you farewell," Vincent said curtly, he was in no mood to stay any longer than necessary.

Cloud looked at him, his Mako blue eyes smiling, "If it's what you want."

"It is," he had said rather to quickly.

He took in all his allies with one last look. He had to admit that they were the most odd looking companions ever to grace the planet. A lion creature from the sleepy Cosmo Canyon, a ninja from the defeated Wutai. A miner from Corel, a stuffed toy controlled by a Shin-Ra employee called Reeve. A bartender and a former Soldier member with severe mental issues. Finally, one pilot with rather bold dreams of space flight and a rather fascinating grip of the English language.

The pilot had said nothing to him on the flight home, he stood a little back from the main group. Standing quietly and drawing circles in the dirt. His blue eyes avoiding everything and everyone who tried to catch them.

"I would also prefer it if you left me to my own company. Do not feel the need to visit me unless it is for something dire," Vincent forced his eyes from looking at Cid, "and even then, unless the very planet is threatened, I do not wish to speak with you."

Being with you has added yet more sins to my already burdened mind, _Vincent thought, it was taking all his strength now not to collapse in a heap from exhaustion._

The final battle had taken more out of him then the entire journey put together. Climbing down and then the heart stopping ride out of the deep cavern that Sephiroth resided in, had drained all those who remained in his body. None of them had tried to speak with him since he the battle. Were they all reflecting the battle? Chaos might be but the other demons…who knew.

The other's headed back inside the airship that they had bravely and rather amazingly stole right from the evil Shin-Ra's nose, Cid remained outside, he crossed his arms and sighed.

"Is there something else, captain?" Vincent remained standing a few feet away from the blonde.

"Well…um…not really…but ahh," Cid scratched a spot under his chin and found a rather interesting spot on the hull of his ship.

"But what?" Vincent began to feel rather uncomfortable at the growing silence and awkwardness that was rising.

Didn't Cid know that he wanted nothing more to do with them? His life was nothing now. He had atoned the best he could, now the only way to further it was if he avoided any contact with human life. If he wasn't near anyone, how could he hurt them?

"Look, I really don't know how ta say this," Vincent could see his allies ears go red, apparently, the subject was rather delicate or rather embarrassing.

You have never suffered from lack of communication before, in fact, you have the exact opposite, _Vincent crossed his arms, waiting for the suddenly less vocal captain to speak._

"…Thanks. For everything," Cid rushed out, "I mean, if ya ever need anything. Anythin' at all, just call me. Need ta use the airship or if ya just wanna talk. Call me."

Vincent raised an eyebrow, how was he to respond to that? Cid had offered a similar offer before the final battle. Saying that if they survived the fight, the former Turk was more than welcomed to stay with him.

Call me? Why would he offer this to me? Why haven't I shown him the coldness that I have shown the others? Why isn't he giving up? I don't understand…_Vincent said nothing but looked at the airship, hoping Cid would get the hint and leave him alone._

"I'll see ya soon right?" Cid had the tone of optimism in his voice.

"………" Vincent breathed, he wasn't going to be able to say no without hurting the pilot's feelings, so if he didn't answer, no one got hurt.

The blonde made a move to say something but no words came out, he merely raised his hand and offered a weak wave. Hurt flashed across his features for a second before the tired smile replaced it.

Vincent felt like someone had shoved a red hot poker into his chest as he walked away calmly. His new lease on life had been a short lived yet eventful one, saving the planet from a raving psycho and a huge rock all in a space of two months.

It was now time to return back to the hell that had created him. It was time to go home.

*******************

Vincent sat on the bed, wrapping his arms around in in a vain attempt to get warm. The shock of Chaos telling him he was dying and not being fully dressed and so many other things had made him so weak. He needed to be warm and the only way to get it was to ask the man currently taking a shower.

Cid came out of the shower, towel wrapped around his waist. Ugly looking bruises covered his chest, along with a scar than ran round half his waist. The sleeveless shirt that he always wore held in his bare hands and dripping wet.

The blonde blushed almost instantly as he looked at Vincent, they had never really seen each other in half naked. The older man's chest was pale but showed some muscle. Scars and bruises ran every which way, all colliding with each other. Some of them, he guessed, the bruises anyhow, were from the final battle with Sephiroth. Vincent had refused to leave Cid behind as the blonde tripped over a piece of rock in the collapsing cave. The ex-Turk had taken a heavy blow when a monster appeared out of nowhere but the man had already delivered the lethal blow to the beast. The pair had ran, step for step to the oddly parked _Highwind _but Cid said nothing about the impromptu landing bay. The pilot had seen to many odd things in his travels the past two months to be even concerned about it.

He did however, once the pair were safely on board, comment as they bolted into the cargo bay.

__

"Does anything seem odd to you anymore?"

"Describe odd."

Cid had grinned and laughed at the simple reply. It seemed he had forgotten the madness that was coming and forming all around them. Nothing it seemed could faze the blonde for long.

Seeing Vincent transform into each of his demons for the very first time had caused him to lose his speech for the best part of an hour but made him befriend the guy even more. Vincent needed friends. Even though he had four others within, he was still a lonely guy.

"Didn't mean what I said," Cid whispered to his friend, "I…just wanna know if ya could forgive me."

Vincent's wet hair clung to his neck, shivering. He was staring at a spot just near the doors.

"Vince?" Cid frowned, what the hell had just happened to in the few short minutes he was showering? What the hell was happening to his friend?

His friend didn't answer him, why was the wall so damn fascinating all of a sudden? It was after all, just a wall. Granted, with the most seediest wall paper ever thought of.

__

Don Corneo must of bought this place and decorated it, Cid shook his head, dispelling the image of the rather perverted self proclaimed lover of sector 5. The man, was now the lunch of the local animals at the bottom of the Wutai god statues. He had went, along with Vincent and Cloud to the quiet eastern town, in the vain hope in finding a clue as to where the Temple of the Ancients were. They hadn't.

All they ended up with was a real bad headache and the charming Yuffie had gotten her young ears burned with his amazing English skills. Or rather, lack of.

"Leave me alone," Vincent whispered, "I don't…need or deserve your friendship."

The words stuck the blonde like a weapon. What he said was out of order and he did feel bad about but there was a limit as to how many times a guy could beat himself over the head.

"I said I was sorry. Shit, what do ya want me to do?" Cid had never felt so vulnerable in his life. He didn't usually stand in a towel with a guy who had tried to kill him a few hours back. 

"…there's very little you can do for me. Not unless you can resurrect Hojo," Vincent shakily offered, his voice was quivering and ready to break.

Cid's eyes narrowed, he hated the very mention of that man. The very name pissed him off. Made his blood boil to no end. He clenched his fists tightly, his finger nails digging into his palm.

Why was he acting like some jealous lover? Hojo was some monster who had hurt Vincent. What he should be feeling is some type of friendly and sympathetic form of anger.

"Fuck, I thought ya got over him?"

"He created me," Vincent turned partly round to face him, his red eyes lowered and hidden by some of the wet fringe.

The captain said nothing as he entered the bathroom again. He kept the door partly opened, just wide enough to see Vincent through the gap. He watched as the older man began to rock back and forth on the bed.

__

Shrink would have a fucking field day with the whole messed up AVALANCHE mind. One prime example of a victim needing the love and support given by the abuser. Cloud, by a former war hero. Vincent, a wacko scientist…cid pulled his combats on, lost in his thoughts and his version of psyche 101.

*************************

Shera pulled up into the Nibelhiem inn just after 2pm in the afternoon. She would of arrived sooner but morning sickness had came back with a vengeance and lasted a lot longer than the morning.

She had pulled on a simple pair of jeans and a white warm jumper, it hid the growing bump that seemed to be growing a tiny bit each hour. How would he react if he learned of the pregnancy?

Joyful? Angry? Upset or just that rather bizarre form of calm that had taken hold of him? The calmness scared the living daylights out of her, she didn't know what he'd do.

She felt bad about failing to pick him up yesterday but he just had to call when the evil storm had crashed in. It had ground Rocket Town to a complete halt. For that, she had to be grateful. No late night callers or visitors for the captain. Perhaps he had at least one decent night sleep? Wasn't Mr Valentine a very quiet individual? The captain had spoken very highly about him, when he had spoken. The other members of the team had been less than enthusiastically spoken of. That was odd, as he would usually find something good to say about people. Even if it was just a very polite thing.

She had been worried when she had first seen the female members of the group. The two young women travelling with Cloud were indeed very beautiful and she was scared that one of them might just steal the captain from her. Tifa Lockheart with her long brown hair, chocolate eyes and well, assets. Aeris had a very innocent quality to her. Like she wanted to be everyone's friend, even if they didn't want her to be. 

Though, there was the nasty rumour going around that it wasn't the women who had caught the blonde's blue eyes. The local fish wives had began saying that the blonde was gay. All because he didn't have many female companions in his life and that he was always so aggressive towards the fairer sex. 

__

Bet they were surprised to learn I was with child, Shera had to admit the looks on the sewing groups face were a picture, as she'd been told by her friend Meg.

Ever since the little talk Meg had had with them, they had been as nice as punch but the timid engineer could see the bitter repercussions working in their spiteful little minds as she walked by them. Cid had once had a run in with them and they had gotten an earful from him. It was shortly after the rocket disaster, a few days.

Cid had been walking quietly along the street, hoping to avoid anyone. He pretty much hadn't said anything to anyone. The rocket slanted in the background and the sun peeked out from behind the grey clouds. The sun seemed to stop trying to shine in the town. Nothing could possibly lift the spirit of the man walking, nothing could of prepared the sewing group for the reaction the pilot was going to let rip as soon as they mentioned something.

Shera had watched from the captain's home, peeking out of the window. She hadn't dared venture outside, she couldn't bear to see the resentment etched onto everyone's face as she walked. It was bad enough that she had to deal with it with the captain, but having the entire town? 

She wished that the old women would leave him alone but alas. They hadn't. She couldn't hear what was said but the look on Cid's face as he passed them was one of anger. 

She could only watch as she spotted one of them whisper something behind his back and that had set him off. He had span round and exploded at them. Screaming insults before walking calmly away from them.

Red faces were all around and she imagined one of them saying, "Imagine that. We're were only trying to be polite."

The only one good thing to come out of it was that they had never walked on the same side of the street as the captain anymore. They avoided even speaking with him but she had her doubts at the party that was held after the successful rocket launch. They had been to eager to tell him, even after Meg had warned them not to. All that had got her was a rather funny look when he sat back down with her, after being dragged away by one of the daughters for a dance.

She shook the doubts out of her head, it didn't matter anyway. Once they came to that bridge, she'd deal with it. Hopefully, the outcome would be a positive one.

She leaned forward a little in the car and pulled her bag out from under her feet, the cell phone she had was somewhere in it. She'd give the captain a call before walking into the inn and collecting him. Just to make sure he was alright.

*********************

The phone rang in one of Cid's coat pockets, Vincent eyed it warily. He had never liked mobile phones, made it far to easy for people to contact you. Part of him knew he should call for the pilot but another wanted to keep the ringing phone a secret.

The needy part gave him the, 'What if it's someone who wants to take him from you?'. The more logical side told him to get his ass moving and answer it, failing that simple task, call the man.

"The…" it took to much effort to speak, to even think about forming any type of sensible words. He looked to the door, hiding his friend.

__

He said he was sorry for saying what he did. He says he's sorry for lot's of things that has happened to me, Vincent sighed shakily. He knew this wasn't how the others had seen him. No one alive had seen him this weak, not even when he was a Turk. Weakness was a very bad trait to have and to show. So was any type of emotion.

__

Why am I showing this to Cid? Vincent shook his head, trying to get his body into some form of working order.

Cid appeared out of the bathroom a few moments later, briskly running a hand through his short hair. He paused, concentration falling on his face.

"That my phone or yours?"

Vincent gave him a one shoulder shrug. He was tired, so much for feeling any better. Painfully slowly, he pulled his black shirt on, taking care not to rip the delicate material it was made of.

Cid knelt down in front of the dark haired man, a friendly and gentle smile playing on his face. He noticed that his friend was having trouble with the small buttons on the shirt.

"Here, let me help," he said gently. The ringing phone had been forgotten, the blonde more interest in helping his friend dress so he could get out of the dead town. He hadn't put his ever present flight gloves or his flight jacket so all his arms were visible not just at the elbows.

Vincent took the blonde's hands, noticing the scars that were on each wrist. Had Cid attempted to escape from life as well? 

Cid sat quietly, allowing the touch. His jaw twitching as he awaited the question that would eventually appear between them. That was one of the reasons he wore the long leather gloves, to hide the scars.

"Why?" Vincent whispered, he traced the deep scars gently with his human hand. Cid was one of the few optimistic people he knew. He didn't ask what happened, no one liked trying to explain.

"I felt hurt," Cid offered, "I thought my death would make things better. Just as well I screwed up huh?"

__

So, at some point, Cid had felt so depressed that he felt that his death would solve all? But what had stopped it? Who had gave him the will to live again? Vincent shivered, the action not going unnoticed by the pilot.

Cid pulled Vincent back into an embrace, trying to stop him from shivering, "The hell are we gonna do with ya?"

Vincent kept shivering, he tried to block out of the thoughts about his own life, the one before Hojo, before Luceria. Before everything went wrong. He should of stayed in the coffin. He would have been safer, he would have had more time to atone for his sins.

"Just don't leave me," he whispered.

__

Not when I need you the most.

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Hey kids. Sorry for the long wait. I'm having writers block…………. I do apologize for the bad chapter…….I might do a whole chapter that is a songfic….it could work.! Thanks to all who are reviewing! I love ya heaps and heaps! And I urge you to go and visit Emerald Embers and Teka1313 websites. they are so good and so is there fan fiction. Hey, guys! Can I post this on ur sites? 


	4. meeting the captain

Sorry for the long wait. Also, for the bad fic 'why did you leave me'. it will get better, I think.

This chap will mostly be a what I think happened when the camera wasn't on the team. It's a Previously on FF7, (in that really cheesy voice!) so it's abit AU. It's Vincent's view on what he thought when he first woke up and travelled to rocket town. Oh, yeah, be warned, cloud and aeris bashing. 

********************

The room was silent as the blonde held the ill Vincent. Cid kept Vincent close to him, taking in the sweet smell of strawberries. He took a few moments to wonder why he found that odd.

Oh yeah, Vincent hated the sweet berries. In a rare moment, the ex-Turk had told him that the berries made him physically ill, even just thinking about them

Shera was probably making her way to the inn right now.

"Come on," Cid carefully broke the embrace, standing up. He gently pulled Vincent up with him.

The move broke the older man out of his thoughts and back to the reality that he sought to escape.

"We're leaving?" the ex-Turk asked.

"Yep," Cid picked up his goggles and fixed them back to their proper home on his head. He didn't bother with the smokes that were part and parcel with his look. He swore that he would give them up if he survived Meteor. He was doing ok with the white little beggars.

"Able to walk?" the captain raised an eyebrow as he walked to the window. He pulled the heavy curtains open, filling the room with sunlight. The blonde was dubious about his friend's standing ability.

Cid blinked and squeezed his eyes shut. He hated mornings when he didn't get enough sleep. Generally, he hated mornings. Why god had created them was beyond him, why couldn't humans get up about noon? A feeling told him to check his watch for the correct time and he mentally groaned, it had just left 2.15pm.

__

I really should go and get my eyes tested, Cid looked out of the window and spotted Shera's car sitting below the window. A painful cramp started making itself felt in his foot.

"Are we heading to Rocket Town?" Vincent asked.

__

I told you about a dozen times before. Yes, we're going. You'll be staying with me and Shera, the captain rubbed his face with both his hands, _but it's not his fault. He's sick…hey, maybe I should give cloud a call? See how he's doin?_

Why was it that people never think about calling people who have been through or what could be going through the same thing until days afterwards? Cid gave a short 'hm' noise from the back of his throat, mentally chiding himself for being stupid.

__

He waiting for an answer, the reason voice inside the blonde's head rolled his eyes, _Remember? He asked if you were heading back home. You thought it and ol' vampie over there can't read this trash can you fondly call a fucking mind._

"Yeah, we're heading back to mine," the mayor of the town responded, "How you feelin?"

__

My demons are dying, I am dying and in the process I could kill you…how do you want me to feel? I mean, it's not like the first few days after Cloud awoke me, Vincent wrapped his arms around himself, trying not to feel the coldness of the room.

*******************

Past, a few days after Vincent wakes up

__

"What's past these mountains? Any guesses?" Cloud asked the assembled members of AVALANCHE. He watched as the team shrugged. The former Soldier member locked gazes with the newest recruit. 

Of all the team assembled, he should perhaps know. Though that raised doubts in his own mind, he should know. He'd travelled around the world.

Vincent was the first to look away, "Rocket Town, I think."

"You think?" Barret exploded at the quiet man, "Da hell does that mean?"

"………" Vincent said nothing as the huge man continued with the insults.

As far as he could recall, Rocket Town was on the other side of the mountain. When he was last awake, Wutai was building a small missile base past the Nibel mountains but that was over thirty years ago. Hell, all his favourite movie stars and tv shows were dead or no longer showing. The thoughts were certainly sobering.

"It is," the teen ninja confirmed, "Though it's been pretty quiet for a while. Ever since the Shin-Ra took it over."

Vincent didn't think much of the assembled group or their mission to save the world from the son of Lucrecia. His beautiful Lucrecia, he knew he was sinning by following Cloud.

The former Turk sighed quietly, "Light is fading. We should bid our leave of this desolate and morbid place."

He enjoyed the look of confusion etch on two of the group, Yuffie and Barret. It was good to see that at least half the group understood the words that he uttered. Though, the feeling was returned. Whenever those two uttered words, he could barely grasp the words. That was why he was silent. Not because he didn't have any relevant information or because he didn't like talking, oh no. he loved talking. He just didn't understand the group. He hadn't found his friend in the group yet either. They were too busy playing house with each other.

"Good idea," Cloud nodded, the young man started to walk way from the group.

Vincent waited until the others had started to follow him, he'd bring up the rear. Protect the group from the monsters that would lurch at them from the darkeness. 

Perhaps he could atone by doing that.

Rocket town, past

Vincent hated being with Cloud and Aeris. The two were always giving each other loving looks whenever they gazed into each others eyes.

If he was honest, he was simply jealous. He would never have anyone to hold onto at night. His bed would always be cold.

He followed them into the sleepy town, amazed at what he saw. So, the Shin-Ra really had managed to get their minds into gear about going into space. Palmer had finally managed to find funding for the dangerous project.

A huge green rusting rocket was tilting dangerously to the side, supported only by a failing metal structure. Vincent's red eyes widened, it was simply amazing.

"Holy cow! Would ya look at that," Cloud exclaimed, "A rocket!"

Aeris seemed to be just as enthralled with the huge metal rocket, "This is so cool. I never thought I'd see one."

It's a rocket. Big deal, seen one, seen them all. Can we please get on with destroying what little remnant of my life I have? _Vincent thought bitterly._

He almost shoved his hands in his pockets, trying to give off an air of annoyance. Aeris simply ignored it as she grabbed his arm and started to pull him towards a middle aged man who Cloud was talking to. He caught only half the conversation, something about a captain.

"You should ask the captain," the guy said, he pointed over to a house at the bottom of the rocket.

Vincent caught sight of something pink peeking out from the trees that shaded the house. Something big.

Great god, _ Gilian roared within, _A giant flower girl! Run for the hills. The horror of it all! We shall be consumed with niceness and love…kill them now and be done with it.

__

Vincent rolled his eyes mentally at the bad joke and the order to kill the group. Though it was hard to go against what he was trained to do and what he was feeling.

He followed Aeris and Cloud to the house, hoping that they knew they were being followed. He had seen a Shin-Ra logo truck from miles behind. Always keeping just far enough away to avoid being seen, pity they didn't expect the group to join forces with a former Turk. He knew all the tricks of the trade. Hell, he'd made some new ones up.

Cloud stopped as he managed to find the back door, "Wonder what's outside."

Vincent bit back an answer of 'The giant pink flower girl.' He shrugged with his right shoulder. Whatever it was, it was baby pink in colour.

As if on cue, he heard Cloud's exclamation of surprise and joy as the young man found the large pink object.

"Aw man, this is so cool," Cloud turned round to face his two companions, his blue mako eyes wide with awe, "It has a Shin-Ra logo on it. The Tiny Bronco."

A timid voice broke the group out of their plane gazing, "Uh, excuse me…but who are you?"

Cloud was, as usual the first to speak for the group, "Cloud, ex-soldier."

Did the youth really need to tell everyone who he was? Cloud would usually suffice.

"I'm aeris, nice to meet you," the flower girl of the slums offered her hand to the older woman.

"I am Vincent. Mt occupation is…ah…forget it," the former killer for the almighty Shin-Ra offered. 

No point scaring this mouse of a woman,_ he thought._

"If you would like to use the plane, you might want to ask the captain," the mousy woman gazed past the group to the cool little plane.

"Where could we find him?" Aeris enquired.

"The most likely place would be the rocket. He's trying to get it up and ready for the Shin-Ra coming. Wants to show Rufus that the Space Program is still worth it," the woman sighed.

"Rufus is coming here?!" Cloud felt his heart quicken at the name. He should of kicked the new president's ass back at the headquarters but time had been against him.

Part of the woman's statement did you not understand? _Vincent said nothing, watching Cloud react to things was always worth a view minutes._

The woman nodded, "Yes so, you better go now before the captain get's in a foul mood."

Once again, Vincent found himself following. This time to see the captain……

***********************

I do apologize for this chapter. I thought I better update quick before I lose all my readers. Hope you all stay with me! 

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	5. 5

don't own, ….thank you for all the reviews. I promise on my muses cid and Vincent to write more for this fic.

It's still in the past and I'm not sure how it fits in with the rest but don't worry, cid will realise how much he cares for our favourite tortured soul!

Again sorry if it's not like previous chapters.

Anyhow, thanks again!

****************

Still in the past

__

The rocket wasn't that far from the captain's home. In fact, it was nearly in the backyard. The mousy woman they had greeted had disappeared back into the home, saying that she had to get things ready for the new president.

The former Turk had been tempted to ask what had happened to President Shin-Ra, who was Rufus? When did President Shin-Ra die? No one had really explained the current state of affairs of the world he was now awake in. he had had to create his own little explanation and found it sorely needing.

He could feel the excitement radiate from Cloud and Aeris, though he didn't allow it to pierce through his carefully erected shields . Emotions he had discovered much to his peril, were only there to get yourself killed.

"Think he would let us borrow it?" Aeris asked as they walked to the green rusting stairs.

The young flower girl's voice from the slums voice held so much hope for life. Vincent wondered if she ever had to experience the cold harsh reality of life or was she still in the happy-go-lucky stage?

Cloud paused, "I dunno. Maybe but we don't have much time so, even if he says no we still have to do something."

"He means we will steal the plane like common thieves," the words tasted bitter in Vincent's mouth. 

The thought of stealing was disdainful. Common thieves did things like that, not a high ranking member of the Turks. 

The ex-Turk got a dark look from Cloud, "It what the Turks do."

For that Vincent had no words. Is that what the Turks now meant? Did they now steal? Had they reverted to stealing? If they had fallen that low, then what else would they steep to? Granted, the Turks never did have a squeaky clean image but stealing?

"…Not when I was alive," Vincent said softly.

Aeris placed a gentle hand on his right forearm, "I'm sure we won't have to steal the plane. If we explain why we need it, he'd be more than happy to help."

Vincent retracted his arm like he had been burned by the touch, he didn't need to be comforted by this child. He didn't need pity, sympathy or empathy from anyone. Least of all those in the group he had allied himself with. 

Cloud turned to the stairs and started to hike up them, "Come on. Who knows when Rufus will show up."

Being the gentleman, Vincent allowed Aeris to go first. He turned to catch a few of the townspeople looking at him oddly. He had heard all the whispers behind his back, felt every one of their stares as he walked with Cloud and Aeris. 

It's not Cloud or the flower girl they're staring at, _Gilian whispered, _It's you. They're wondering what you are. If you will kill them in their sleep…

Don't you think I know that?! _Vincent hissed back as he trudged up the stairs._

He didn't trust the ladder, it had been warped from exposure to heat and rusted. The rocket wasn't fairing much better either. Red rusty patches were visible from parts of the engine sections. The Shin-Ra logo on it fading and peeling.

"Come on slowcoach," Aeris playfully called back to him, "You should check out the view, it's amazing."

As usual, he refrained from answering. Merely looking up to the sky and seeing the clouds slowly moving across the bright blue vastness above him. The town would always be in favour good weather because of where it was. 

He started his climb to the top of the ladder, mentally counting how many rings were missing. His metal claw clinked on the green metal every time he grabbed one. Each one threatened to give.

Minutes later he stood with Cloud and the half Cetra woman at the entrance of the rocket. 

"That's a long way down," Cloud peered over the side of the flimsy railing, resisting the urge to spit like a child.

All three heard a loud curse coming from inside the rocket, "Fuck it all to hell! Stupid piece of Shin-fuckin'-Ra crap! Can't they build anything that aint fucked?!"

"Looks like we just missed him being in a good mood," Aeris whispered.

Cloud raised an eyebrow, "I think so too."

The former first class soldier pushed a small random button on the small pad next to the door, hoping it was the right one to enter. The door opened with a whoosh and revealed a dark green metal interior.

Without hearing a welcome or any other form of a greeting the trio walked in. A blonde stood to the left of the door, his attention focused on the small panel in front of him. Tools were scattered all around his feet, an empty tool box lay kicked to one side. Screws were littered and falling into the metal grating that consisted for a deck. Empty cigarette packets scrunched and thrown into a corner mingled with plastic coffee cups.

Vincent took a moment to look around, everything was rusting. Nothing was new and parts of it seemed to have been jury rigged. Welding scars ran down panels and bolts from make quick patch up jobs.

It didn't feel clinical, it felt human. Almost alive, lived in. It felt like someone's home.

Cloud tapped the blonde on the shoulder in an attempt to gain his attention, "Excuse me but are you the captain?"

"Captain? Yeah, I'm the captain," the blonde said as he turned round, "The names Cid."

Cloud shook hands with the older blonde, "I'm Cloud, this is Aeris and Vincent."

"That's fucking swell. The fuck do you want?" the captain asked with all the friendliness of a snake. Patience seemed to of passed this man.

He turned back to the panel as it started beeping for attention, all the while keeping his head partly turned to the group.

Cloud panicked for a moment before coolly asking a question. He needed to get on the good side of the captain if he wanted to borrow the bronco.

"Tell us about the rocket," Cloud smiled, if truth be told. He actually did want to learn about it.

The question made the older blonde beam in pride, "Not bad for a kid. Alright, I'll tell you…"

Vincent tuned out of the conversation, not really interested about learning how the space programme came into play but he couldn't tear his eyes away from the blue eyes of the captain. Never once did the blue eyes move from his down to his claw. There was no hint of questions behind them, just some form of a deep buried sadness that only a man who had suffered a loss could see. What was this man hiding so hard?

Cid kicked a panel, "…my dream is just a financial number to them. So when I heard that Rufus was headin over, well, they must be thinking' about startin up the space program. That's what we need, a young president!"

A failed dream? No…_Vincent looked to where Aeris was standing. The flower girl listened intently to the conversation._

"When is Rufus is heading over here?" Cloud needed to know exactly when the smug arrogant president was arriving.

"Supposed to be the day," the captain said before looking at his watch, "Shit…he should be here by now."

Cid regarded the trio in front of him, trying to figure out why a group so odd looking had graced his small town. Were they the terrorists that had been reported on the news channels of late? The dangerous criminals?

His gaze lingered longer on the dark haired man who had said nothing throughout the conversation. Again, he locked eyes with him and Cid smiled before sticking out his hand.

He was showing an interest in him other than one of morbid fascination. That puzzled him but, at the same time, he liked being treated like a normal person. It made him feel some how human. Pity, it would only be for a short while, a few minutes at best.

"Vincent right?" he watched in some amusement as Vincent naturally began to offer his right hand but stopped.

The blonde had used his right hand, meaning he would have to use his claw to shake hands. Carefully and slowly, he extended his metal left 'hand' and very gently took the blonde's. It was shaken boldly and with confidence. 

"I ain't a glass fucking doll," Cid offered, "You shake like my fucking dead grandpa."

Vincent stared at his claw, amazed at how at ease the blonde was. How trusting he was to allow this monster in front of him to grasp his hand without ripping it right off. Amazed at how at ease he was with the blonde. A smile tugged at his lips.

"Could we borrow the Tiny Bronco?" Cloud's question made Cid rip his hand from Vincent and turn sharply. None of the trio expected the blonde to explode at the simple request.

"Take the fucking Bronco?! Are you outta your freakin mind? She's my most cherished possession, no fucking way!"

Aeris pulled on Cloud's arm, "Jeez, we were only asking."

Vincent stepped back to allow them to leave the rocket, Cid's blue eyes softened as he looked at him.

"The fuck do they want it for?"

What do I say? We're on a quest to save the planet from Sephiroth? _Vincent was at a loss for words, unsure of what to say. Whatever he did say would sound insane._

"……To save the planet," he uttered, "We just need to get a new mode of transport and we'll be out of your town before you know it."

The captain lighted a cigarette, it was clear that the answer had sparked an interest within the blonde. Vincent could see the inner fight going on as to whether or not he should give them the plane. 

"I can't let ya have her. She's my sanity. Sides, last person to borrow one of my things never gave her back."

Vincent frowned, "Come with us then."

"Nope," Cid turned back reluctantly back to the panel, "If I want to get my dream…I have to stay here."

The ex-Turk walked out of the door, narrowly avoiding Cloud as he stood near the doorway. He said nothing as he passed the smaller man.

"Well? What did he say?" Cloud called to him.

"No," Vincent stopped at the ladder, his eyesight catching sight of a Shin-Ra truck drawing ever nearer the town………

~~~~~~~~~

30 minutes later…

Vincent squeezed his eyes shut as the tiny plane hurtled towards the huge ocean. He was never a big fan on flying. If man was meant to fly then he would have wings. Had no one realised that even birds crashed into solid objects? 

Cloud struggled with the controls, fighting against the winds and gravity. The effort made even more difficult to achieve because of the busted tail section of the plane. Whatever direction the plane was wanting to head, it was going. Unfortunately for the four on it, the direction was straight into the ocean. 

Aeris gripped the wing of the plane for dear life, the wind blowing her long hair almost out of the pink bow. A steady look of concentration marred her flawless looks.

Cid, Vincent could here above all the wind and Cloud's shouts, was screaming at Cloud for getting his plane shot to hell. Calling the three idiots and insulting their collective heritage.

Cloud knows how to make a good impression doesn't he? _Gilian asked rather polity, _I mean, he pretty much took the plane for a joy ride. Mind you, we didn't say whether or not we'd return it in one piece.

…No, we merely obtained it from Palmer. He was stealing it from the captain. We simply stole it from him, not the captain, _Vincent answered back in his reasonable voice, _So really, we're stealing it back for the captain.

That made no sense_, Gilian responded._

………, _Vincent could smell the salty water from below him. It was getting ever nearer, ever closer. The scent of faint cigarette smoke came closer._

"Hold on to your drawers and don't piss in them, it's gonna be one hell of a splash!" the captain bellowed from beside him.

Vincent took a sharp intake of breath, his eyes opened as the blonde snaked an arm round his waist and pulled the ex-Turk closer to the wing of the plane. 

"No son-of-a-bitch has ever died when a Highwind has been on a fucking plane," Cid muttered.

Whatever answer Vincent had brewing in his head was quickly cut short by the sudden and violent way the small pink plane crashed into the water. All four were thrown into the water, stunned by the impact.

Vincent gasped for air as he rose to the surface, his long hair clinging to his skull and face as he blindly groped for the edge of the plane. At least the captain didn't lie about the splash. 

Cid, Cloud and Aeris almost came up on cue, one after another as though they had timed it. Cloud's hair drooped down across his features, making him look a little normal.

"…Next time, I fly!" Cid spluttered as he grabbed the edge of the wing. He hauled himself up in one easy movement, being helped up by Vincent.

Within minutes the entire team was safely on board, soaked but in one piece. Cid was leaning over the side, trailing his hand in the water. Aeris sat at the end of the wing, trying to dry her hair in the midday sun. Cloud stood in the centre, hand raised over his eyes trying to see the shore.

"She won't fly no more," Cid muttered.

"Can't we use it as a boat?" Cloud suggested, trying to be helpful.

Vincent smiled under his cowling as he watched the pilot once again explode at the confusing shocking blonde Ex-Soldier. Had he really expected any other answer?

Once again he lost interest in the upcoming conversation, falling back to his thoughts. Why had Cid tried to help him? Why did he put his arm around him?

Why did the pilot tell him on the rocket that he wasn't going to join them but then, quite literally jump aboard as they flew above his head? What had changed his mind?

"…skulls?" Cloud's voice filtered back into his mind.

"Yeah, anyone dumb enough to go up against the Shin-Ra nowadays has gotta be a numbskull. I like it," Cid slapped Cloud on the shoulder.

Aeris looked over to Vincent, "You okay over there?"

Vincent said nothing, he turned his back to the three behind him. He was surprised when Cid tapped him on the shoulder, his blue eyes looking at him with disapproval.

"The lady asked ya a question."

"I'm alright."

The new member of AVALACHE stood a little closer to him, much closer than anyone in the team had ever attempted to do. He stood a few inches shorter than Vincent but was broader across the shoulders.

Cid placed a hand on his shoulder, "Ya sure?"

For some reason Vincent looked again into the captain's eyes, trying to look for something that wasn't there. Looking for pity and sympathy. Was he surprised to find none? What he did see was concern, did the stranger really care for him?

No what he found was something else. What he saw was friendship…he resisted the urge to grin, he'd just found his friend in the group.

~~~~~~~~

"I'm alright."

"Bull fucking shit," a familiar voice drawled, "Ya passed the fuck out on me."

Vincent opened his eyes, once again seeing concern. He heard a second set of footsteps behind him.

"Shera," Cid answered as he saw the question fly into his friend's eyes, "She came bout an hour or so back."

The former Turk struggled to sit up, his head reeling. The blonde in front of him was fully dressed, his hair however, still looked like he'd been playing with the electrical socket.

"I was…answering a question you asked when we first met," Vincent gratefully took the cup of water from the captain, taking a small sip from it.

Cid was struggling with a smile of amusement and of confusion, he settled for confusion.

"You are one odd person," Cid shook his head, "But I wouldn't change it for the world."

"Are you ready to go?" Shera asked politely.

Cid looked over to her, he nodded. 

"You head down first. I'll get Vince dressed and settle the bill," Cid stood up, wandering over to get Vincent's shirt from the other bed.

"Okay," Shera stopped beside Vincent and smiled, "It's good to meet you again Mr Valentine."

All Vincent could do was nod, "As with you."

"Okay, let's get you up without falling flat on your fucking ass," Cid headed towards him with a playful smile as Shera left the room.

The captain pulled Vincent up too quickly for even himself to properly gauge. He fell back as Vincent toppled on top of him. Had anyone entered they would of seen them in a compromising position.

Cid stared at Vincent's pale lips, he could hear his pulse thunder in his ears. Vincent was pinning him to the floor, intentionally or not, he couldn't quite decide but a small voice spoke from the back of his mind.

__

Test the water Highwind! Say it was an accident!

Cid followed up on the action, fully expecting the one on top to push away. Instead he was pushed further back as Vincent gently kissed him first.

"Captain?"

That one word seemed to echo throughout his mind. Captain? Seconds passed until the name of the one person who called him that sprang into his head.

Shera.

__

Oh fuck…he thought.


	6. 6

Hi! It's been so long since i last did a chapter for this...just haven't felt inspired for this as it was one of the first tales I ever started...

hope people still wanna read this...

Shera stepped back in a mixture of surprise and disgust. She hadn't seen what she just had. No way was that possible, the captain didn't like guys. No, not possible...never in a million years would he ever touch a man. Hugs and kissing made the blonde shiver in disgust, even talking about feelings made him leave a room.

She shook her head, "Captain...what?"

The blonde underneath the raven haired warrior looked away for a second, he didn't know what to say to her. He didn't even know what to say to Vincent or himself right now. All these feelings that had taken hold of him and he had no one to really talk to. The two people who he might've spoken to where the ones he didn't want to speak to.

Vincent stood up, looking at his feet. Once again he was the other man in a relationship. His heart sank, he was hurting another innocent soul and he shouldn't have even entertained the thought. Yet, Cid had actually moved to kiss him, surely that meant something?

He couldn't quite see Shera going out of her way to exact her revenge on him. Her soul didn't seem the type to be vindictive but he had always thought that Lucrecia had been a caring soul. He could be wrong about people but he felt so right about Shera. She would be devastated but wouldn't harm anyone and as far as he knew, she didn't have a secret lab in Cid's home.

The quiet woman held onto the door frame for support, "What happened?"

It was Vincent who came up with the badly made lie, "Nothing happened. He pulled me up a little to fast and I simply fell. It doesn't help being taller than him."

"Do I look stupid?" Shera gave him a pointed look, "You kissed him."

The former Turk took a breath, "...yeah. Bad call on my part. I'm sorry."

Cid blinked as he sat on his elbows, his blue eyes going from Vincent to Shera. Bad call? Was the kiss a mistake to him or was he just covering his ass when speaking to Shera? Surely he should at least make an excuse up but found he was to busy being ignored by the two standing people.

"You're sorry?" Shera placed a hand on her stomach, "No...I don't think you are."

Vincent blinked in surprise, he was sorry. He hadn't intended to feel things for the captain, he had been quite willing to actually curl up in a small ball and die in the mansion. It wasn't his fault that Cid had came to him looking for help and not her. Right now, he needed Cid to be here with him. If he was going to die, then he wanted to die with someone who made him feel human.

He wanted to learn more of the blonde, to find out why the pilot needed to feel so comforted while sleeping, to try and help him through whatever it was right now that seemed to be haunting him.

What possible motive did he have for telling her that lie? If anything he was trying to help her not to be hurt and he was trying to fix this. Telling her that the kiss had been nothing and that he had made all the moves on the blonde.

Why did she think that his actions had been dishonest? Cid wouldn't really be hers, no matter how hard she wanted him to. Trapping him with the child was only going to make them resent each other more in the end but he didn't want to be the reason why a possible relationship between them hadn't worked.

The room had taken on that cold chill again and it didn't seem to be warming anytime soon. The situation didn't look good, Cid had said nothing, the blonde merely sitting on the floor. His frame being dwarfed by the size of the beds and by the two standing above him. Shera stayed near the door, unsure if she wanted to scream at them or hit them or...anything.

_There has to be a rational explanation to this, _Shera shook her head, _Cid...tell me this isn't happening._

"We should head back," Cid slowly got to his feet, rejecting any help from Vincent as he stood up. He gave Shera a long look, he had to speak with her alone, in private and not with half the hotel.

He knew she was going to scream, shout and throw things at him. It was understandable, he was thinking about having a relaionship with a man he barely knew while she was pregnant with his child.

Whoa..thinking about a relationship with Vincent? No...it was just a kiss. They'd been through a lot...it happened in extreme cases where people of the same sex are often forced into, they develop feeling for each other. He cared alot for Tifa and Yuffie. Hell, if Tifa had kissed him, he wouldn't have fought her off.

_So, why did you when you had the chance? You know, after we got the Highwind back from the Shinra? The two of you were pretty cosy up there, _that same voice that had been telling to do stuff had came back, _you could have been in with a chance._

_I...she's like a sister to me_, Cid kept his face passive as he responded to the voice in his head, wondering why he hadn't acted upon the impulse when he had the chance to with Tifa.

He was attracted to her, she was a stunning brunette. Kind, sweet, loyal to a fault. When she relaxed after battle or even during battle, she still had that beauty that made most of her enemies misjudge her. As attractive as she was, she was just not his type. She was still a frightened little girl who needed to be loved and sadly, she was never going to get it as long as she stayed with Cloud.

He had told her that, after he had questioned her all about the awkward blonde. He could have been more polite about it but he had been so confused at the time, he wanted to know why the hell he had been put through the whole charade of Nibelhiem being burnt to a crisp and having a former Shinra general walking around like he hadn't shimmied of the mortal coil.

He knew he should have taken that topic up with Cloud or with the aforementioned general when they were getting their collective asses kicked by the transformed man with the one wing during the last battle they had had as a team.

**After the team have stolen the airship...**

_The evening had been pleasant, a little cold but nothing that a light sweater couldn't solve. He had came up on deck to get some fresh air, unsure if he really was doing the right thing by stealing the airship. Granted, it had been one hell of a feat to accomplish but had it been the right decision to make? The crew of the airship felt happier under his command, he could feel that as soon as he stept onto her after she had been stolen._

_They no longer hid or ran whenever Heidegger or Scarlett was mentioned and they didn't have to fear being attacked for not doing something fast enough. They were all good people who loved working on the legendary airship but had lost that love when they were under the rule of the Shinra. The air reeked of depression when he had ran aboard when the planet released the mighty Weapons on the unsuspecting populace._

_AVALANCHE had already been branded as traitors and now here he was, once a poster boy for the Shinra airforce, now he was a eco terrorist with grand theft larcany looming above his head. Not exactly something he could really fire on a C.V for any future employment, mind you. If things stayed the way they were going, job hunting would be the least of his problems._

_The crew of the Highwind were happy to follow his orders to the last. A new life had been breathed into them and they had actually nominated him to be the captian, even though there had been a perfectly capable one in command already._

_Anything he did now, he would be branded as a traitor and if he ever had the galls to step back into the airforce, they would court martial his balls to the high heaven and he'd be singing soprano for the rest of his life. He also really didn't like the fact that he would probably start spelling his name Sid._

_He hadn't spotted Tifa standing behind the grey bulkhead, "God...this is a mess."_

_"Yeah, it is," the young martial artist agreed, "and I'm so sorry for getting everyone involved in this."_

_Cid turned round, his blue eyes blinking in surprise. Why was she apologizing? It wasn't her fault, it was the Shinra, it was Hojo's. It was everyone else's bar her. She was one of the innocent idiots that the Shinra had fooled, just like he was. Like Vincent all those years ago._

_"You're...? Tifa, what the hell haveya got to be sorry for?" Cid rubbed the back of his neck, "Have I turned two pages at once here?"_

_That earned him a sour laugh, her dark eyes gazing over to the setting sun. He couldn't see how she felt it was her fault. She wasn't the one who had done all this, did she blame herself for Cloud? He had been there and he couldn't find any words that could have helped._

_All he had suggested when the young man had came to him was, 'Let's go back to the real world huh?'. Why had he suggested that? It wasnt like the real world was all that great in the first place. People die, the Shinra screwing the general public and here he was, trying to save the planet from a total fruitloop._

_"I should have been stronger. I should have told Cloud that he wasn't created by Hojo," Tifa hugged herself, feeling colder than it was, her long hair blowing in her eyes._

_"Ya tried to stop him but he wasn't listening to ya," Cid moved closer to her, "It aint your fault."_

_The young woman sniffed back tears, trying her hardest to fight the salty droplets but failing miserable. She shook her head, the wind making the hair on the back of her neck stand. She should have just allowed Scarlett to kill her, just taken the deep breaths as the gas filtered through._

_"I should have told him the truth," she whispered, tears fell freely down her face._

_"Which is what?" Cid pulled out a smoke from the near empty packet that he kept strapped under his goggles, "Uh, yeah sure Cloud. Hojo created you out of my memories.' TIfa, ya were scared, ya still are."_

_"You don't understand!" Tifa cried out, "No one does..."_

_The pilot gave her a pained look, he couldn't handle tears. He stretched his hand out to her but he pulled it back. He felt like an idiot as he rubbed the back of his head, he hated it when people cried. It wasn't like he couldn't help her, he just couldn't find the words that would make it go away._

_He looked at the setting sun, "Wherever he is, I promise ya, I'll take ya to him."_

_A another sour laugh emerged from Tifa's throat, "He's probably dead. Sephiroth's summoned Meteor and we're all gonna die so I might as well head back to Midgar and hand myself in. There's no way we can do this alone."_

_Cid walked over to the railing, "Let's go back to the real world huh?"_

_"What?" Tifa frowned._

_"If you feel damn useless," Cid turned round, leaning on the metal railing, "All I managed was 'let's go back to the real world'. Not exactly a great prep talk."_

_The martial artist looked to the heavens, wondering if the young former soldier was okay. If he was, then where was he? They had no clue as to where to try and find the young man and they were all being hunted by the Shinra. It somehow made her feel a little better that they had the use of an airship to go and find the missing Cloud. They were out of the Shinra reach, they could go wherever they pleased and not be hindered by them as they went from place to place._

_"This is your airship?" Tifa decided to change the subject, "The Highwind?"_

_That got a broad grin from the blonde, "Oh yeah. First of her kind and hopefully not the last. Aint she a beaut?"_

_"Very cool..." Tifa walked to the railing beside him, "Cloud first saw it when he climbed up the tower to get into upper Junon. He promised Aeris that he would try and give her a ride in it."_

_"Why didn't you tell him that he wasn't created?" Cid suddenly hated how his mouth would somehow and magically work with a will of it's own, never really letting him think about what he was asking and to who._

_The martial artist shrugged, "I don't know. Maybe because I really don't know who he is. I knew a Cloud, Sephiroth was right about that, and he left to go and join SOLDIER when we were young."_

_"Sephiroth could be trying to screw with ya head," Cid offered, "Vincent claims that you came running over to them looking for the black materia. When Barret went to give it to ya, the rest were knocked flat on their asses. They came to and found that you and Barret were gone but that's impossible. We were in that damn weird cave with the rest of the Shinra."_

_"Do you think that he's real?" the young woman whispered, catching him off guard again._

_"...no one can be as messed up as that kid," Cid offered her slowly, "and not show some signs of cracks. Mako does strange shit to the human body. I...I don't have an answer that I want to bet a life on right now."_

_"I mean," Cid shrugged, "if he aint real, don't cry over him. It's not like he would ever really be yours."_

_Tifa shivered, feeling the light spit of the rain as it started to fall on the Highwind's wooden deck. He was right. It's not like he would ever be her's but it didn't stop her from dreaming about it. It didn't make it hurt anyless that it was right. Cloud loved Aeris and he had been hurting when she had been killed so coldly by Sephiroth. _

_The sun had finally set and the air had taken on a colder, more lonlier feel to it. There was no warmth of her blood and she hadn't brought a jumper out with her, her teeth chattered in responce to the colder weather. She gazed onto the ground below the deck, they were passing over the snowy north, hoping to find some trace of the missing leader. _

_She blinked in surprise when Cid slipped his jacket around her, she had to stop herself from melting in his arms. His jacket felt so warm and cosy. Her arms and upper body feeling the heat almost instantly. Her legs still came out in goosebumps but she found that she could bear that as long as her chest was warm._

_"Thanks," she whispered into Cid's chest, a little amazed to find that he hadn't smoked the ciggarrete that he had pulled from the pack._

_"Hate to see a pretty girl freeze her ass off," Cid smiled awkwardly, unsure if Tifa meant to move the way she did then. He felt her arms slip around his waist, brushing agaisnt a scar that was decades old._

_"Barret would have your head if he saw us like this," Tifa rested her head on his chest, trying to count how many heartbeats the blonde was currently having. She'd never heard one beat as fast as this before, was she making him uncomfy?_

_"...uh...it's innocent right? Just two...friends...having an innocent...moment. You're upset...I...um..." Cid looked at every star that was showing in the sky as it darkened, unsure of what he should be doing._

_"Mmm," the young woman in his arms nodded, "Two friends."_

_Maybe Cid could give her what she really needed. Maybe she could give him the love he needed or was she just wishing agaisnt a fast falling star?_

_She tipped her head up slighty to try and make her move. Her dark eyes closing as she tried to move in for the kiss only to find Cid pull back. The man blushing furiosly as he shifted his weight from foot to foot._

_"What?" she breathed, "I don't...?"_

_Cid held out both his hands, "No...Tifa. I am the last asshole you wanna be thinking about that like. Go for someone your own age." _

**Present**

Even now, that sentence still rang true for him. He was the last one that anyone would want to love. He didn't care if he died a short painless death, he'd face it with a curse and swear like the bastard he was.

So why did Shera still feel the need to actually try and work on a relationship with him? He had treated her like mud from the word go when the rocket failed to go the first time yet he had treated her like royalty when they had landed after the second launch. It wasn't right. He didn't deserve her.

"When we get back to Rocket Town," Cid leaned forward, lowering his voice so Shera would be the only one to her him but he knew Vincent would hear him anyway, "we have to have a long talk."

Shera blinked, did he know? Had he always known and that was why he had left the town? To get away from her and all the whispers that had been going on behind his back? All she could do was nod, that was all they could do right now, perhaps if she got him to speak openly of his feelings, she might get him back.

The words hadn't been said in anything resembling a mean tone, his voice gentle, as though he had resigned himself to a fate that he wasn't ready for. She cared for him but could she really be held responsible for destroying his life yet again?

Vincent blinked, unsure if he should accompny the pair back to Rocket Town. Perhaps it would be best for him if he just returned to the mansion's basement and just wait for his death the take him with open arms.

Would Cid allow him to go back to the mansion? Would he forget about him if he was asked to?

"I'll...remain here," Vincent finally said slowly.

Shera surprised both men gathered in front of her, "No. You...don't look at all well Mister Valentine. Come home with me and the captain, until you're feeling strong."

A soft smile played on the former's Turks lips, she was taking it better than expected. Did she belive the kiss had been innocent or was she merely trying to get on the captain's good side? He spared her a glance as he walked out of the hotel room, frowning as the woman's eyes darted away from his.

Was she tryng to figure out why she was allowing him to stay with them or was she planning on doing something that would ultimitley destroy all three lives that were involved in her own world?


	7. Chapter 7

**Rocket Town...**

Never in Cid's life had he ever had such an uncomfortable journey. The silence in the car had been painful, not one of them really knew what to say to each other. The conversation between himself and Shera had been rather strained, Cid's mind kept going over the kiss that Vincent had given him. He had thought about nothing else if he had to admit it.

Both men had leaned into each other, for a brief second, Cid had felt like it was so right. It was like he was meant to have been like this but at the same time, it felt like he was betraying Shera. When Vincent had pulled away, it hurt. When he had said that it had been bad call on his part, that had stung something.

The pilot clenched his fist, his stomach tying itself in knots as he tried to work out what was going wrong. Why hadn't his simple little plan of going to Nibelhiem and getting wasted with Vincent went according to to what it should? He deserved some kind of peace right?

Now that they were in the home, it was somewhat more bearable. At the very least they could all hide away. Cid had settled Vincent into his room and had made sure that the curtains were drawn tightly. The dark haired man had colapsed into the double bed and quickly drew the covers over his head, indicating to Cid that he didn't want to talk at all right now.

That suited the blonde just fine, he didn't want to talk either but he had another brunette in the home who seemed to be demanding that just that. He gazed at the bundled up covers and wished more than anything to join him.

_Join him? No...maybe I should hole myself up in his coffin and sleep for the next thirty odd years, _Cid thought as he walked out the room and into the kitchen, _then maybe everything would kinda work themselves out._

He paused as he looked back to the bedroom door, what was going on with Vincent? The guy had been fine the last time he had dropped him off, okay, quiet and reserved but that didn't mean anything. The former Turk just wasn't a big talker.

All the captain knew for certain was that the man was sick and it had something to do with Hojo. Unfortunately, the mad scientist was dead and the only helpful information that might be of use was back at the mansion or in the ruins of Midgar.

_So what do I do? Run back to the village, tear through the library and hope the hell that I find Hojo's personal diary with detailed plans on what the hell he did to Vince?_ Cid crossed his arms as he stared blankly into space for a few minutes, _all there is in Midgar now is the sick and wounded. The Shinra headquarters are pretty much destroyed but the lab might still be intact. I'll call Reeve in a couple of hours and Tifa to see how Spike's doing._

Travelling with AVALANCHE had taught the pilot a few useful skills and he used one of them to an amazing degree. He span round elegantly as a plate was hurled across the short space between the pilot and the mechanic. A cup and bowl quickly followed it and Cid wondered if the entire tea set would be joining it as well.

The well used tea pot crashed loudly against the wall, inches above the blonde's head. The sound made the captain duck and cover his head to protect it from the falling shards of china.

"Holy mother of..." Cid cried out in surprise, "Shera, calm the hell down will ya?!"

Shera stopped hurling the dinner set and panted angrily. Calm down? He expected her to calm down? After all he had put her through, he honestly expected her to sit back and say, 'it's alright captain. I understand?!'

No way was she going to do that. No way was she going to allow what happened in Nibelhiem to pass over without some kind of comment and allow Cid his usual retreat, he was going to listen to all her words and he was going to be the one slinking off and licking wounds.

"Calm down?" Shera stated as she hurled another cup, "You're a fine one to talk about calming down!"

Cid looked down at his feet and the shattered remains of the plates, cups and various other dinnerware. He'd never thrown anything at Shera, apart from hurtful words and a temper. He frowned before raising his gaze to met burning brown eyes.

"What's the big deal?" he asked quietly, "it was nothing but a harmless peck."

That earned him another broken bowl on the floor, "Big deal? You disappear and when I find you, you're kissing another man."

_It wasn't a proper kiss! _Cid rubbed his eyes tiredly, _stop over reacting._

"There's no point talking right now," the pilot stated as he knelt down to clean up the mess, "You're emotional and I haven't a clue as to what to tell you. I need time myself."

"Newsflash," Shera hissed in a voice that had never came from her before, "the world doesn't revolve around Captain Cid Highwind."

Cid raised an eyebrow, he never claimed that it did. People seemed to think that he had that kind of attitude but no one really saw the true him. No one saw the scared man who wanted to run and hide from the world when things really terrified him.

He was all swears, curses and insults. Acting angry to keep people the hell away from him had worked for nearly his entire adult life but now, it seemed to be failing. It seemed to bring people to him, people who wanted to help and sooth the pain they felt he had.

"Never claimed it did," Cid replied with a calm voice that was not his own feeling.

Lady Luck decided to grace the Highwind home, the phone began to ring. The rather one sided arguement ended when the pilot walked over to it, ignoring the look he recieved from Shera.

"Highwind," saying his last name when answering phones had became the norm for him, "...Reeve? What's up?"

The female mechanic crossed her arms, Cid hadn't raised his voice or cursed her. Had he really mellowed out to someone almost unrecognisable? No fire or passion could be seen in the blue orbs or even in the tired voice.

Vincent Valentine, the man who had been brought back from Nibelhiem seemed to be a different man from what had strolled into the town all those months back. He had been cool, calm and with more than a hint of a dangerous air about him. Looking every inch the cold blooded killer the Turks were known to be back when Shera had been growing up.

Now, there was still the danger about him but he looked so frail and fragile. Did the rest of AVALANCHE now look that like? Former shadows of themselves? She had spent time with Cloud, Cid and Vincent on the rocket. The captain had stared out of the small window with so much awe but at the same time, something had changed in those blue orbs.

As though he had been filled with a new purpose in life. Cloud had sat in silence, Shera couldn't tell what the young man was thinking about but it didn't matter. Vincent...he had said nothing to her since she had made her presence known. Was he still sulking about not being able to lift off the debris from the faulty oxygen tank?

"It's amazing ya damn cat, I was just thinking about you," Cid hissed in pain as he a tiny little splinter of china decided to embed itself in hands normally hidden by thick leather gloves.

Shera blinked back tears as she rubbed her stomach, it wasn't fair. Just when she thought she had the captain to herself, something like this happened.

Was he going to leave her again and head back to the city? To a place that was filled with death and pain? She listened to the rather one sided conversation, catching the look of mild annoyance settling before disappearing on Cid's face as he regarded the splinter in his thumb.

"Highwind and the Tiny Bronco are outta business for the forseeable future but," Cid chewed thoughtfully on his thumb, "I suppose I could get the airship up in the air within a couple of weeks and do the rest on route."

In a couple of weeks? No way was that going to be possible, to her, it was downright impossible. It had barely been a week since the planet had pulled through Meteor and the captain was being asked to come to the rescue yet again?

"Listen Reeve, it's the best I can do. I did have a life before you numbskulls crashed through it," Cid drawled as he looked over to Shera, "...well get a damn boat to bring the supplies to the damn city then! I aint an errand boy."

Shera said nothing as she left the kitchen to head to her own room, hating how her life seemed to have gotten more complicated since the arrival of AVALANCHE into the town. She understood the captain had a strong sense of loyalty and duty to those he cared for and she knew that the man wouldn't suddenly abandon those he had been involved with so heavily.

**Later that night...**

Vincent pulled the covers down from around him and sat up. His chest felt like it was being ripped from the inside out and his skull beginning a rather painful imploding cycle. Jealousy burned in his heart for a strange reason as his once again fevered mind played tricks on him.

He was back at the mansion and he could hear the voices of his past crash into his mind. The former Turk screamed in pain, trying his best to try and

ease the hurt he felt in his soul but it failed miserably.

Without thinking, he buried both his hands in his hair. He dug the metal tips of his left hand into his skull, anything to try and rid himself of the voices and perhaps of his miserable existence. It didn't work, his demons had already begun to try and heal the injuries that he tried to give himself. He stopped screaming as he tried to formulate a plan.

The door to the room opened and Vincent could swear that he could see Lucrecia standing there. Her face full of concern and fear as her eyes saw the blood spilling from the small cuts Vincent had inflicted on his scalp.

"Lucrecia...stay with me," he whispered softly at her, reaching his bloody claw and his pale hand to her.

She did but she seemed to hestitate, as though she was waiting for someone else to come behind her. Hojo. Vincent didn't need to be told twice about that he would follow with his usual sneer and make some comment about how the Turks were nothing but big girls.

Lucrecia slowly slipped her hands into his and said words that failed to reach Vincent's ears. The former Turk tried desperately to listen but he couldn't concentrate, his anger began burning when he saw Hojo linger at the doorway. He enterwined their fingers and ignored the small little gasp of pain as the metal claw bit into her hand.

He had her and he wasn't going to let her go. If anything, he would talk to her and make her see sense. To make her leave this town and move back to the city and civilization. When they were in Midgar, he would then inform President Shinra of the horrors that Hojo was planning and then that would end the

Jenova Project once and for all.

"Is he alright?" the scientist sneered as he regarded the scene.

Vincent closed his red eyes, "...I'm fine...just...fine."

Hojo seemed to ignore the words, just a hint of concern marred his features. The man crossed his arms as he took a single step in to the room, his actions strangely feminine and graceful. Vincent watched him intently for a few moments before returning his gaze back to his lover, why was Hojo allowing him to touch his fiancee in such a way?

"You don't look fine," Lucrecia replied quietly, "you're burning."

She raised her hand to his forehead and tried to gently push him back down onto the bed, "You need to rest, who knows what Hojo did to you."

_What Hojo did to you? _Vincent released Lucrecia from his hold and stood up, his emotions bubbling to the surface and he felt Chaos screaming to be let out, to heal the fever and restore sanity.

"What did you do to me?" Vincent hissed as he stalked over to Hojo.

The small scientist cowered, making the former Turk stop in surprise. In all his years in working with the vile man, Hojo never cowered. Lucrecia tried to stop Vincent from advancing but he held her back, he made the infamous man cower and he wasn't going to stop there. He was going to make sure he never took another breath again.

"I repeat," Vincent asked with a deadly calm, "Hojo, what did you do to me?"

"Nothing," Hojo pressed his body against the wall, his arm protecting his stomach while the other was outstretched and pleading, "I...I haven't done anything to you! I barely know you."

"LIAR!" Vincent roared in anger, he raised his hand, ready to backhand the scientist if he continued on with such obvious lies. How could the man claim not to know him? They had worked together for over seven years.

His blow never reached Hojo as Lucrecia had a burning look in her eyes as she held on his wrist, "What are you doing?!"

It felt like someone had placed an unwitting Vincent on a carousel and had shoved the blasted thing on fast forward. He fell forward into Lucrecia and he didn't expect the slender woman to hold his weight. She did or rather, he did.

"Vince," Cid's voice brought him back to the land of reality, "You aint back in the mansion. Hojo is dead and as far as I fucking know, Shera aint him."

Shera? Vincent looked to the corner of the room and his heart sank into oblivion, the woman looked absolutely petrified and he had caused that. He closed his eyes and leaned further into Cid, he should head back to the mansion and bury himself in his coffin.

"Shera," Cid whispered over Vincent's head, "take off that coat."

Quickly, Shera tried to shed the white lab coat but her fingers failed to respond to her commands. Scared tears spilled from her eyes as she felt so frustrated at not being able to do as the captain had asked. She tried to figure out the names that Vincent had called them. Cid funnily enough had been Lucrecia and she had been called Hojo.

Even though she didn't know who Lucrecia was, the woman obviously held a large part of Vincent's heart. A lost love? Someone who Vincent cared for and had let down in the past? She didn't need to guess who Hojo was. That man was a horrible person, even the few times Shera had encountered him when she and the captain had been summoned to the Shinra Headquarters in Midgar, she always felt like she needed a shower afterwards.

Anything to get rid of the stench of evil and death that seemed to linger around the professor like a shroud.

Cid got to his feet and crossed the short distance to her. Vincent was left sitting on the floor, staring at it with numbness. The captain helped Shera unbutton her shirt, ignoring how his fingers on his right hand stung with the cuts he had recieved when Vincent had tightly held onto his hand. Blood

flowed from the wounds and Cid wiped his hand on the back of his jogging pants.

"I'm sorry," Cid softly said, "he never meant to scare you or raise his hand."

When Shera saw the blood, she instantly went into mother hen mode. She held the captain's hand lightly and began to pull him out of the bedroom, wanting him to be as far away from Vincent as possible but Cid stayed. It frustrated the engineer that he was more willing to stay with that dangerous man than her.

"You're bleeding," Shera replied in the same quiet way, "and...he's dangerous. Cid, I'm sorry but I don't want him here."

Blue eyes looked at her with surprise, Shera was kicking Vincent out? She was kicking out a sick man because she was scared? Cid looked back to Vincent and then decided that he was going to the mansion straight away. Work on the Highwind had already started and the people working on it didn't need his help. They were all capable.

"No," Cid stated, "he's staying. Shera, he needs our help."

_He needs you, _Shera wanted to scream but she shook her head. Nothing could sway the captain once he had made his mind up about something. No matter if it hurt everyone around him. Shera walked away but not before looking Cid directly in the eye, hoping to catch an emotion in his eyes that had been missing towards her.

This wasn't the man who had left the town with AVALANCHE, wasn't the same man who had made the space launch a success. His eyes seemed to have none of the same life she knew, the way he carried himself and the way he spoke. Had Cid Highwind died in the battle to save the planet and this, this imposter had taken his place?

Shera shook her head sadly the man in front of her avoided her look, "...and who's going to help you?"

A confident snort and a shrug of the shoulder came from the pilot, "I don't need help."

Cid watched Shera leave the room and he sighed wearily. Who indeed was going to help him? Vincent wasn't able to and Shera didn't seem to understand. He didn't need help, he needed time and space. Cid rubbed his face before returning his attention back to Vincent who hadn't moved or made any indication that he had heard Shera asking him to leave.

_What the hell was he seeing? Why the hell call me Lucrecia? I am not that weird ass girl from the waterfall, _Cid knelt infront of the former Turk and tapped him lightly on the knee.

"The hell was that about?"

"I didn't mean to hurt you..." Vincent apologised but he still couldn't see his world clearly, "Lucrecia...Cid...I..."

"Get some sleep," Cid ordered as he pulled him to his feet. He wasn't getting involved in any demonic nightmares or horrific past secrets right now and perhaps he should just allow Vincent a few hours mumbling incoherantly to wear himself out.

"...what did you do to me? Why can't I get you out of my head?" Vincent looked directly at the pilot, crimson eyes full of emotions that Cid knew he should be feeling himself to a degree, "why are you so warm yet so cold? So near that I can touch you but so far far away? Lucrecia...tell me..."

Cid didn't know what he could do, his heart screamed as Vincent seemed to look to him for answers that a dead woman could only give. Could he give him the answers or at least, soothe a broken soul to sleep by pretending to be something he so clearly wasn't?

The pilot helped Vincent back into the bed and placed his hand on a tear stained cheek, "It's okay, Vincent, it's okay."

Vincent leaned further into the touch, his mind for the moment believing that his Lucrecia was stitting in the room with him instead of Captain Cid Highwind, he closed his eyes and held onto the hand that offered some kind of relief from the madness that the world gave.

"Answer me," Vincent pleaded, "please..."

"I'm right here," Cid kept his breathing steady as he screamed inside at himself for indulging a sick mind, "I'm not leaving you. Not again, not ever but please...darling...get some sleep."

Darling, was that something Lucrecia would have called Vincent? As unwilling as Cid was about playing Lucrecia, he wasn't going to start saying snookie kins or koochie woochie or some other crap like that. Darling seemed to be the safe option.

"Promise me something," Vincent asked as he fell back into the waiting bed.

Cid raised an eyebrow, "Yeah...yes?"

"Don't stay with him just because you're expecting his child," the request was slightly slurred as sleep was claiming another victim, "stay because you really love him not out of duty..."

"Promise," the pilot stood up to leave but not before for some reason that he couldn't or didn't want to admit to, he leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on Vincent's forehead, "Sleep now...my dear Vincent."

Cid walked out quietly, he took a shaky breath as he came to see Shera standing at the back door. The woman gazing into the darkness that had fallen over the town, a first aid kit sat waiting to be used on the kitchen table.

The pilot's vision blurred as he fumbled in his attempt at trying to patch his hand up. The plaster kept slipping from his grip and the antisceptic cream stung like a bitch, a full blown frustrated sob was brewing below the surface but Cid tried his best to keep it from rising.

"Why aren't you crying or getting angry or feeling something?" Shera asked quietly from her position at the door, "you can't just feel feel nothing. You've been through the hell and came out the other side, so why are you acting like nothing happened?"

Cid stopped still, he didn't know there was a set procedure that one had to follow after saving the world. There was things that he hadn't came to terms with himself yet. Nobody had handed the group the 'So, you've saved the planet, now this is what you do' manual after they had landed in Junon.

"...sadness, anger, frustration, grief," Cid listed off a few of the emotions he had experienced while fighting the brave fight, "humility, joy. I've felt them."

Shera turned round partly, "So what's stopping you feeling them now?"

Cid didn't say anything but he closed his eyes, remembering when he had actually made the decision to not feel anything until everything had been done. Until the world was safe and sound. It hadn't been that much of a special day, just a heart wrenching one that he still couldn't bring himself to cry about.

It was a look and the entire body body language of the blonde captain that told the members of AVALANCHE that there was bad news to be shared with them. They all sat patiently, waiting outside of the Forgotten City, wondering where Cid, Vincent and Cloud had disappeared to.

**The day Aeris died...**

Every step that Cid Highwind took seemed to be a struggle and an extreme effort, his cheeks burning red and his mouth set in a thin grim line. He didn't look happy or even willing to talk. Vincent Valentine followed closely behind, his dark hair covering his red eyes and he copied the walk almost step for step.

"What happened? Did ya find that a'hole Sephiroth?" Barret growled as he stood to greet the men.

"We found 'em," Cid whispered almost silently, he took a deep breath and held it in.

Tifa stood up, frowning. What had happened? Was Cloud okay? Were they all okay? Vincent had turned round and was looking back to where they had came from, his head lowered as though in silent prayer. Cid looked either ready for crying or for kicking the crap out of the first monster to cross his path.

"What happened?" Tifa asked as she ran a hand through her chocolate coloured hair, "Cid? Vincent? What did Sephiroth do?"

"...as to be expected when dealing with an abomination," Vincent's voice actually cracked and he stopped talking. His shoulders heaving for a long moment before settling back into the normal rythm.

It was Nanaki who asked where Cloud was and his answer was Cid pointing back to where they had came from, his arm shaking. Nanaki sniffed the air and he could smell the sadness and grief emanate from the pilot and the former Turk. Someone had lost their life. Someone close to the group judging by the actions of his team mates.

_Why her? Why that sweet little flower girl? _Cid thought as he released his breath, his entire body shook in fury and he wanted to scream, to hit something or say something but nothing seemed to satisfy that pain.

He looked to Vincent and raised an eyebrow, a single tear had managed to find a course down the deathly pale cheek of his friend. His crimson eyes staring at a single flower that had been trampled on by the heavy booted feet of Barret or perhaps by one of them when they had raced to the Forgotten city's delicate insides to reach Aeris.

_That Sephiroth...his life aint gonna be worth jack shit when I get my hands on the bastard, _Cid vowed as he looked to Tifa, how could he tell her that the flower girl from the slums had been slain by the phyco Sephiroth and that Cloud was on the verge of a breakdown cause of it?

"Ya'll better sit down," Cid said softly, "I got some bad news."

The assembled group looked at each other, worried glances exchanged but they all did as they were told. Cait Sith kept darting his gaze to Vincent who hadn't moved and why the normally loud and cussing Cid had suddenly devolped a strange sense of elequencey.

Yuffie sat with her legs crossed, her throat going suddenly dry. She had a sinking feeling and suddenly didn't want to hear what the pilot had to say. If they found Sephiroth and now had bad news...did that mean Cloud was died? He couldn't possibly mean that...

"Aeris is dead," Cid vocalised the thought Yuffie didn't want, his voice gruff and straining against unshed tears.

Tifa shook her head, "You're lying...you...stop kidding around..."

Tears welled in Cid's eyes but the pilot wiped them away, "I really wish I was. Sephiroth caught us by surprise. We couldn't get to her in time."

Barret slammed his fist into the ground, "Why the hell not?!"

"Sephiroth started trying to use Cloud first, trying to get the kid to do his own damn dirty work but when that didn't work," Cid didn't understand why the

large man was getting pissed at him, he wasn't the one who killed her. It was Sephiroth. It was that guy's fault, not his. If Barret was gonna get angry then it should be at Sephiroth.

_He aint pissed at you blondie, _came a reasonable voice, _it really is a case of shooting the messenger._

Vincent picked up, his voice cold and emotionless, "Sephiroth ran her threw with his blade. Her death was painless."

Barret seemed to snap at hearing the way Vincent had said that, like the way one would state if a friend's child hamster had died due to old age. Like Aeris was a complete stranger to them instead of a valuable part of the team.

The captain was pushed out of the way as Barret stormed towards Vincent, Cid crying out in surprise as he realised where Barret was heading. Yuffie was the one to stop the man from gaining more than a few feet. Her brown eyes streaming with tears.

"Stop it," the ninja thief stated, "hitting Vincent aint gonna bring her back."

"Couldn't get to her in time huh? Typical Shinra bastards," Barret growled in anger but it was Vincent who reacted to the name calling.

The former Shinra member had unsheathed his gun and was pointing it rather steadily at the AVALANCHE founder, "Do not speak of which you know little about you idiot."

"For christ..." Cid stepped between the two men, hoping that Vincent was going to pull the trigger. Would make his life a whole lot simplier. He wouldn't need to deal with the fall out of this horrible situation right now.

"Pair of you. Knock it off. Vincent, he's upset. He's an idiot but he's upset. Barret...Sephiroth tore through her. There was no way we could get to her, especially when he dropped one of his freaky little Jenova things on us."

Tifa watched the three men. Vincent was surprisingly emotional, Cid was being as cool as a cucumber and Barret was just acting like Barret. Had Cid shed tears when he was making his way to the group or was he simply putting them aside to act as leader for the moment?

Aeris was dead though, no matter who said what or who did what. It was upsetting and heartrenching at the same time. They had all spoken to the young woman, told her about hopes and dreams and now Aeris would no longer be apart of their lives.

A special young woman who managed to endear herself to everyone she encountered, even the Tseng from the Turks had a respect for her. People fell in love with her as soon as they met her. Vincent even managed a few smiles when she was around but Tifa had a feeling that the smiles were more for Cid rather than Aeris.

"Is Cloud okay?" Tifa asked quietly, "Is he with her?"

"He needs a little time," Cid replied, "he's kinda...he's ah..."

_Fine time to lose the ability to speak when normally you can strip paint with your foul language, _came a quite reasonable voice in his mind that seemed to sound a lot like Vincent in the elegancy of it.

"Give him time," Cid shrugged weakly.

Vincent reholstered his weapon, watching his travelling companion. Those words to the group were the first he had said in the past hour since the death of Aeris and he hadn't cursed once. Something very unusual for a man known for his swears.

He however had let his emotions run away with him. Words from Barret normally wouldn't affect him but now, seeing a death he could have prevented had cracked in his skull and all he could see right now was the same scene playing over and over. Another nightmare to add to his collection, along with the pained cry from Cloud. Cid had done nothing but his entire body language tensed and the normally open face became guarded.

_The chief is acting like me and I him, _Vincent thought, _role reversal._

Cid seemed to be taking the role of leader right now, "Listen, Vincent and I are gonna head back. We're gonna rest up and then follow Sephiroth."

"So again we are to split up?" Nanaki offered, not really thrilled with the idea about more of his friends going off and possibly being killed.

"Not for long though," Cid replied with forced cheerfulness, "Sephiroth said summit about heading over snowy fields to the north. That's our next plan when we rest up."

Yuffie surprised everyone by latching onto the first person she could before she broke into a sob that tore at the groups collective hearts. She hugged Cid tightly and hated how the man didn't know how to react to her. She felt two gloved hand lightly press against her back and rub it gently as Cid found the actions.

No way could Aeris be dead, wasn't possible. Not in a million years, Cloud and the others wouldn't allow it but it had. The death had even managed to crack the tough shell of Vincent. Without thinking, she began hitting the pilot's chest unsure why but she felt angry, Cid took it.

She didn't fight it when Cid passed the ninja onto Tifa, knowing that she would recieve the proper care from the older woman. It wasn't right, nothing about this whole situation was right.

"Barret," Cid lost the gruffness, his military training kicking in, allowing his own personal thoughts to be shoved into the blackness of his numbed mind, "Can ya'll look after the others? I wanna get back to Cloud and head out as soon as possible."

The pilot pulled out a cigarette and stuffed it back into his pack, the flower girl was constantly bitching about his smoking. Saying it would shorten his life and she didn't want that. He lowered his gaze to his scuffed boots and growled softly.

_Damn...why the hell did I even agree to this shit? _he asked as he made his way back to the resting place of Aeris Gainsborough, he lifted his gaze to see Vincent battling with tears falling from crimson eyes.

_And why the hell am I acting like Vincent? Like my face is made of stone, _Cid shook his head clear, _aww man...I hate it when I start doing shit like this, thinking feelings...man, it aint me._

"You alright?" Cid asked Vincent quietly, "Ya aint gonna breakdown on me?"

Vincent cleared his throat and stared down at his boots, "I'm fine. You?"

"...right as rain," Cid mumbled as he shoved his hands into his pockets, he wanted to cry. Wanted to scream but that wasn't going to solve a damn thing except getting him carted off to the local loony bin.

The pilot looked to the small shack with the lake, spotting Cloud instantly. The swordman staring mournfully into the crystal clear water and Cid never wanted to feel like that at all. Just wasn't his style.

His normal way of dealing with pain was to swear and belittle it until it went away. Not something that was going to be useful, he walked side by side with Vincent, the gun man saying nothing but he kept his gaze on his feet.

_If falling in love and losing love is like that, _Cid frowned as they reached Cloud, _then I think I'll pass. Mind you...Vincent seems to have the right idea bout feeling nothing._

The fight with Sephiroth had taken a new meaning, this was revenge. He had killed Aeris, taken hold of something called the Black Materia and Aeris had said something about him being able to use it to call the ultimate black magic. A magic that was powerful enough to destroy the entire planet or wound it at least.

Cid placed his grief to the back of his mind, filing the emotion under 'feel it later when this is over'.

**Corel...**

Today could have turned out a lot worse and Cid decided that it did. Forget about the heart stopping train ride that threatened to destroy Corel he had managed to stop just a few short hours back. Forget about the host of fresh bruises that were forming on his body and the knee that kept screaming in pain from the rough jumps from carriage to carriage.

He had run out of his cigarrettes and he was ready for tearing his hair out if he didn't get one. He paced the small room of the inn like a caged tiger, ready to pounce on the first thing that snapped his nerve.

The pilot ran his hand through his hair, sitting for a split second on the bed before leaping off it. The sound of an approaching train had startled the hell out of him and he raced to the door, expecting Vincent or Barret to burst through. They didn't but Cid couldn't settle for the night.

He walked out of the inn, his mind unsure as to where he should be walking. His mind kept tumbling over things he couldn't deal with, no matter how hard he tried to keep it quiet. Everything on the ground was just becoming to damn crowded and now, with Meteor looming ever closer, so was his sky.

_That was a close one, _he thought, _far too damn close._

He took a deep breath, enjoying how fresh it felt in his lungs. It was like tasting the breath of a new life, the town of Corel had finally decided to make an effort in trying to make sure that the place stood a chance of survival. It was kinda humbling to know that he had been a part of the mood change.

"CIIIIIIIIIIDDD!!" Yuffie screeched through the dusty village, instantly breaking that fragile little nerve that the pilot had managed to cling onto.

The captain of the Highwind lowered his head and prayed that this encounter was going to be rather short and sweet but he knew, that with Yuffie, things were never sweet or short.

The young shinobi was dragging a reluctant Vincent behind her and Cid spared the dark haired man a look. Vincent was a mystery to the pilot and Cid didn't understand why he was so interested in trying to be friends with the man. He shunned every attempt but seemed to come back looking for some kind of attention from the pilot, even if it was just a look or a glance.

Vincent's actions were completely at odds with his words.

"What is it?" Cid asked, "I mean, thought I told you idiots to go and relax."

Yuffie smiled broadly, "Well yeah but Vincent was looking miserable and so were you so I thought we could all go to the Gold Saucer or something. Seeing how you didn't wanna go to the party that's being held in our honour."

Vincent was looking miserable? If he was being dragged around by a loud and annoying little brat, then he would look miserable. Cid cleared his throat, unsure if he wanted to really get involved with the pair.

"Not interested," the pilot stated, "I said relax and I think Valentine's idea of relaxing is somewhere far away from you. Somewhere quiet."

Vincent flashed him a grateful look that lasted a few seconds before his usual mask of stoicism returned. Yuffie took no notice and wasn't aware of the subtle look, she was far too interested in trying to get the two men outside and having some kind of fun.

_Why doesn't he just turn into the Death Gigas or the Hellmasker thing and scare the hell outta her? _Cid thought as he crossed his arms, somehow knowing that the ninja from Wutai wasn't going to leave his room until she either got what she wanted or until Cid lost his temper.

"Oh come on," Yuffie took hold of the pilot's wrist and began to tug him out of the room, "It's too nice a night to be a complete misery guts. Anyhow, Vincent is supposed to be the dull and depressing one. Not you Captain Foulmouth."

"I'm not dull and depressing," Cid gritted through his teeth, "Yuffie, if ya hadn't noticed, we aint exactly got time to be messing around playing musical statues at stupid parties. We got to get the Huge Materia from Fort Condor next and I sure as hell aint going with half the team hungover. We need sharp minds for this game."

The ninja stopped for a moment, "Not saying that we should get hammered but we shouldn't just let this fall over us. We gotta keep our spirits up and we do this by partying!"

"Yuffie," Cid growled as he sharply removed his hand from her, "Bugger off. I aint interested in playing with ya and right now, I have other things on my mind instead of 'hmm, how can I have fun?' okay? The world's about to be destroyed an' all _you _care about is where the next materia is going and stealing from the idiots in this town!"

Yuffie blinked as she released Vincent, her eyes growing huge. Cid crossed his arms as he looked at the young teen and a small part of him really did feel sorry. There had been no real need to say those things but he was hurting just as much as everyone else.

He was tired, bruised and sore, the last thing he wanted was to go out and socialise with the people of the town or the rest of the team. Vincent said nothing but even Cid saw the look of the former Turk. One of 'fair-point-but-did-you-really-need-to-go-that-far?' and Cid felt about two inches tall.

"Yuffie..." Cid sighed softly.

"No no," the shinobi shook her head and took a step back, "It's okay. Really, but you know, perhaps I really do know what's going on and I just don't want to lose anyone else right now. So yeah, I do think about having some kind of fun but that's because I don't know the next time I'll be able to have it. I know the world might end but being stressed out isn't going to help anyone. So, you go ahead and mope, I'm going to have some kind of fun before we head off to Fort Condor tomorrow."

The pilot hung his head in shame as the young teenager walked away. He cursed himself for his own stupidity but no matter how hard he tried to find blame in something else, he couldn't. It was down to him, he was the one who had said that.

"Do not blame yourself," Vincent offered quietly "Yuffie will probably forget your words."

"Shouldn't have said 'em," Cid returned, "Kid was just trying to boost morale. I didn't have to say those things to her."

"It's not your fault," Vincent began to walk away, "She probably knows the stress we are all under and felt that she was responsible for making sure we don't do anything stupid. She's an intelligent young woman who can understand that what was said was merely a vent, not a personal attack."

The pilot didn't have a responce, he simply threw his hands in the air and made a strangled sound in the back of his throat as he headed back into the inn. He knew that but it still didn't mean that his words hadn't hurt the young woman's feeling. He couldn't allow his feelings to keep pushing to the front and controlling his mouth right now. He vowed silently that when this was all over, when he had the chance to apologise to Yuffie, he would. Until that time came, he just filed it under the ever growing, I'll feel it later pile.

**Present**

The pilot rose to his feet, he was planning on avoiding this conversation with her. He shook his head and wandered over to the clean washing pile that sat on top of the battered looking machine. Cid smiled softly as he pulled out his favourite t-shirt and combats. If he was going to kick the shit out of the mansion then he was going to do it in comfort.

Shera turned round fully in time to see Cid disappearing into the bathroom only to return a few short moments fully dressed. Blonde hair ruffled by a mixture of sleep and having a top that had been full of static from the tumble dryer.

"You're leaving?!" Shera cried out in surprise, she didn't want to be left alone with Vincent, not if he was freaking out.

"Long as the weather holds right, I shouldn't be gone for long," Cid stated as he grabbed hold of the Venus Gospel, "I promise."


	8. Chapter 8

**Nibelhiem...**

Tifa Lockheart walked slowly through the town, getting her bearing back after being away for so long. Nothing had really changed apart from a sporty little number that sat outside the mansion. Nobody in town could afford one of them. The car looked vaguely familiar, she was pretty sure she had seen it from somewhere before and she wasn't much of a car person.

She headed over to the inn, hoping to get a room for the night before getting on with the task at gathering a few personal belongings to take back to the city. Her dark eyes wandered over to the mansion and she spared a thought to the soul who resided in the building. Would he be there now or had the nightmares that lingered forced Vincent to run for cover?

Tifa lifted her gaze higher and her vision filled with the cold and evil mountains that was so clearly evident. Rocket Town was a few hours from Nibelhiem if you took a boat but nearly a day if you travelled via the mountains.

She missed not having the team together even though the group fought more often than not. She really felt lonely now that she no longer woke up to the various different accents and tones that the members of AVALANCHE had. Everything to a drawl of Corel to the undefinable accent of Vincent.

A chocobo warked and a familiar figure elegantly got off the bird, not noticing that he wasn't the only member of AVALANCHE to grace the town with his presence. Tifa watched as the blonde seemed to make a beeline for the mansion at a bolt, was Vincent in trouble?

Tifa raced closely behind him and crashed into the back of the pilot as he stopped suddenly at the gates. Cid turned round and looked at her with a rather curious expression, his blue eyes seeming to catch the barely visiable sun.

"Hey," Tifa offered sheepishly, "um...hi."

Cid smiled at her, "Hi. What brings you here?"

"I have a house here," Tifa admitted, she pointed to a house near the well, "just stopping by to pick up some stuff. How bout you?"

Her heart skipped a beat as Cid regarded her with the same look he had done on the airship, same vunerable eyes and the same jacket Tifa had melted in when it had started to rain. Had he came just for her or was there another real reason for his presence. She was disappointed when he confirmed the latter answer.

The pilot paled a little before flashing her a smile that Tifa knew well, "Research."

The martial artist gave the house a dark look, the only thing to research in that place was death. If it was research, then why didn't he ask Vincent for assistance? Nobody in the group knew the secrets of the mansion as well as he did. He'd probably buried a few in the basement.

She felt the cold wind and the beginning of rain on her face, usual weather for this time of year but she still hated it. Cid didn't seem to even notice it but he growled as he looked at the mansion himself.

"I know what you're thinking," Cid nudged her lightly.

Tifa raised an eyebrow, that she doubted. The pilot seemed to be oblivious to everything around him and he didn't look as good as he did when they had left each other. He seemed to change when they had dropped Vincent off.

"Once I find out what I need," the captain admitted quietly to her, "I'm kicking the shit outta this house. Care to join me in melting marshmallows over the burning husk of this place?"

"Sure," Tifa found herself wanting to be held in Cid's arms again, like he had done when she thought she had lost Cloud but knew it wasn't to be.

"Gimme a couple of hours," Cid offered her a smile again, "I'll see you at the inn okay?"

Tifa left the captain and watched in concern as he walked past the gate and to the large ornate doors. What the hell could he really be researching? Was he helping Vincent out with something?

"Captain?" she called out after him.

The blonde stopped, "What?"

"Where's Vincent?" Tifa found it strange that the blonde would be travelling anywhere without the former Turk lurking nearby, infact, it was pretty unusual.

No matter where Cid went, Vincent would follow, like a puppy. A discreet little puppy but followed none the less.

"...he's..." that made Cid think about the answer, could he really say, 'cracked and out to lunch'?

"He stopped by and told me that he wanted this place burned to the ground," Cid stated with as much confidence as he could muster on the lie, "he couldn't do it due to the...emotions that stirred...in...his...ah shit. Hey, where's Cloud?"

Tifa crossed her arms, "I don't know. He came back to Midgar with me but disappeared. I think he needs time but he didn't look so great."

_So Spike aint doing so hot either..._Cid felt a little bit of smugness as he felt that perhaps his own theory on Jenova had been right, perhaps Vincent's current break was due to the alien cells dying away but he still wanted to be sure.

"Just be careful," Tifa replied as she walked away, "I'm gonna pass on the marshmallows, I want to get in and out as quickly as I can but it was good to

see you. Give my love to Vincent when you see him, same with Shera."

Blue eyes narrowed for a few seconds, clouding over for about the same time. Obviously something about that statement had hit a nerve with him and she wasn't sure what she could do. He had turned her down as a partner and the she was simply happy to have him as a friend.

In no way did she want to remain in the town for as long as she had to. To much pain and death had been seen and the town stank of the pain. To her, her real home, her real life had been burned to ashes when Sephiroth had discovered the truth about his creation.

**Inside the mansion...**

Nothing. Zip, nada, zilch. That was what his search of the mansion had brought him. Nothing but a tickly throat and numerous papercuts on his hands. He frowned as he sat at the old oak desk that resided in the underground lab. He sneezed as dust assualted his senses as he threw another book down into the pile he had classed as 'much use as a chocolate fireguard'.

Not one of the books on the desk seemed to indicate what Hojo had done to Vincent, not a solitary one. It frustrated him but he knew he would need to look harder for his answers. He didn't even know how long he had remained down in the dusty little lab for.

Cold shivers raced down his spine as he tried to ignore the big and cobweb covered operating table that could be clearly seen from where he was sitting. He could just about make out the dusty and rusting scapels and needles that Hojo probably used to screw up the heads and bodies of Cloud, that guy

who Cloud had hung out with and Vincent.

Keeping the images of what Hojo had done to one of his few close friends burned his soul as he stood up and made his way to the table in the main room. The green glass tubes had scratch marks from where the guy Zack had written the escape plan and had tried to communicate with the young Strife.

_What the fuck didn't Hojo do to people? I fucking bet he was the devil, _Cid thought harshly as he picked up a dusty book that resided on the operating table.

He sat himself up on the table and rather uncomfortably laid back on it, closing his eyes as he tried to imagine the fear and pain that Vincent had felt.

Anything to try and figure out why the raven haired gunman was currently going mental on him. It didn't work, all it got him was some minor back pain and some very weird feelings.

_Okay...relax and let the feelings or whatever come through, _Cid shifted his weight again and his booted feet brushed against the ankles straps. He chewed his lip thoughtfully for a moment and slowly slipped his hands in the wrist restraints, suddenly glad yet very self conscious that nobody was around or even living in the mansion.

_He must have just waited here, _the pilot guessed as he heard his own heartbeat, _waiting for that bastard to come and finish off what horrible shit he did._

The Shinra pilot kept his eyes closed as he tried to listen to the past footsteps of the occupants that lived in the house. It was so quiet, nothing stirred. Any monsters that normally remained in the house had disappeared, was that due to Vincent clearing house?

He remained still, not wanting to ruin the feeling that had formed in the room. Not quite calm and peaceful but neither was it painful or creepy. A strange mix between them and he found himself dozing off in the weird position he had placed himself into.

The coldness of the metal table seeped through his shirt and he sat back up, deciding that he really didn't want Hojo's ghost strolling in on his ass and deciding to possess it. The pilot shook his head at the thought, not likely to happen but the creepy feeling he had while in the basement began to grow.

He picked the book he had found up and decided to read at least a few pages of it, his eyes widened as he discovered that within a few sentences, he saw Vincent's name.

_Subject's name: Vincent Valentine is being prepped and readied for the next step of the procedure, one that is intended to be used on the Jenova experiement. Infusing Mako and the alien DNA of Jenova together to make a being that is able to stand high and intense periods of pain. This will be required to allow the other alien DNA being created to place in the body of that male subject. (see vd recording 4e)_

_The alien cells, hereby known as 'Gallian,' 'Death Gigas', 'Hellmasker,' and 'Chaos' are violent and vicious with little regards to living creatures, if the procedure holds well then it may be possible to create warriors with the specific task of just hunting and killing. Essentially to create a super soldier just made for suicide war missions._

_Day four: Subject Male Vincent Valentine: subject does not appear to be holding the form of the 'Chaos' beast. Appears to be in pain, adjusted the amount of Mako to counter but he remains screaming. When in the form of Chaos, his left arm remains human instead of the demon like limbs and like the other three alien DNA, seems to have a personality. (see vd recording 32g, 33f, 34d and 35s.)_

_'Chaos' is crueler than that of the other three. It has decided that the human flesh is something of a snack and has began to tear away at it. (see vd recording 43a) The subject screams in pain when he transforms back into his own form and since then, it is advisable to remove the limb to prevent infection and to replace it with a substance..._

Cid closed the book, his stomach turning. Hojo's little diary of his horrors on Vincent and the sick son of a bitch decided to tape the torture as well. Had he seriously hoped to create the ultimate warrior by infecting people with the DNA of the demons that cursed Vincent?

_Least I found something, _Cid shivered as he slid off the table, placing the book in the large pocket in his pair of combats.

As much as he hated to admit to it, his own sick sense of curiousity had been sparked. What exactly did Hojo do the the former Turk? Cid walked over to what he guessed was where the mad scientist kept the recordings but found the cabinet empty. Everything had been moved away.

_Shit...probably taken to the Shinra Headquarters,_ the pilot cursed, _mind you...headin' out there anyhow..._

Cid stopped though and thought about that. Would Hojo really take evidence that he was a sick and twisted little git back home with him? No then it must mean that the evidence was still in the mansion. Which room had that man lived in?

Without thinking, he raced out of the room but not before another thought struck him. Wouldn't he want to have it hidden? If people came raiding the mansion after it had been abandoned, then Hojo wouldn't want to have any kind of link back to him. Desperate people did desperate things when it came to blackmail so maybe, just maybe the tapes had been locked away with Vincent. Locked away in that room filled with coffins and skeletons.

He slowly headed to the door that lead to the room Cloud had found Vincent in and stepped through, his heart thundering in his chest as he wondered what else he would encounter. Perhaps Vincent wasn't the only experiement...he stopped himself there. Vincent Valentine was no experiment.

He was human and had been held hostage by a lunatic who enjoyed hurting people. He was also sick and scared back home in Rocket Town, the guy needed a friend and Cid realised that he hadn't even told Vincent where he was going. Simply upped and left.

"Better head back home," the sound of his voice echoed around the corridor and it sounded so hollow to him. Not like what he did a few months back.

**Rocket Town...**

Vincent rubbed his eyes tiredly before deciding that staying at the Highwind household was not a very good idea. Shera had avoided him, not wanting anything to do with him. Her brown eyes filled with fear and panic when he had entered the kitchen though the woman had done a rather good job at keeping her face neutral.

He sat on the edge of Cid's bed, taking in the different knick knacks that were scattered across the room. A toy rocket rested on the floor, broken in two and Vincent recognised it as the Shinra Rocket Number 26. Photographs littered the area around it and Vincent sighed.

He leaned over and picked one up, the snapshot showing an image of a moment in AVALANCHE's little trip to save the planet. One where Cid and Yuffie were both in the huff with each other and Vincent didn't know who was trying to act up more. Cid's bottom lip was pouting and he couldn't help the look of laughter in blue eyes.

_A far cry from what we have now..._Vincent placed the picture down and stood up, _he came to me looking for help and this is how I act. I feel so weak and pathitic...no wonder you all want to die..._

_We do not wish to die either Valentine, _Chaos spoke up, _but we don't always get what we want in life._

_I can kill myself now? _Vincent asked the winged beast, _if I do not have your healing powers then I can kill myself without fear of being brought back can I not?_

Chaos seemed to hestitate at the answer, _...you want death?_

_More than life, _Vincent replied, _I have nothing. Cid is going to be with Shera, she is going to have his child and I am a danger to all those around me. It is better for all that I die along with you._

A timid knock brought Vincent out of his conversation and Shera popped her head through the door, "Mr...Mister Valentine? I'm...I'm making some tea, would you care for some?"

Crimson eyes stared for a moment at her before he stood up, she was still offering friendship after he had scared her earlier? He nodded and felt some relief that Cid was going to be waiting at the table. Shera held a bundle of clothes to him from her position at the door, her arms shaking.

"I thought you might like to change into something a little warmer..." she whispered quietly, "I also made some food for you."

Slowly, Vincent took a step forward. Shera flinched and the action tore at his heart. Tears threatened to flood his vision but Vincent raised his head and forced a small and grateful smile to his lips.

"Thank you Shera," he said softly.

Shera nodded and closed the door after her, clear that she wasn't feeling to comfortable with the entire situation.

Vincent looked at the clothes and realised that they were Cid's. He was highly doubtful that they would fit but Cid did have long legs, maybe the sweatpants would fit. A warm and soft t-shirt was also provided, along with clean underwear and a pair of socks.

He quickly changed and he couldn't help the feeling of contentment as he took a deep breath of the t-shirt he was wearing. Cid or rather Shera had used a fresh smelling detergent, one that smelled like fresh, open air. He looked down at himself and his breath caught when he saw the metal arm.

Without thinking, he turned round to the chest of drawers and began to lightly dig through them, looking for a jumper he could pull on top of the t-shirt.

Nothing in the top drawer, nor in the middle but the second drawer from the bottom made his search fruitful. He pulled out the largest he could find and tugged it on. It smelled different, like Cid had wore it for a few hours and had pulled it off when he had went to bed, forgetting to throw it in the washing bundle.

Vincent left the safety of the room and spotted Shera in the kitchen, lightly rubbing her stomach. Her attention was drawn to it and Vincent watched for a few moments, Lucrecia had never done that. The motherly look of love that was so clear on Shera's face right now had been missing on the mother of Sephiroth.

"How far along are you?" Vincent asked quietly as he entered the kitchen, his sense of smell being taken instantly by the hot food sitting on the table.

Shera looked at him with a closed look for a moment before allowing a smile to reach her lips, "...a few months. Not felt a kick yet, I'm feeling a little eager for it though."

"...congratulations," Vincent offered as he took his seat.

A soft snort was his reply from the mechanic, "Yeah...yay for me. Cid doesn't even know and he's gonna blow a...well...I don't know what he'll do. Probably deny it's his."

Vincent stopped as he reached for his tea, "He knows. He's not stup...I mean, he mentioned you were pregnant. He seems quite excited at the thought."

The closed look fell back over Shera's face, "That's twice you have lied to me. Stop it."

_Twice...? Oh..._ Vincent diverted his gaze to the floor, "Sorry."

Shera snorted lightly as she gently nudged over a plate filled with food over to Vincent. He looked as skinny as the captain and looked about as happy with it as well. He looked so pale, so deathly pale and Shera wondered want kind of life he had before he encountered AVALANCHE.

She gave him the once over, noticing the jumper he had on. It was one of Cid's favorite and he would wear it whenever he felt low or had a cold or something. Strange that the dark haired male would pick that one out.

"Mr Valentine..." Shera started but was interupted.

"Please...my name is Vincent," the dark haired male replied.

Shera rubbed her bump thoughtfully, trying to word her next question carefully but she wanted to know. She wanted to know a lot of things actually, what Vincent thought he was playing at, how long he intended on staying and did he honestly think that he stood a chance at Cid?

The captain was straight, the child in her belly proved that. That kiss...that horrible thing she had witnessed was just a mistake. Vincent could have been telling her the truth but she found that a small corner of her heart didn't want to believe that. The same small part knew that the feelings were there and Cid had been acting weirdly since he got home.

"Vincent," Shera said slowly, "is there any...I mean...why did you kiss Cid?"

The fork that Vincent held in his hand stopped, "...it was a mistake. I told you."

"Stop it," Shera shook her head, "Don't try and spare my feelings. God, I'm not a child nor am I stupid."

Why did he keep trying to lie to her? It was obvious he thought more of the pilot than he was admitting to, it was clear to Shera. Her mind kept playing over the scene back in the inn, the dark haired male and the captain sharing a kiss. What bothered her was that the Cid seemed to lean into it, saw the look of surprise on his face when he realised he had been caught.

_She's jealous, _Chaos spoke up softly, _very jealous of what you have with the pilot._

_I don't have anything with him, _Vincent countered back, _but speaking of Cid...where is he? I haven't seen him...he hasn't left has he?_

Slowly, Vincent looked around the room, hoping to encounter some sign that the pilot was still there. Nothing but Shera seemed to catch it. Her brown eyes narrowed before she nodded at the food in front of her. The mechanic as much as she hated having the man here, didn't want to see him starve. It wouldn't be very nice.

"Cid isn't here," she offered as she rose to get the now boiling kettle, "He went out a couple of hours back, shortly after you...well, you know."

_When I called you Hojo and Cid Lucrecia, when I almost attacked you for being something you're not, _Vincent lowered his head and nodded softly, "For that I am truly sorry. I didn't mean that..."

Shera paused as she took that in, he certainly sounded sorry but why couldn't she really believe that? Why had the man called her by the creepy name Hojo? She wasn't like that man, she cared about life and what happened to people.

"How long did he say he was going to be gone for?" Vincent asked quietly as he eyed up the plate, it looked tempting and he hadn't had anything to eat in days. His stomach growled in protest at having to wait for so long.

"No...well...he said vaguely he'd be back as soon as possible," Shera replied quietly as she dumped a couple of teabags in a teapot salvaged from the garage.

Cid had left the home, Vincent's heart raced at the thought of being left alone. He had asked the pilot not to leave him, to stay with him but he had walked out on. Not even bothered to tell him that he was going, he told Shera but that was it.

_He promised...didn't he? I asked him to stay but..._Vincent clenched his fist but was caught out by Shera when she asked him a personal question about his past.

"Was Lucrecia your girlfriend or your sister?" came the relatively innocent question.

He could answer that a few ways, lying, telling the truth or completely ignoring her. Somehow, he doubted that ignoring her would be worthwhile. She seemed to know when he lied and being truthful would lead the way to more questions.

"...Sephiroth's mother" Vincent stated, not exactly lying but neither was he really willing to tell her anything further.

_That man had a mother? _Shera rubbed her stomach, praying her own child wouldn't turn out to be anything like the silver haired war general.

Vincent stood up, perhaps he should head back into the room and sleep. That hope was dashed as he suddenly felt queasy and his stomach was going to expel the small content he had managed to eat, quickly excusing himself to the bathroom.

Shera crossed her arms, she sighed softly as she looked over to the clock. What in the name of the planet could be so fascinating that the captain just had to go and check it out straight away? She wanted things to go back to the way it was, back to the good old days.

The back door opened slowly and Cid slipped in, a little surprised to see that people were actually still awake. His entire town was quiet and peaceful, everybody settling to bed and the captain had just got back into town.

He looked over to see Shera standing at the kettle and offered her a smile, "Fantastic, ya making a brew?"

A nod was his answer and Shera was going to give him the cold shoulder. Harshly, she slammed a cup down on the table and shot him a dark look. Cid dropped his gaze, unsure about what he could say. He wanted to sleep, curl up and enjoy a few hours blissful sleep.

To enjoy a world where nobody asked about things or asked things of him. Where in the little dream world he could find peace and enjoy life. Shera looked at him and snorted slightly as she saw the state of the clean clothes the pilot had left in where no longer clean. Dust and dirt had been ground into the combats and Shera couldn't place the grim on the shirt.

Cid pulled out a few slender black cases and Shera recognized them as video recordings, she's done enough of them when she had to do reports for the blonde captain back when the rocket launch was happening. He also pulled out a battered looking book but he placed that on top of the vd's and then put his hand protectively on it.

"Going to bed?" he asked softly, he was eager with dreaded anticipation to learn about what the video's held but he wasn't looking forward to it.

"Yeah..." Shera replied, "but uh...Vincent is in the bathroom. He isn't feeling so well."

Cid frowned as his gaze wandered over to the bathroom, hearing the painful sounding retching Vincent was trying to fight again and his heart went out to the man. Back in the inn last night, he had held back the long hair and had tied it into a ponytail.

"I still don't want him in the house," Shera stated softly as she headed to her bedroom.

"I aint throwing him out," Cid whispered back, "Shera...come on. Vincent is sick, he needs our help."

The female mechanic sighed softly but said nothing as she retreated into the safety of her room. The mayor of Rocket Town spared the door a glance before returning his gaze back to the items he had brought back with him.

They turned his stomach, even just to imagine that they were real images. Real scenes that Hojo had performed on the helpless and battered form of

Vincent all those years back. Could he really sit and watch through the horrible images that he was going to see?

_Shit..._he thought as he picked up the first recording and walked over to the couch and the tv.

**Hours later...**

Shera crept quietly out of the bedroom, her footsteps light and almost unnoticable against the wooden flooring of the hallway. The tv in the living room hissed quietly with static and she heard Cid shift in his sleep on the couch. What had he brought back with him from that wherever it was that he had disappeared to?

He was more willing to help a potentially dangerous man than to listen to her. Vincent was suffering from something and as kind as Shera was, she didn't want him near her or the captain. What would happen if Vincent lost control and attacked them? Would the captain really be ready to stand up for him again? Tell her that it wasn't his fault?

Shera moved to the couch and looked at the sleeping Cid. His sleep was troubled, his features twitching and his eyes fluttering as he dreamed something that she could only imagine. She leaned over and gently brushed a stray look of hair from his forehead, smiling at the action as the blonde leaned to the touch.

"...he's been like that for about an hour now..." came Vincent's whisper from behind her, "I've never seen him move about so much. He's fell off at least twice."

Vincent watched the captain, ignoring the sound that came from Shera. His eyes drifted from the captain to the bump on Shera. Pregnancy seemed to suit the woman, a maternal glow bathed around her. She would be a good mother.

Shera turned round to face the former Turk, he looked stronger than what he did a few hours back but he seemed unsteady on his feet. The female mechanic nodded slowly, Cid was never one for remaining in one place for any length of time, even when sleeping he tossed and turned.

"You look better," Shera stated quietly as not to wake the sleeping captain.

A small one sided smile graced pale lips, "It's best I leave. This way, when Cid asks where I am, you can lie with a clear conscious."

That took Shera by surprise but she found she welcomed it. It gave her a chance to be cruel back. Lie with a clear conscious indeed, if he wanted to leave the home then who was she to stop him. It wasn't as though she wanted him in the home in the first place.

"Fine," she almost spat the words out.

Vincent moved towards the front of the house, his heart plunging into his stomach as he thought about leaving the home of someone who wanted to help him. Who had done nothing more than open his home to him and extend the hand of friendship.

"Out of curiosity..." he asked softly, "what will you tell him?"

"That you left when we were sleeping," Shera answered, "doesn't have to be any complicated than that."

He paused as he reached the door and he risked a look back to the living room before closing the door without a sound behind him.


	9. Chapter 9

i don't know if anyone is still reading this but i do apologise for the *ahem* slight delay. not thrilled with this so it may probably be redone but i needed to get it out of my head

Disclaimer: Squaresoft owns

The rain thundered down over the sleepy town, the lone figure walked slowly across the now muddy street. His heart breaking with every single step he took. He couldn't bring himself to look back, he kept his head down, counting his footsteps.

He had to leave the town and home, that much was clear. Shera didn't want him near her or the blonde captain. She didn't want him in the home that she was trying to build with Cid.

_She doesn't want you anywhere near him,_ came the voice of reason, _go back and fight for your man Valentine!_

"He's not my man," Vincent stated quietly as the rain cooled his skin.

He didn't understand as to why he was having this conversation with himself, he had decided that he had to leave. Cid didn't need this sort of issue in his life. He didn't need him.

A hitched sigh caught painfully in his chest as he thought about that. Cid was strong and he might be sad for a few days but he would get on with his life and forget about him.

He kept telling himself that it was better that way, it was better that Cid thought he was well enough to be by himself though it tore at his own heart. He would miss the captain.

Vincent had hated leaving the warmth and safety of the Highwind residence. He had left Cid sleeping on the couch, static on the television and a stack of video recordings to one side. Shera had seemed to glow when he said he was leaving, she would no doubt come up with some intricate of lies.

He wondered if he actually hated leaving the warmth and safety of the house or if it was something else? A small smile flickered across his pale lips as he briefly entertained the idea that the captain might actually come out looking for him but the small spark that he felt was doused by the falling rain.

Why would Cid do that if she told him a decent enough lie? She was no doubt trying to figure out a believable story, saying that he had slipped out in the middle of the night while they were sleeping. He wrapped his arms around his chest, his long hair falling over his eyes like fat rat tails. Cid would have made a joke about the way he looked, something to make him feel human even though he wasn't.

He walked towards the rocket supports, he could see the Highwind hovering in the sky. The airship looking unloved and battered in the blackened sky. The bikini goddess looking weary and almost foolish on the tarnished metal that had managed to pull them to safety. His friend hadn't been near the airship since they had returned. Was it because of Shera or something else?

Was the something else the fact that the man couldn't go near it yet? The airship a reminder of a painful past few months or how he was different from what he was?

_He is yours, _Hellmasker spoke up suddenly, _you remember he leaned to kiss __you? Don't leave, go check in at the inn. The Highwind even, just get us out of the freaking rain you idiot!_

"Forget it," Vincent walked further, his boots making little noise in the mud, "Shera doesn't want me there or anywhere near them. I don't blame them, I tried to kill her..."

_No, you tried to kill Hojo, _Hellmasker replied surprisingly rationally, _I'd have done the same thing. I don't like her._

"Well, you won't need to worry about her any more," Vincent mumbled into the rain.

_Nooooo, you're right, _Hellmasker huffed, _you did what Turks do best. You ran. Even in retreat, you're still victorious._

A fresh wave of pain tore through Vincent, he gasped in surprise as it seemed that the rain was burning his skin that was exposed. Thunder roared above him and he was sure that a heavy storm was making it's way to the town. He had to find shelter, to find the nearest warm place to seek refuge until the storm had passed.

He was torn between heading back to the home or to keep walking. Cid deserved someone who would love him, who would give him a family and a happy heart. Not someone who could kill him if he had a mood swing. He kept walking against the pain that was now coming off him in waves but he knew his body was working against him. His strength was failing, he couldn't catch his breath.

Vincent reached one of the rusty, green support pillars, leaning against it heavily to stop himself from falling face first into the mud. His head thumped in pain but part of that was down to the fact that he wasn't exactly dressed for rain. He shouldn't have left the safe haven that had been given to him. Cid was a good man but he didn't need the problems of a monster.

_Seriously, just head back. The woman should get over her jealously. He doesn't fancy her. He's quite happy curling up to you,_ Hellmasker refused to be silent, voicing his displeasure.

"Shut up," Vincent breathed, "I'm a danger to them. I called Cid...Lucrecia and Shera Hojo. She is nothing like that bastard."

_He didn't kick you out then did he? He went out of his way to defend you, _Gillian voiced it's own thoughts on the matter, _in fact, even when I showed my face, he still shared a bed with you._

**Past...Gold Saucer for the first time...**

"Ok..." Cloud looked around the newly assembled group, "We're stuck here til the ropeway is fixed, might as well get some rest."

The blonde could see the mixed reactions from the group gathered. Tifa seemed relaxed, Barret and Red XIII were engrossed in something. Yuffie had decided to stalk a gentleman who had a fantastic win on the chocobo racing and was drunk.

Aeris was standing next to the unofficial leader, her green eyes glittering in the gaudy lighting in the main and spacious lobby. Cait Sith seemed perfectly at ease in the area, the small cat dancing on top of the huge white mog.

Vincent had taken to standing in the non existent shadows, the slender male looking uncomfortable in the lighting. Cid was standing arguing with the Gold Saucer technician about how the tram could be fixed quickly.

"Cid," Cloud shook his head, "It isn't the his fault, like Cait Sith said, these things happen."

Cid snorted his disapproval, "Bull, it's a damn joke! You just happen to win Dio's little battle game and you seriously think that the ass is going to let you walk out with his prize?"

"It is possible," Vincent voiced softly, "It's just bad luck."

"Bad luck?" Cid turned his attention to the the quiet man, "I'm noticing something in regards to that, it follows ya'll around like a bad smell."

Vincent lowered his gaze, "And now you have thrown your lot in with ours."

Blue eyes rolled but Cid offered Vincent a brilliant smile, "Never said I was smart."

"Anyhow," Cloud brought the attention back to him, "We need to split into rooms. Barret, Red and I will take one, the girls will share one..."

"I don't need a room," Cait Sith suddenly said, "I'm just gonna hang out at the Wonder Square."

Cloud nodded as he looked at the mechanical creature, "Alright, Cid and Vincent get the last room."

Vincent closed his eyes, waiting for the blonde captain to voice his displeasure about having to share a room with him. The pilot said nothing but pulled out a cigarette from the red pack that was strapped in place by the thick heavy strap of his flight goggles.

"Sir..." the poor technician that the captain had been arguing with spoke up quietly, "there's a no smoking policy in the Gold Saucer."

Cid stared at the man, "Yeah? And?"

"Well..." the man nodded to the offending item, "Please refrain from lighting it."

Cid snorted again and pulled out his lighter, "Kid, bigger asses have tried and failed to tell me not to smoke. Fuck off."

"I'm sorry sir but it's the rules," the engineer blinked, "You can't smoke in here."

The pilot growled, ready for a much larger and more vicious tirade on the young technician. Cloud had to think fast before the captain ended up in the Corel desert prison. In the short time that Cloud had known the pilot, he had a suspicion that the man was right. Who would actually be stupid enough to try and stop him?

It surprised Cloud when Vincent stepped in, the raven haired male stepping in front of Cid and the young employee of the Gold Saucer. Cid was staring at the male, mocking him by raising his lighter to his lips.

"Forgive our friend, he's...just out on day release. He's not all there," Vincent stated calmly, ignoring the surprised choke of laughter from Cid, "He has a fear of bright lights and doesn't like strangers. Smoking is his coping mechanism."

The man stared at Vincent then at Cid, "Bright lights and strangers? What is he doing here then?"

Vincent opened his mouth and found that while the first set of lies had fell out easily, the second answer was not forth coming. Crimson eyes blinked until Aeris came to the rescue.

"We're trying to help him get over his fears," the pretty woman stated cheerfully.

Cid looked rather amused at Vincent trying to defend him. He almost choked when he realised that the dark haired male had actually made a joke at his expence. Cid chuckled but said nothing. He didn't understand as to why he was doing such a thing for someone who barely knew him. Vincent barely spoke in the large group or when he did, he was so damn quiet. Cid sighed and replaced the white stick back in it's packet.

"Damn bar better be open," Cid grumbled sourly, "I ain't crazy."

Aeris turned round, "Of course you're not Ciddy. Now, how bout we all go and explore huh?"

The tech shook his head and gave the group one last look before he decided that he was of better use working on the tram to get rid of these... unusual people who had decided to spend some money at his work place.

Aeris grinned as she grabbed Cloud's arm, much to the annoyance of Tifa, "Okay people! No killing anyone this time okay? Have fun!"

The group seperated almost as soon as she said those last two words. Yuffie going off to relieve her mark of his cash. The young shinobi rubbing her hands gleefully as a wicked grin spread across her youthful features.

Cloud, Aeris and Tifa headed to the chute that boldly stated Wonder Square, Cloud being a gentleman and helping each of the girls into it. Barret and Nanaki went to the chute that read Battle Square. Cait Sith had decided to stay behind and chat with the greeter at the entrance.

It left Cid and Vincent alone. The two men looked at each other before the pilot rubbed the back of his neck. He raised an eyebrow, he had never seen the group move so damn fast since he had joined the team a few days ago. He looked at Vincent who didn't seem that bothered by it, did they ever invite him?

They all seemed to have little cliques. Barret would head off with Red XIII. Cloud had the girls fawning over him while Yuffie was just out to steal everything that wasn't bolted down to the ground. It didn't seem like the group was...a group.

"They disappear that fast normally?" Cid queried, "or is it my startling charm?"

Vincent lowered his gaze, "Yes...it's normal but I do believe you helped."

Cid pulled a face, "They really are sounding like a bunch of asses. They ever talk to you or ask you to join them?"

The two men walked in silence to the chute that claimed it lead the hotel. Cid waiting for the answer that Vincent seemed to be unwilling to give. They stopped and both men looked down the long slide. Cid assumed that the hotel would have a bar there and that Vincent could probably do with a stiff drink to the joke that the man had made.

"Does yelling by Barret count?" Vincent said quietly as they remained peering into the chute.

"Swear right back at the bastard," Cid responded, "Stand up for yourself."

Vincent said nothing as he slid into the chute, hating how the chute seemed to suck at his form, trying to pull him downwards into it. The darkness felt so cold, he spared Cid a look who seemed about as happy as he was.

Cid watched as the raven haired male disappear with a gust of wind. A faint whiff of spices and vanilla came to his nose, he frowned in mild curiosity. Vanilla? The man hadn't been anywhere near a vanilla smelling treat or scent.

He followed the gunman through the tube, not happy about how snug it felt across his shoulders. Vincent would be waiting for him as he wasn't quite surprised at being spat out quite so damn fast. The blonde crashed into the a tombstone, cracking his head loudly against the cold marble. A vile curse came from his lips as he fell to the soft, moss simulated ground. Something warm and slick ran down his temple and he spotted the look of concern on pale features on Vincent.

Vincent carefully pulled him to his feet, "Are you alright?"

"Fuck sake..." Cid growled as he gingerly touched his temple, he saw the crimson red of his blood on his gloves, "How the hell did you not whack your head?"

Vincent watched as the blonde snarl at the tombstone, giving it a hefty kick. He had read the warning above the chute, he even read the brochure that had been lying in the tram. Blue eyes regarded him for a long moment before blinking slowly.

"I had read the brochure in the tram on the way up," Vincent offered, "so I was aware of the sudden exit."

Cid shook his head, instantly regretting it as it felt like someone had smacked him over the head with a four by four plank of wood. He could see the crimson stain on the dark marble of the stone he had been up close and personal with. He moved forward and lost his footing slightly, stumbling into Vincent.

"Let's get you to our room," Vincent took hold of Cid's arm and helped him to the long winding stairs that lead to the creepy hotel that seemed to attract the tourists.

Cid removed his arm and carefully made his way. Vincent lowered his head, a pang of hurt for a brief moment floated in his heart but he pushed it down. The captain offered him a one sided smile, he rubbed the back of his neck in that strange way he did.

"I'm a pilot, I've had enough head bumps to know what I can and can't do," he explained, "I ain't drunk."

The pilot had decided that the head wound was nothing that a beer and a few painkillers couldn't sort out. Maybe some sleep but he was wary about that, he just wanted to get somewhere quiet where he could relax.

_Damn, _Cid took a deep breath, trying to clear the pain and fuzziness in his now aching head.

"Are you alright?" Vincent asked as Cid pulled his goggles down over his face, "You look...unsteady."

The shorter male blinked, "Yeah...head hurts like a bitch."

Vincent regained his arm and helped Cid up the last few steps to the hotel. The lobby was welcoming in a rather Halloween way, Vincent narrowed his eyes. Cid needed to rest and Vincent wasn't thrilled about how two minutes alone with Cid had managed to wind up with Cid nearly knocking himself out.

_Perhaps I am nothing more than bad luck, _Vincent thought, _he has done nothing to me and I have allowed him to be injured when he is with me._

The two men walked up to the reception desk, Cid leant on it for balance. His blue eyes taking in the lobby, holograhic ghosts disappeared and reappeared at a table in the corner. Dark corners were clear to see and every inch of the floor seemed to be covered with a gaudy patterned carpet.

Vincent looked around the room, looking for a member of staff. He couldn't see a receptionist, there was a little bell on the desk though and Vincent narrowed his eyes.

_Quaint, _Vincent thought as he regarded it, he tapped it with the palm of his flesh hand, a loud, clear ring came from it.

He and Cid both jumped in surprise when Mr Hangman screamed from his sudden call. The thing's face twisted in a smile as it hung three feet off the ground from the rope around it's neck. Vincent could feel Galian roaring in surprise and wanting to tear the thing to shreds.

The captain allowed a string of expletives that even the former Turk felt was rude. The man glaring at the receptionist, fire burning in the blue orbs. Cid fell silent but that didn't stop him from thinking murderous thoughts.

"Hi! Welcome to the Ghost Hotel!" came the cheerfully helpful voice, "I'm Mr Hangman, how can I help you today?"

"We have rooms booked," Vincent replied, "I'm not sure however as to which name it is booked under. Try...Strife?"

"Of course!" Mr Hangman kept his cheerful attitude, "Here we are! You must be Mr's Highwind and Valentine. You have room 13, here are your keys."

Vincent took the keys from the skeleton hand, "Thank you."

Cid pressed his hand against his temple, "13? Oh goody. Lady Luck seems to have ditched me."

"I assume there is a first aid kit in the room?" Vincent ignored Cid.

"Of course," Mr Hangman stated cheerfully again, "May I help you to your room?"

"Do we look like we need help?" Cid mumbled as he headed towards the stairs, "This place is freaking weird."

Vincent said nothing but followed his team mate up the stairs, the former Turk surprised at how easily the man was staying with him. The others would avoid him like the plague when they were together, making excuses as to why they had to leave to do something. Cid had done nothing of the sort and would speak to him as though he wasn't a monster with a claw for a hand. What did Cid see in him that caused this friendship?

_He's gotten to you, _his demon mused_, so suddenly as well. It took her longer to get you to care for her._

They fell into a comfortable silence as they walked to the room. They passed merry people who were leaving rooms and Vincent had been stopped by a few of them to ask if he was a member of staff. Cid had smirked but bless fully had refrained from answering.

One man asked if Cid was in costume with the now clotting blood on his white scarf and the pilot had stated 'no, he wasn't, he had simply asked if Vincent worked for the hotel,' the man quickly avoided him, along with everybody else.

Vincent sighed but had allowed a smile to reach his pale lips. That was another thing that the blonde could do easily. Cid seemed to ease smiles out of him easily, a look or a joke or even a smile could tempt him into returning one back.

The two men entered the room they had been given and Vincent was instantly soothed by the darker and more calmer décor of the room. His relief was short lived as his heart crashed into his stomach as he discovered a snag.

Cid said nothing as he discovered the same issue. Long shadows fell across the room and the pilot headed towards the kettle on the large dresser table. Cid grinned to himself, sod the beer, he would murder a cuppa.

"You want a cup?" Cid lifted up a plain white mug, "Screw the beer."

Vincent swallowed, his throat feeling like it was the size of a tiny straw. Why hadn't he said anything about the sleeping arrangement? It wasn't going to be easy, he nodded slowly as he went in search of the first aid kit to give him something other to think about.

"Don't snore do you?" Cid asked as he busied himself with making tea, "or sleepwalk naked do you?"

"...not to my knowledge," Vincent responded as he came back with the kit, "Do you?"

"Nope," Cid frowned slightly, "well, not to my knowledge."

The former Turk snorted softly, "There's only one bed."

"It's a queen size," Cid shrugged as he poured the hot water into the two mugs.

"I don't need to sleep..." Vincent stated slowly, unsure why he was saying this at all. The words were just tripping from his mouth uncalled for.

Cid just looked at him, "I don't bite, if ya have wandering hands, let 'em wander down your own damn body."

"I can sleep on the floor," Vincent suggested, a blush washing over his features as he was surprised as to where the conversation was going.

_Don't think he's afraid of you, _Galian snorted in amusement, _even after turning into me. He's...unusual that one. I like him, let's keep him around. Kill the others but not him, he's fun._

_I'm not killing anyone, _Vincent shot back, _stop suggesting that._

Galian did have a point though. It had only been a few hours since he had turned into Galian in front of him. Cid had been surprised and had fallen silent, as though he was trying to process the new information about the quietest member of the group. It had been in the Gold Saucer that the blonde had found his voice again and he had used it to pick a fight.

"Ya aint sleeping on the floor," Cid handed Vincent the mug, "Like I said, I don't bite."

_No, _Galian grinned mentally, _I might though._

Vincent felt a blush wash over his cheeks again, _Silence, he's with that woman Shera._

Galian fell silent, seemingly bested for the moment. The creature skulking back to it's place in Vincent's mind to have a sulk about losing the battle for the time being. Vincent took a sip of the tea and found it to be lacking any real strength or taste.

Cid clicked his fingers in front of Vincent's face, "Ya seem to zone out when talking to me. I'm really that dull?"

The former Turk blinked his crimson eyes in surprise. He focused on the shorter blonde, he had noticed that? It wasn't something that he had done deliberately, Galian seemed to be more vocal when the captain was around.

"No...of course not," Vincent watched him as the blonde sat on the bed, "I...I just..."

Cid sighed softly as he took a sip of his tea, pulling a face as the flavour tasted bitter. It was horrible, cheap tea bags and the milk had been left out for a while. Vincent placed his mug on the dresser table and went to fix the cut on the pilot's head. Cid watched him, his blue eyes saying nothing but a pleasant enough look on his features. The pilot sat a little straighter, not phased at all about the fact that the scariest member of the group was playing nurse to him.

"You still want that drink?" Vincent stood close to the blonde, regarding the wound on how to sort it.

Cid remained still as he stared into the chest of the taller male, "I'm good, this entire place is giving me a damn headache though."

"Tell me about it," Vincent murmured, "I think we have a few hours before the tram is fixed, grab some sleep. I'll watch over you."

"Watch over me?" Cid closed his eyes as Vincent softly began cleaning the wound on his head, "I'm fine."

Vincent smiled softly at that, when the pilot didn't have a cigarette in his mouth, he actually looked handsome. Dark lashes framed Wutain shaped eyes and Vincent wondered which part of the blonde's family had came from there. Cid opened his eyes and raised a blonde eyebrow as Vincent held up two fingers.

"What are ya doing?" Cid queried as he looked at two pale fingers, "Two what?"

"Your eyesight is fine," Vincent stepped back, "I'm concerned that you may have concussion."

A deep laugh filled Vincent's ears, Cid looked genuinely amused. The pilot shook his head and winced slightly as he tapped his head.

"I'm a pilot," Cid offered as an explanation, "I aint concussed, takes more than a little knock on the head to take me out."

"Sleep then," Vincent stated.

"You sleep," Cid countered like a child.

Vincent sighed mentally, it was like dealing with a stubborn child. He had seen the mood swings the blonde could have, the former Turk removed his cloak but kept the cowling over his lower face. He kicked off his heavy boots. Cid did the same but he was loath about leaning over to remove them and he seemed reluctant to remove his flight jacket.

Vincent sat beside him on the bed in silence and the captain fell back on the bed. Cid sighed contently as the softness of the mattress seemed to soak up some of the discomfort he had in his body. He could feel the warmth from Vincent beside him and he couldn't explain as to why it felt rather nice.

**Hours later...**

Vincent heard knocking on the door, an unguarded yawn rushed from him as he gathered his thoughts into working order. Galian was still silent in his mind, something that he was rather happy about.

He felt something warm on his left side, heavy and snoring lightly. Vincent looked down and spotted the blonde captain curled up beside him, an arm snaked around his waist comfortably.

_What? _Vincent froze for a moment, _what happened? How...?_

He was relieved to see that they were both dressed, minus footwear and his cloak. Cid seemed to be perfectly relaxed in his position, his tanned features soft and twitching slightly in his sleep. Vincent snorted softly as not to wake the male in his arms, why had they ended up like this?

He remembered Cid crashing as soon as his head touched the pillow and Vincent had kept a lamp on so he could read the dismal reading material provided by the hotel. Cid had mumbled in his sleep about strange things that Vincent had no clue about and he was worried when the captain had stray tears falling from his closed eyes.

A gentle touch to the shoulder had soothed the tears away and had calmed the captain back into a peaceful sleep. Vincent had watched him for a long time after that, making sure that his sleep was undisturbed for the duration. The former Turk must have dozed off at some point during the lulled silence.

"Wake up chief," Vincent said softly, "I believe we're being summoned."

Cid slowly stirred, his arm slowly pulling away before resting just a few inches away from the former Turk's groin. The captain seemed to be totally oblivious to the fact as to where his hand was, simply cuddling up closer.

_You both fell asleep, _Galian yawned mentally, _he dozed off first, he was rather cute._

_Be silent, _Vincent closed his eyes and rubbed his temple, _leave him alone and me._

Cid yawned loudly and stretched slowly, Vincent felt the captain freeze suddenly as reality crashed down on him. He felt the blonde swallow heavily and the muscles in the captain tense instantly. Both said nothing as Cid pulled himself into a sitting position but had managed to tangle himself quite thoroughly leg wise.

He sighed in resignation, "I uh...did I...shit...did I curl up to you?"

Vincent nodded but he kept his face still. "I believe so but I don't mind. You were cold and the bump to the head..."

"Right!" Cid agreed quickly, "Right, it doesn't happen often. One off."

Vincent raised an eyebrow, it wasn't the first time and he doubted it would be the last time. He found it rather intriguing how the blonde would curl into him whenever they shared the same small area. He had always been awake before the blonde and would elegantly move the blonde away as not to disturb him.

The door opened slowly and Tifa popped her head in. Chocolate eyes widened in surprise when she spotted the closeness of the newest members. Vincent was partially hidden by the broader frame of Cid who had his arms placed either side of the former Turk. The two men seemed to be mere inches away from each other.

"We got a meeting downstairs," Tifa collected herself, "Head down in a couple of minutes, I think we're gonna be leaving soon."

"Cheers," Cid replied as he got off the bed, "We have time for some breakfast right?"

"Ahh..." Tifa pulled a face, "They stopped serving about an hour ago."

The young woman left the room but had left the door open. Cid leaned over the side of the bed and began pulling on his boots, his head still throbbed but he could ignore it once he got his nicotine intake. He didn't want to think about how he had woken up next to the raven haired male yet again and once again, Vincent had said nothing.

"I'd uh...ya maybe not tell anyone what happened?" he said quietly, "I don't..."

_Why is he so upset about it? _Vincent went to get his boots, "It's alright. I...don't mind."

_No, we don't mind. It's rather nice actually, it's been ages since we last had someone who cuddled up to us like that. He's even warmer than..._ Galian spoke up again, he seemed to have forgotten his sulk from earlier but Vincent didn't want the demon speaking about Lucrecia the way it had been doing.

_Stop doing that, you will not speak her name, _Vincent growled at the demon, _you have no right._

"Ya keep doing that," Cid clicked his fingers as he paused from lacing his boots, "Who are you talking to?"

"No one," Vincent stated quickly, "We should join the others."

**Present...**

Vincent leaned against the support railing, his strength gone and he was soaked to the skin. He was freezing and the rain didn't seem to be stopping any time soon. Huge muddy puddles had formed across the fields.

His mind went back to those in the Highwind residence, what would Shera have told the blonde about him leaving the home? Vincent closed his eyes, he was exhausted. His demons had fallen silent as they went through that night. They went as far to try and drum up more images or times when the captain had ended up in his arms.

_Return to the Highwind residence, _Chaos spoke for all four of the demons, _rest, allow the blonde to look after you._

"He doesn't want me!" Vincent struggled to push himself off the support, "He has Shera, he left me in the home when I asked him not to. He has no need for me."

He fell to his knees as he tried to move again, "...I'm a monster who's demons are dying. I have no place in his world."

A pair of warm arms pulled him up, Vincent avoided the face of his helper. He focused more on his now filthy cuffs on his sweatpants, staring at the dull tips of his boots. A heavy jacket wrapped around him, soaking up the rain and supplying him with warmth. He recognised the smell.

"What the hell are you doing?" Cid asked, anger clear in his voice, "I wake up to find that you aint in bed, Seriously, any reason?"

"I...I can't stay with you," Vincent sniffed back tears that were desperately wanting to fall, "It's too dangerous, I could kill you."

Cid took the information in, "But ya won't. I trust you."

Vincent closed his eyes, wanting nothing more than to fall into Cid's arms. He felt comfort when the blonde didn't remove his hands from his shoulders. He wanted Cid, to look after the blonde and to be looked after but Shera would not allow that. Shera had rightful claim on the the captain.

Crimson eyes avoided sky blue of the the man in front of him. Trust wasn't the issue, he trusted the captain without question, he just didn't trust himself. He would unleash his demons to an enemy that threatened his friend but right now, if he had a mood swing or another episode where he thought Shera was Hojo... could Cid really stop him?

"Vincent," Cid rarely used his first name, "Come..."

The mayor of Rocket Town found himself falling backwards into the huge muddy puddle that had formed in the rain. Warm lips crushed against his own as Vincent fell on top of him, the former Turk had straddled him. The former Turk might have been soaked and cold but Cid found himself enjoying the contrasting heat on his thighs and lower stomach from where Vincent was sitting.

His mind kept telling him to push the gun slinger off him but his body and his heart seemed to be working against him yet again. Cid blinked in surprise as Vincent didn't break the kiss. He felt Vincent's cold hand snake up his now wet t-shirt, pale fingertips traced old scars as they travelled upwards.

Cid did the same, Vincent was surprised at the captain for having bare hands. The man normally wore his long flight gloves as though they were attached to his skin. Cid's hands slipped under the heavy jacket and the wet shirt of the brunette's. Vincent pushed further, gasping slighting when the blonde's hands copied his soft movements of tracing old scars. Why did Cid allow this contact? They were both soaked now, the combined weight of the two men making them sink into the mud.

He was pulled closer to Cid, a contented moan came from the blonde. The blonde raised his knees so the former Turk could sit back slightly on them, allowing him to relax even further.

_I need this, _the former Shin-ra employee groaned softly as he felt Cid buck slightly as Vincent managed to find a still tender spot, _he needs this. He needs me, not her._

They broke the kiss only long enough to breathe, this time, it was Cid who recaptured Vincent's lips. His hands still roaming but he slipped his right hand into the golden claw on Vincent's left. Vincent stilled for a moment but he felt the blonde smile softly. It seemed as though Vincent was intent on sucking the very air from the blonde's lungs.

_I shouldn't be doing this, _Cid thought but he pushed the words down, it felt right however. Having Vincent on top of him felt amazingly right. It made his mind fuzzy and yet clear at the same time but there was one thing that kept resonating in his skull.

It felt right.

Vincent broke the kiss, "Cid...I..."

Cid panted for breath, his lips burning from the kiss. His mind slowly lifting the fog that had gathered, he didn't trust himself to move or speak. His backside was freezing but his chest was warm. He didn't want to move right now, neither did Vincent but both of them were soaking. Thunder roared above them and lightening flashed.

There was nothing to say, they were both consenting adults. Cid knew he shouldn't find the man on top of him attractive but there was something about him that made his body react. Vincent searched the blonde's eyes, looking for the anger or revulsion that he knew should be there but he suddenly realised that the blonde still held on to his hand. He didn't seem to be wanting to move it soon either.

"I'm sorry," Vincent blushed at the captain, "...Cid..."

"Where the hell did that come from?" Cid rolled his eyes and smiled shyly, his hair sticking down over his forehead.

Vincent lowered his eyes, "I...I just...I've been..."

"An idiot? Frustrating? Come on," Cid shook his head in mild amusement, "let's head home. Ya can explain when we get back what the hell you were doing."

**Highwind residence...**

Shera stared at the two two muddy and soaked men in front of her. Cid had woke up about half an hour after the former Turk had left the home, not best pleased about finding the sick man had left without telling him. Shera had lied of course, she wasn't wanting to say that she had watched the man leave the home and hadn't even tried to stop him.

She had felt relief when the man had left, finding comfort when the door had clicked closed. The comfort had now gone, the man now standing back in her kitchen, dripping water and mud. Cid looked the worse of the pair, his blue eyes watching everything that moved.

Vincent had done the decent thing and had avoided eye contact with her. He was wearing the captain's jacket and his thick hair was covered in mud at the tips and his clothes weren't better off. Cid raised an eyebrow, shivering in his wet clothes.

"You pair stay here," Shera ordered, "I am not letting you traipse mud through the house after I've spent all day cleaning it."

Cid grinned in amusement but he moved to the kettle only to be given a hard stare from the woman. He froze and lowered his head, he wasn't going to push his luck with the mousey woman at the moment. He couldn't explain it but he felt lighter even though his clothes were caked in mud.

"Stay exactly where you are," Shera stated as she went to find dry clothes and towels, "I mean it."

Shera walked out of the kitchen, her heart sinking in her chest. Cid had went off to find the man, returning in a pleasant mood. Vincent obviously hadn't told him that she had seen him leave. The engineer didn't want him here, every second that he stayed here felt like Cid was being lost to her. Rocket Town's mayor should be fussing over her, fussing over the airship, not playing nurse.

_Why is he here? I thought he wanted to leave, _Shera went to the linen cupboard and pulled out some towels, _It was his choice after all._

She paused for a moment, trying to hear what the two men in the kitchen were talking about. They seemed to be quiet. The timid engineer had never hated anyone in her life but she had a growing dislike for the man the captain had brought back with him.

Cid seemed to be torn between her and Vincent. It upset her to see the man she was pregnant to taking care of a man he had known only for a few months. He didn't need the Avalanche member in his life.

Where had the man been when Cid had woke in the nights from nightmares? Where was he when the blonde needed him years ago? Shera was the one constant solid thing in the captain's life and she would be damned if some monster took him away from her.

She took a calming breath and walked back to the kitchen, a snort of surprise came from her. The two muddy men had actually followed her orders and hadn't seemed to move. Muddy pools of water had formed at their feet. The pilot looked deep in thought, staring thoughtfully at the washing machine. A shiver raced down his spine and he jerked suddenly, Vincent snapped his eyes to him.

"Someone walked over my grave," Cid replied sheepishly.

Shera threw the towels over to the two men, they caught the fluffy items with ease. She suddenly realised that she hadn't brought them clothes. Cid peeled off his wet t-shirt, showing off his tanned torso to the other two people in the room. The woman frowned slightly when she saw the ugly scar that ran across his waist, he had never told her how he got that scar.

She knew about some of them, not the why though. Her captain would talk a lot but he would never really talk about anything of himself. Had the captain shared the tales with the former Turk? Had he told him things that Shera didn't know about?

Vincent was more reluctant in shedding his clothing. He stood next to the blonde, Shera wondered what had been said to make him return. He was standing close to Cid, his crimson eyes watching the blonde with a look that Shera couldn't exactly place.

_It's probably nothing, _Shera thought as she went to get clean clothes, _he probably just followed him like a puppy._

She frowned as she looked out some clothes for both of them, again, she pulled out some sweatpants, underwear and t-shirts. The captain had quite a few pairs of everything that he had never worn once. Shera stopped as she reached the kitchen door, listening to see if they were talking but she heard Cid take his boots off. One of them sneezed but Shera didn't know who.

She walked into the kitchen and was surprised when she spotted Cid in his boxers and eyeing the wash basket on top of the washing machine hopefully. Vincent was covered by both towels and his clothing was a neat pile compared to the messy bundle that Cid had left. The dark haired man seemed to be hugely uncomfortable standing in naught but his underwear and the two towels.

She said nothing but she looked down at his feet, her heart dropped slightly when she saw scars running upwards from the top of his big toe to his ankle.

_They...look painful, _she thought as she handed them the clothes, _how did he get them?_

Cid shunned the underwear but pulled on the warm clothes. Vincent was more discreet and had slipped off to the bathroom. He had gave her a grateful smile when she handed him his bundle of clothes but he didn't say anything. He knew that he wasn't welcomed in the home.

"I'm freezing," Cid sniffed as he wandered to the washing machine, he shoved the two wet bundles of clothes in, "Think that damn storm followed us from Nibelheim."

Shera smiled awkwardly as she rubbed her swollen belly, she wanted to scream. He was acting like this happened all the time, she wasn't jealous but she had fought to be with Cid for five long years after the failed rocket launch.

_What is so damn alluring about Mr Valentine? _Shera snorted in amusement as Cid battled with the washing machine, she kept playing that scene back at the inn over in her mind.

"Cid?" Shera took a step forward, "Why did you kiss him?"

She hated how he froze, his back facing her. She knew that he would be racking his brain, trying to think of an answer. His broad shoulders sagged, she knew his body language off by heart.

He didn't know or he did and he wasn't wanting to say.

If he didn't know then Shera still had a hope, it meant that Vincent hadn't completely stolen him from her. It could be a phase, Shera knew that people in close quarters and horrific situations could fall for one another. It might have been a lack of options but once the captain settled down, he would see things clearly.

Vincent was quite feminine to look at, delicate features, long hair and a soft voice. Perhaps Cid had been fooled?

"Well?" Shera pressed, "You've had time to think over it."

"I don't know," Cid breathed quietly as he fiddled with the controls on the machine in front of him, "It felt...it was..."

It was what? Great? The right thing to do? Cid frowned as he remained staring at the controls. He hadn't fought the man off at the inn and the rocket support. In fact, he had pretty much encouraged the man second time around. It had been a messy kiss then, surprising to say the least. Vincent had been intent on the kiss and Cid tried to respond in the same way.

They had always been close in the group, they always bunked together in the same room. They always looked out for one another in battle. Cid had refused to let the man feel depressed about how he looked or how the others treated him.

"I still need time," Cid said softly.


End file.
